People already seemed to have their phones out. There was a huge spectacle happening in the park today.
There was a huge crowd that had gathered at the infamous Centralized Park in the middle of New Twerk City. Everyone seemed to be getting out of the way for the most part. Parents were having to pull back their children because they were getting too excited. Teenagers had very little fear of situations like this. The only thing they cared about was online clout so they sat awkwardly on top of benches to film what was going on.
Even some old people took interest. They found what was happening quaint if you could believe it.
Everyone knew what was going on though. The Brat Pack had touched down about five minutes ago and were running amok, doing a ton of horrible pranks in the area. It was a brat-apocolypse. Who could possibly save them?
Descending from above, was a purple and green hero in a three-clawed costume. They landed on the bench like a bird, perching with pride and shining like a true star.
Even though they looked positively wicked, in truth, he’s what true heroism looks like.
Say hello to The Infectious Imp.
He stood on an overturned trash can in a downward pose and leered ahead at the opposition before him. “I’m giving you punks one chance,” He said, the yellow in his eyes going a bit bright. He even swung his hips to the side to look dramatic and smexy. “Walk away now and I’ll try not to embarrass you in front of everyone when I tell your mommies what you’ve done.”
Imp suddenly perked up after he said this. He turned around when he heard the sniffling of what sounded like a little girl. When he looked, his suspicions were confirmed.
She was an adorable little thing. She wasn’t very tall at all and she had a pink backpack with tons of cute stickers decorating it. Seeing that she’d been crying, Imp gave her a thumbs up and let his mask stretch into a bit of a smirk. “Don’t worry, kid. I’ve got this.”
The girl smiled and nodded. She seemed to believe him.
Robbie AKA Wedgie Master, was floating about six inches off the ground with his arms crossed. His black cape fluttered in the wind, showing off the blue and white outfit he was dawned in. “Oh noes. He’s doing the tough guy voice.”
Headstrong the Hare landed hard onto the tipped over bench beside him and splintered the wood. He was quite the strange looking guy. His ears looked normal at first but they sprung out and ripped into clenched fists. His bunny ears were in the shape of actual human hands at the end.
He clenched the furry knuckles above him and said with a smirk, “Whoa. Did you hear that though, Robbie? He said he’s gonna embarrass us.”
Wedgie Master leaned forward with a giggle. “Yeah. Even though we ALL know HE’S the one wearing cartoon briefs, right?”
“Yeah! And they probably have little ponies on them!” Headstrong laughed.
Imp snorted. “Writing fan fiction about my underwear huh? I didn’t know being a brat and a pervert was something that overlapped.”
The final member of the Brat Pack came down with a massive thud. He wore a purple and green outfit as well but it was a lot brighter than Imp’s and came with a visor and a swirl pattern with those colors for a helmet.
“What about you? You got any predictions about what’s going on underneath all this?” Imp gestured to himself, wiggling his hips sensuously again.
Hypno-Mouse sniffed. He didn’t say anything. The swirl pattern on his helmet just continued to rotate ever so slowly.
Who was the Infectious Imp anyway and why was this slightly plump young man here? Why, he was a hero of course. A vigilante to some. However, he was a marvel to all.
Who was he really? His name was Judeth Jades. He was nineteen years old, a pizza boy, a high school dropout, and an extremely overconfident disaster.
He held up his three clawed gloves and simulated a count down on his fingers. “Last Chance.”
The Wedgie Master did a theatrical sigh, shaking his head back and forth. “You know what guys? I think he needs a reminder.”
“Doesn’t he always?” Headstrong grinned.
“Alright, you asked for it!” Imp snapped and rushed forward. The fight was on and it was glorious…ly quick.
In one fell swoop, Headstrong swung his ear fist over and rammed it deep into Imp’s gut. Imp went wide-eyed and gurgled out a gust of wind the size of a tornado.
He gasped and coughed before the momentum followed through and he was sent spiraling across the way. His head bounced off of a fire-hydrant, leaving him cartwheeling through air in a spread-eagle position.
With a heroic slam he landed on the ground with his butt thumping up and down on the pavement. It seemed to hurt so good.
Wedgie Master reached his arm over and grabbed at the back of his outfit. He hoisted the tights he wore upwards into a tights wedgie that got his outfit all up that bubbly butt.
Imp let out a shriek of pain and began flailing about like crazy.
In his desperation, he sprayed a fray of sticky, poisonous, gloop at Robbie’s cape. Robbie shot to the side, excitedly managing to avoid having it hit the fire hydrant.
“Why you–!” Wedgie Master whirled Jude around and swung him into a newspaper box. It bent at an awkward angle before he was flung over once more and slammed against the window of a food truck. Imp’s eyes crossed and he pursed his lips in a painful hum before slowly sliding down with a groan.
Wedgie Master laughed and let Imp flop to the ground again before Headstrong stomped back over.
“Alright, up you go!” The hare snickered before his massive ear-arm grabbed Imp by the back of his suit and hoisted him up to eye-level. He presented his butt for the crowd and even gestured at it lovingly.
