Swiftly abandoning those pure black screens provoking no thought, the commercial opens to an Espurr toddling to the kitchen while pianos methodically play their melodies. Soon standing right in front of the refrigerator, this curious cat’s in no need of a snack, however, for fridge magnets of his ABC’s are ample food for thought.
CLINK! CLINK! CLINK!
While sporting simple attire of blue t-shirts and plain diapers, the Psychic-type pursues what’s quite complex to typical tots and starts arranging the attached letters, showing skills even those big kids in kindergarten have yet to master as he makes the word “cat” from colored magnets.
“Hehehe! Yay yay yay!”
The shot then fully focuses on the literate little one smiling and clapping his hands, satisfied by how this successfully spelled word ties to his Meowstic mommy and daddy. With so much cerebral activity already, it’s no surprise a sweet voice soon comments on this smart cookie.
“It’s not rocket science that Psychic-types are avid learners! Even the littlest ones have lots on their mind!”
However, sudden shifts swiftly pose a problem as the toddler’s tense face shows only a single thing on his mind, a different three letter word with double vowels and much to do with bowels.
“But when that familiar feeling finally hits, even the most cerebral tots can only focus on filling their diapers!” the narrator adds with a chuckle.
Poopy pursuits are then prioritized as the Espurr looks away from the letters on the fridge and sudden squats disrupt this spelling showcase with a pop quiz on numbers, prompting the speaker to follow up before the tot takes a dump in his diaper.
“Although, this creates quite the conundrum for Psychic-type tots, does it not? When those baby brainiacs gotta do their business, they’re losing time to learn when they’re busy making boom boom.”
“Mmmph!”
BRAAAAAAAAAP!!!
With his diaper still yet to be filled following the first grunt, with solely preludes to poo poo proceeding that push, the speaker’s hypothesis is already proven as precious time also passes.
“Mmmmmmph!”
PLOP…PLOP…PLOP
Methods of mess making then commence as his diaper starts to droop, but with second grunts costing more seconds, time’s a wastin’ amidst all this waste! Certainly, the Espurr would rather have loads to learn than loads to dump, but alas the baby can’t have it both ways with body and mind.
“Nnnnnnnngh!”
Not done pooping his pampers as persistent pushies push pedagogies aside, such grunts make more seconds go by for the boy who’s gotta go, for not even the petit Psychic-type can predict those potent pressures.
SLUUUUUUUMP!!!
Determined to do the dirty deed nonetheless, rather than his knowledge expanding, it’s his diaper that does just that as a hefty mound makes it sag down to his feet, and so the time the toddler could have committed to training his brain has simply proved he’s not potty trained.
“Aaaah…”
Although spelling can resume now that no pressure remains, the feline’s focus is now drawn to full diapers instead of fridge magnets. Yes, even for the Espurr embodying mind over matter, at this moment all that matters is that he’s let out all messy matter, and who can blame the little boy when he had lots to unload? Cracking a dopey smile and letting his body relax while relief washes over him, the shot staying on his rancid results soon lets the speaker reach their conclusion.
“If regular diapers aren’t didactic, then we can do much better for these brainy babies.” the speaker states while xylophones keep prompting the pondering of possibilities. “So, we’ve developed something with those mindful fellas in mind!”
With that, pianos add more peppiness to the program’s musical number as the next scene shifts to a living room setting and shows the Espurr sporting new pampers, now with numbers on the outside instead of the inside.
“Introducing Mindful Messers, the diaper designed for Psychic-types!” the speaker concisely states.
The boy then looks down at his newly designed diaper with a wide smile, loving the addition of single digit numbers that remind him ABC’s and 123’s are an amazing sum of knowledge.
“No doubt this mini mathematician adores all those numbers, but appealing designs aren’t the only thing this kid can count on!” the speaker enthusiastically states. “With their interactive and educational functions, these diapers do lots for your little learners!”
Drawn to the highest number he knows, the toddler shows said functions as he taps the “3” on his diaper, causing that orange number to light up while a playful high pitched voice sounds it out.
“Hehehehe!”
Happily giggling and clapping his hands, it’s no surprise he holds the number higher than his age in such high regard!
“Hehehe…..huh?”
But, before the number three can further fill him with glee, a blinking number four shows such smarty pamps have even more in store. Although a tad unfortunate the tot lacks the foresight to forge an idea about that purple digit on his diaper, unless one has forgivably forgotten Psychic-types are quite the curious kids, it’s foretold he’ll give that number a tap regardless.
“Four!” the synthetic voice says once his digit taps that digit.
Quickly able to put two and two together, concluding that four must be what follows three, the Espurr’s widening smile follows the widening of his knowledge base.
“Yay! Yay!…..Oh!”
Although, amidst his newfound fondness of that unforgettable number four, a feeling neither foreign nor foreseeable, a particular twinge diaper-clad kids would forsake him for if he were to forgo it, forcefully forbids focus on those other numbered forms. While nothing short of commendable to know what comes after three, for now he can forget about fortifying his number knowledge, because most importantly, it’s time to pee!
PSSSSSSSSSSHHH!!!
