One Spring afternoon, Caiden was having a playdate with his best friend Grayson and his cousin Tabi. Caiden's uncle and aunt were away for the weekend so Tabi was staying with his family. Grayson had already planned on coming over so Caiden's parents went ahead and took him for the day too. The more the merrier right?
The playdate with Caiden started off pretty well. Caiden greeted him at the door and then instantly ran off to go play. They decided that they would build a fort and play Army. Meanwhile, Tabi was busy with big girl things (i.e. using the potty) and was not there to give input on what they were going to do.
After Tabi got back from the potty she found the boys dressed for battle, armed with Nerf guns, secured in a pillow fort, and staring her down. She mentioned that she wanted to play too, but was rudely given the explanation that "Girls can't play Army!" as the boys pointed to the crudely drawn sign and stuck their tongues out at her. Tabi was of course upset that she wasn't allowed to play, but she was in no position to negotiate, so she stormed off down the hall to Caiden's room.
Chemical Warfare
Not long after the tots ran off that yucky girl, the boys ran into another problem. The fort was very secure and solid, but it lacked in space. That created an issue when Caiden made a *ahem* deposit in his pants. Grayson could only take so much of it before he had to abandon his friend and report the problem to the M.o.M.M. (Ministry of Maternal Magistrates) on grounds of illegal use of chemical/gas weapons. Caiden was rolled up shortly after the report was filed and taken away for a quick intervention and diaper change.
Preparing for War
Tabi was not going to take any nonsense from some stinky boys and immediately began preparing to strike back. First she grabbed some protective gear from the toybox. She managed to find a fire fighter's hat and cowboy boots. Both are very useful and intimidating when it comes to combat against boys and Nerf rounds. She also found a tutu that looked pretty on her and put that on as well. What's the point of fighting if you can't look good doing it? After that, Tabi grabbed some of the stuffed animals from around the room for an army. She smiled as she was almost ready to face Caiden and Grayson. Unfortunately there were no more weapons left. The boys took all of the Nerf guns and there was nothing left for her. She looked around the room some more and ended up finding some water balloons stached away in one of the tubs of toys. 'This is perfect' Thought Tabi to herself as she ran to the bathroom and filled up the balloons with water. Now she was ready. Tabi grabbed the supplies and marched to the living room to meet the boys.
The Battle
Tabi arrived in the living room and began to set up her plushie army on the coffee table. The boys were skeptical and watched her but didn't see her as much of a threat. The did not see the supply of water balloons that Tabi placed behind the coffee table and out of their sight. Once Tabi set up the army, she called out to the boys and demanded that she be able to play in the fort with them or there would be a battle for it. Caiden and Grayson laughed at each other and arrogantly left the fort to meet Tabi in open combat. Tabi was patient and waited until they were pretty close to her before she slung a water balloon at Caiden and managed to soak them both. The boys were shocked and immediately returned fire, hitting some of the plushies and Tabi as well. The fight went on for a few minutes and in that time Tabi managed to not only soak the boys, but the fort, couch, and floor as well. Caiden and Grayson caused their fair amount of damage as well but shooting a lamp and vase and breaking both of them. The only reason the battle ceased was because a representative from M.o.M.M. (Ministry of Maternal Magistrates) came by and demanded an explanation.
Blame Game
Like any war between nations, each one blames the other for starting it. This situation is no different as the rep from M.o.M.M. (Ministry of Maternal Magistrates) started interrogating each of them on why the living room was destroyed and who was at fault. It didn't take much for any of them to throw the other under the bus. Each tot realized that they could be in big trouble as the boys knew that they were not allowed to shoot the Nerf guns in the house and same for Tabi with her water balloons. It didn't take long for M.o.M.M. to deliver their guilty verdict on all parties involved. Each toddler's heart dropped and they grabbed the seat of their diaper or Pull-Up as they knew what was coming next.
The Casualties of War
Each of the guilty party were sentenced to ten swats with the wooden spoon on their bare hineys for crimes against furniture. The rep from M.o.M.M. (Ministry of Maternal Magistrates) swiftly and effectively removed their diapers/Pull-Up, bent them over her lap, and paddled them red for their crimes. All tots were sore and bawling by the time it was over.
The Treaty
Following their punishment, the boys and Tabi were forced to sign a treaty by the rep from M.o.M.M. (Ministry of Maternal Magistrates) as they all hope this will never happen again. Caiden and Tabi sat on some very soft cushions and hacked out a peace treaty while Grayson served out the remainder of his time-out. The treaty included that they must play nicely together, no dessert for the rest of the weekend, and no Nerf guns or balloons for the foreseeable future.
Uh okay,.. playing with waterballoons indoor..that is pretty nasty cubs.. and i feel kinda bad to say this but a little spanking and learn to play nice is important sometimes.
Uh okay,.. playing with waterballoons indoor..that is pretty nasty cubs.. and i feel kinda bad to sa
tato
