We return to the Tree of Plenty Mall for the last half of the story's flashback. This could have gone on for three pages, maybe even four. However, I thought it better to wrap things up now and dive headfirst into the main story, rather than spinning my wheels on needless foreshadowing.
While I'm here, though, I may as well share the flashback script as it was originally conceived:
---
(circa 2779AD. Elle, just one and a half, toddles behind her mother in a vibrant shopping mall. As she walks past the window of a toy store, she notices the stuffed animal of her dreams; a walking, talking plush hand-stitched by the gods themselves. She stops and frantically points at the display.)
Elle: "Mommy, look! Me wanty! Can has?!"
Ada: "Well, that IS kind of cute... I wonder how much- GAAK!"
(After seeing the price, Ada spit-takes her soda and launches into a coughing fit)
Ada: "Can't has, can't has! That thing is three hundred oaks! Do you know how much money that is?!"
(Elle lifts up three fingers)
Ada: "You're gonna need a lot more fingers."
(Elle looks up at her mother with wide, tear-brimmed eyes)
Ada: "Look honey bear, I wish I could get that for you, but I can't afford it. With the way things are now, it'd take a decade before I could."
(Elle grins widely, hands to her hips)
Elle: "Me wait."
(Ada scoops Elle off the ground)
Ada: "It's not gonna happen. Besides, we need to go home and get you changed. I'll get you something nice next time, promise."
(As Ada walks away with her daughter over her shoulder, Elle reaches out for the toy in vain, watching it vanish into the horizon)
Elle: "Dumb diaper..."
---
Also, here are a few stray observations for those interested:
* I switched over to lineless artwork for the backgrounds... I mean, aside from the floor tiles. It feels less intrusive that way, even if they're still rather plain. The fox couple was added to the cafe at the last minute to offer some variety, but I suspect I'll have to jump into both these pages in the near future to add more activity.
* The story is really girl-centric this time out, isn't it? I probably should have focused on Byron first, but when I came up with this story, I loved it so much that I just had to lead off with it. Besides, you don't really know Ada or Elle yet, and it's about time you were introduced.
* Hey, a wet diaper shot that actually fits comfortably in the plot! Go me! You know, I should have made that diaper thick 'n ill-fitting, the way they were in the 1970s before they got the design down to a science, but it's effective enough.
Keywords
female
1,009,107,
diaper
68,921,
bear
45,369,
babyfur
35,360,
diapers
19,444,
babyfurs
4,601,
mall
648,
black bear
411,
denied
35
Details
Published:
12 years, 1 month ago
22 Mar 2012 01:53 CET
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