“Now then, let me ask you an important question,” Headstrong made a bit of a kissy face. “Who’s your mommy?”
“Wh-What?” Imp asked, groaning in pain as his eyes spun. He was hearing chirping birdies and couldn’t quite make out what the hare had just said.
Thankfully, he was happy to reiterate it.
Headstrong raised his other ear palm and began slapping against Imp’s butt ridiculously fast while shouting.
“I SAID WHO”S YOUR MOMMY!”
With each word a loud SPANK was cut into it. He rapidly increased the pace and Imp’s gurgles and drools turned into funny little spank hiccups. Everyone was loving it.
Yeah, he was the hero, but he looked so cute getting spanked. What could they do but watch?
Imp bit into his lip a little, making a grunting face that amused the onlookers even more. There was even some wheezing from the crowd. A kid even yelled for the funny bunny to smack him harder. Someone probably even instructed him to go for the balls.
Headstrong kept going though. He wanted to hear him say it. Unfortunately, Imp, or Jude rather, had enough integrity not to.
“He’s not gonna say it,” Wedgie Master stated for him. “You gotta soften him up in the mind a little bit. Make him realize just how big a wimp he really is.”
He turned to leer at Hypno-Mouse. The mouse smiled back and began spinning the device on his head.
Jude looked into it and his jaw dropped. He felt a swelling in his head and then the swirls came. They were oh so pretty!
He then blinked a couple of times and shook his head to clear away the cobwebs.
“No… no way! Nuh-uh!” He snapped. “You’re not gonna get me with that bullcrap!”
“Oh wow,” Hypno-Mouse raised his brow. “He resisted it this time. Fancy that.”
“Well, well, look at you Mr. Mature,” Wedgie Master snickered.
Truthfully, Imp had surprised even himself. It was a rare thing for him to break out of that. He didn’t even fully realize that he’d done so until he was being praised for it.
Well, sort of. These were still obvious taunts.
“My turn!” Wedgie Master announced, slamming his titanium gauntlets together.
Hypno-Mouse tilted his head. "Oh wow! He broke out of it today. How rare!"
Wedgie Master cracked his titanium gauntlets together. "My turn."
He took flight and began zipping and bopping around Jude at breakneck speeds. Jude looked about, staggering a little with his jaw going a little unhinged. He felt like time was escalating for him.
He tried to strike at him but it was of no use. Wedgie Master was too fast. Eventually, he felt something peck at his outfit. The sharp metal of Wedgie Master’s gauntlets began to cut into what he was wearing.
His belt was slashed in two. Then the top of his outfit. Then, of course, his pants were rendered a useless pile of shreds before everyone!
“AAAAGH!” Jude gasped and frantically tried to cover himself but the back of his head was grabbed and it instantly called for his attention here.
“Swirly time!” Headstrong announced.
He slammed the hero downward and dunked Jude’s masked head into the squishy mud puddle that was before them.
With a little bit of excess rubbing under their belt, they then flung his head up and laughed as he coughed and sputtered.
“You’re so dead when I get out of this!” He gasped.
“Uh, no,” Robbie snickered back. “Didn’t you read the script? You NEVER get out of this, Dunderhead!”
He planted Jude’s face back into the mud and raised him back up again. “See?”
“DWEERP!” was Jude’s response. His eyes were rolling.
Another round of laughter happened.
Oh but it wasn’t over yet.
“No one move. We’re still putting on a show here!” Wedgie Master shouted before extending his claws. With one massive swipe he tore away at the rest of the outfit that was hanging off of Jude and watched as it collapsed completely.
Shreds of his clothing fluttered to the ground like the world's worst blotch of confetti.
Jude felt the cold air around his waist kick up. His eyes widened as a heavy realization hit him all at once.
He was in his undies.
He looked down and saw the color pink.
It was a bright pink elastic from the dorky My Little Pony briefs he was actually wearing! They had guessed correctly!
These briefs had been his since he was fourteen. They’d survived all the times he tried to move out and they continued to survive every encounter with every dastardly villain he’s come across.
It was always laundry day apparently.
It didn’t matter though because they were on full display now.
“AAAGHEIEIEEEEE~!” Jude’s eyes spun as he stuck out his tongue and clenched his teeth. “DUH! DUHOI! HURGH! DURR!” He made weird jerky motions and stupid funny wiggles. They were adorable and also really out there. Even for him. This must have been one really strong secret.
“NOOOO!” Jude finally screamed into the sky. “THESE AREN’T MINE! I’M ONLY WEARING THEM FOR A FRIEND!”
Everyone just stared at him.
“Whoa… I was right…” Headstrong said simply. He then thrust his bunny ear arm out and snagged the back of the exposed waistband.
“HUGH!” Jude was in mid-panic and feeling the massive tug on them didn’t do him any favors. He was going to die of embarrassment and these fiends were about to make it worse!
Headstrong tightened the grip. Jude gulped.
“Don’t…” He began.
Didn’t matter.
Headstrong yanked his briefs up his butt in a manner befitting an Olympic champion. What came out of Jude’s mouth was a high pitched shriek that could double as an audition for the opera.
“HAAAAIYEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~!”
Headstrong’s smile grew wider as he watched this wonderful show of displacement. What a wonderful show this was turning out to be.
“He’s squealing, Robbie! Like a dumb little piglet! Come on, dude, record this!” Headstrong said.
“I already am,” Wedgie Master held up his phone, shaking it about a little. “I’ve been recording the whole time. Even when I was wedging him. Jealous of how fast and stealthy I am?”
Hypno-Mouse dusted himself off and approached the other two after making some kind of preperation.
Wedgie Master leaned over and stared at Jude straight in the eyes.
“You know what time it is, don’t you Imp?”
Jude just stared back at him before going, “Wait… please-!”
The begging had begun. They loved to hear it. It never mattered of course. It was just all a part of the fun.
However, today felt special. It was time to escalate their bratty behavior to something new and permanently damaging. The panic that would ensue on Jude’s face, his REAL face, would be the most beautiful thing ever.
“Time to see what’s under that mask!”
The crowd got really excited when they heard that. This was new. Were they finally going to demolish this hero’s reputation in a way that was completely unrecoverable? People actually began gathering around in different ways, trying to get a better angle.
They wanted to know what this loser’s face looked like! Of course they did!
“No… no… NO! NO! NOOOO!” Jude felt his heart race and his brain send signals to his body that didn’t make any sense. He panicked and began clawing at his mask in a vain attempt to keep it attached to his face at all costs.
He was already a mess. You could probably even see the tears glistening under the mask. This was a big deal. The biggest deal ever actually!
“Come on,” Wedgie Master said. “What could you be hiding that we don’t already know? That you’re a whining little crybaby who wets his My Little Pony briefs when he thinks about how much the Brat Pack is gonna beat him up the next day?”
“I-I’m n-not…” Jude began.
“You’re literally leaking right now!” Headstrong accused.
Jude gasped and looked down at his briefs.
“I meant your eyes, doofus,” Headstrong snickered. “I can see the wetness under the mask. Good to know you’re also aware of your wetting issues though.”
Jude blushed and his eye twitched.
This couldn’t be happening. He wasn’t about to face the absolute worst fear of his entire life like this was he? Come on now. Crying? He wasn’t crying! It was eye sweat…! F-From… fear!
Oh God! NO!
His wedgie was deepened at that moment. Jude let out a little shriek yet again.
“PLEASE! Wait! Don’t do this! I promise to be good! I’ll be a good little undie wetter and never bother you ever again! I-I’ll even pay for your heists or whatever it is you do! Yeah!” Jude said.
“That doesn’t even make any sense,” Hypno-Mouse said with an amused look on his face.
“I-It could make sense though! Whatever you guys need I’m on it! HEY! NO! STOP! GET AWAY! STOOOOOOP!”
His masked was grabbed and pulled at by Headstrong.
“You hear something, Hypno?” Wedgie Master asked, leaning over towards his fellow brat.
“Nope,” Hypno shook his head. “Just little wailing sissy baby noises.”
They kept pulling. They were going agonizingly slow though. It was as if time itself had stopped completely.
“LAST CHANCE!” Jude shouted in the most threatening voice he could, all of a sudden.
The three of them stared at him.
…For what?” They asked.
Welp. It was worth a shot.
They had themselves a wonderful little laugh together before the mask was whisked away from Jude’s face completely!
The wind smacked into his maw like an uppercut from the universe. It was like he was naked.
Which he almost was but an unmasking was somehow worse! It was like his very soul was stripped bare and exposed for the entire world to see!
There he was. Judeth Jades in the flesh. His purple face, pointed ears, white muzzle, and green eyes were openly exposed for the unsympathetic onlookers before him.
That’s ironically when he heard it. There was the sound of a crinkle and it was located directly beneath him.
Jude made a doofy “DUUUH!” noise as he glanced down and saw a huge white diaper, unfolded and ready for his butt to flop onto.
When did it get there? He didn’t know but the answer was that it was Hypno-Mouse’s doing. He was busy preparing Jude’s baby supplies while he was in the middle of panicking his dignity away.
“Aww, look at him wiggle,” Headstrong snickered as he pulled away the removed mask.
Jude gasped, blushed and wiggled more as he saw his mask, nay, his salvation, extend out of reach!
“GUH!” was all he could say. He wanted to shout to the high Heavens that he was indeed a real hero but… who would believe him now? He looked like such a loser!
Wedgie Master reeled his head back with a laugh and pretended to be surprised.
“WHUH-OH! THE HERO HAS BEEN UNMASKED!”
With a follow-up to rival this outburst, Headstrong blurted out for the sake of transparency, “THERE’S A DIAPER LOSER UNDERNEATH!”
Here he was. The Infectious Imp. He was being wedgied by some brats in his MLP briefs while unmasked, panicked, and dangling over an unfolded diaper.
Smartphone flashes went off as the crowd’s hum grew even more.
The little girl who this guy had just rescued from a bin earlier stared at him and narrowed her eyes into something completely disgusted. She let out a breathy sigh.
“Lame.”
END OF ISSUE #1.
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