And so, as captivating as counting higher is, what’s down below tells the boy to count backwards as he goes number one. But, as the speaker swiftly suggests amidst this soaking, bodily waste won’t be the only addition to his diaper.
“So often do diapers follow that rule of ‘fade when wet’, but not these ones! With Mindful Messers, rather than making fun patterns fade, wetness makes educational concepts all the clearer!”
PSSSSSSSSSSHHH!!!
The camera zooming in on the Espurr’s diaper while it sags, stains, and swells, another addition makes claims and close ups come together as colored addition and subtraction symbols start appearing between the numbers on that soaked pair of padding.
“Phew……Oooh!”
Following a dopey sigh of relief, his focus swiftly returns upon seeing sums beyond pee pee and pampers. So bewildered that his bladder has produced such pairings of symbols and numbers, of course sogginess and squishiness doesn’t quell the kid’s curiosity as he places a hand on one of the problems.
“1 + 2 = 3” the synthetic voice promptly states.
The Espurr gives a round of applause from this arithmetic revelation, feeling like the existence of addition has exponentially increased his intellect. Although, just like the math problems on his padding, so too does the program know it’s only providing part of the equation.
“We’ve shown lots of numbers and letters, but we also know those aren’t the only things your little ones love to learn about!” the speaker says before another scenic shift occurs.
The makers of Mindful Messers then prove that they’re more than mindful of different subjects and demographics as the Espurr’s older sibling makes their appearance, a three year old Gothorita girl sporting a pink shirt and skirt alongside pampers with shapes as their patterns.
“Triangle! Rectangle! Square!”
Showing she’s just as eager to learn as her little brother, that synthetic voice sounds out a series of shapes while she happily taps the designs on her diaper, so satisfied by the slightly more complex subjects of simple geometry. But, with the subject soon circling back to bodily waste, numbers and equations also make their return as the speaker then talks of number two.
“Oh, but how could we name our diapers Mindful Messers without making messing a part of the solution?” they say with a chuckle. “That’s right! For these cerebral Psychic-types, even pooping their pants has a pedagogical purpose!”
“Ngggh….”
PFFFFFFFFT!! BRAAAAAAAAAP!!!
Before the girl can further shape her knowledge of shapes, emphasis on such sided structures must now be set aside for what’s about to come out on her other side as boisterous bowels show that she’s gotta poopy pretty badly, that this is shaping up to be a mess squarely of the big and hefty kind. Rectangles and triangles may have been the first figures to catch her attention, but sudden squats and grunts show the Gothorita certainly didn’t forget about the circular shapes.
“Mmmmmmmph!”
SLUUUUUUUUUUUMP!!!
The toddler takes a high diameter dump in her diaper as she drops a solid with quite the circumference, causing her pampers to have a much poopier perimeter while significant sag and large lumps radically increase their radius. Although it’s not a revelation to realize what she did in her diaper definitely reeks, what could be considered such is that the speaker was right all along about Eureka moments manifesting from this mess.
“All squares are rectangles, but not all rectangles are squares!” the synthetic voice then says, showing her dumpy deposit isn’t the only thing to be dispensed.
With fun facts following the fact she filled her diaper, loads and flatulence lead to anything but brain farts. The baby brother, unbothered by her big sister’s big stinky, gives such poopies a round of applause for the solid insight such solids produced. The three year old, along with feeling relaxed and relieved, is enlightened by the info dump from her dump as a wide smile forms on her face. Showing said satisfaction extends beyond the youngsters of the family, the shot then zooms out to capture the caretakers alluded to since that first word on the fridge, the Meowstic parents who aren’t phased by their son’s soaked pampers and even less bothered by their daughter’s dumpy diaper since poopies provided a principle they hadn’t learned since grade school. As the stinky and soggy Psychic-types are scooped up by Mommy and Daddy, full diapers are paired with a family full of smiles, for while pails piled with packed pampers prove neither little boy nor bigger girl boast potty training prowess, so too do they show smarts independent from diaper dependence.
Heading into the commercial’s concluding scene after both children have gotten changed, the disposing of diapers comes the near indispensable knowledge they offer. Final shots now focus on the boy and girl’s gleeful faces as they toddle back to the living room, and with their new diapers not only bringing about the boons of clean bottoms and powdered pampers, but more subjects to learn and love, why wouldn’t brother and sister be so happy? The Espurr makes another shift between his ABC’s and 123’s while wearing a diaper whose designs are abundant with the alphabet, and now fridge magnets won’t be the only fun way he can play with letters and words. The Gothorita’s diaper still centers around shapes, but those of the more cutesy and complex kind as flower patterns show she’ll learn of plants like petunias and chrysanthemums now that the subject of botany is represented on her bottom. Finishing off this wholesome shot are Mommy and Daddy smiling in the distance, their contentment uncompromised whether diapers are spotless or drastically dirtied by doo doo so long as son and daughter keep learning about this big and beautiful world.
“Mindful Messers. The best pants for your smarty pants!” the speaker says as the brand and slogan show up in purple font, followed by the shot fading to black a few seconds later.
End