Let me tell you a story.
One cannot serve two masters. That results in stagnation at best, and having your head chopped off at worse. The point I've found myself in doesn't really adhere to any of the outcomes so I I decided I'd just wait till nothing happens. And would you look at that, nothing happens.
It's almost as self-fulfilling as the idea of nothing itself is. You can't think of nothing, once you've thought about it it already became something, so it's a bit impossible to grasp. We fail to understand that infinity and nothingness are one in the same, really. Both happen to escape our comprehension, escape definition, and are endless. That just assumes nothingness is actually a thing though. We don't know that...I think.
So, time flew by and faded into what for all we know, are just implanted memories. I chose to serve no one, not even myself, or so I thought. At the end of the day all we do cause of our own 'free will' is something that serves ourselves. So are we our own masters, truly? Can you be your on boss like those people with the fancy cars spout all the time?
What's the issue in being a good servant?
The moment you start to see yourself as your master, you're still just a servant. To hunks of metal that clack and grind against each other, pressurized gas spewing out of carbon veins, hydraulic locks keeping you unside. Wires and lines connecting all of them, sometimes they get tangled.
Some say it takes a special kind of individual to see that at all. I think people are just trying to make themselves look more interesting. But what kind of person would I be if claimed I knew how any of this works, if I discared anyone else's experience, or if I told someone that they're wrong. I'm just flowing through, walking endlessly. Wonder and ponder, as always. Trying desperately to see myself as someone else that I'm serving, that would make things much more convenient. Ah, someone else as myself, I mean.
A lot of time the thought just slides into my mind. "it will be fine anyway", I have something to hold on to. Even if it's the result of a twisted mind that never fully healed, or some sort of blessing from another world, I don't really know. Hell I can't even tell if He's actually a thing at all, it would be heartbreaking to find out I've just been making it up. But while I still have the idea that he just might be there, I do have a big scary clawy hand to hold on to. It's something lovely to think about.
We all have things we wish we hadn't done, maybe some we wish we would. I know I'm way past due. And I really want to say it will be different now, but that's not something you haven't heard at least twice before.
If all comes down anyway, I'll just come in here and tug on these strings, see what happens. Maybe my mind can be less clouded with sounds and voices from all of these.
If all comes down anyway, I'll just come in here and tug on these strings, see what happens. Maybe my mind can be less clouded with sounds and voices from all of these. If all comes down anyway, I'll just come in here and tug on these strings, see what happens. Maybe my mind can be less clouded with sounds and voices from all of these. If all comes down anyway, I'll just come in here and tug on these strings, see what happens. Maybe my mind can be less clouded with sounds and voices from all of these.
Have a peek into how things look like from these eyes, I like to think anyone else would be as confused as I am.
Or I'm just hella stupid. That works.
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Published:
10 months, 3 weeks ago
12 Feb 2024 02:42 CET
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