Coming Clean by Pent Ghelsburg
Disclaimer: The characters depicted in this work are purely fictional. Any resemblance to persons alive or dead is purely coincidental. They are the original and rightful intellectual property of their creators. I use them with permission and respect. This work involves underaged characters. You have been warned.
A little more than a month had passed since Xavier and Pent had hung out. The chipmunk had withdrawn a bit back into his circle of friends. The teammates of lacrosse had welcomed him back into their circle without much protest. After all, they needed to keep him in good graces since he was the best player. He didn't hang out with Pent, almost at all. A fact that remained in the back of the white cub's mind.
Yet as docile as Pent was, the matter began to weigh on his mind. He was afraid to approach Xavier now. Each time he did so, the other boy was with one of the other team members of the lacrosse squad. Pent had been passively warned by the body language of the team that they didn't want him around. It was an issue that he wasn't entirely prepared to deal with on his own. Even still the club clung onto hope, occasionally rubbing the medallion he had bought.
Samaliel hadn't confronted the issue either. His brother was very much reserved when it came to his feelings. Simply shutting himself down and digging into whatever book sparked his interest. He hadn't had someone to read within some time. Even Santiago had seemingly stopped talking to him now. Pent began to feel incredibly alone again. The certainty of his situation remained a constant in his mind.
Midterms were right around the corner and with it, the prospect of the winter break was very real. Many students were already planning what they would do over it. Hockey season had finally picked up, so Pent was busy with that now to occupy himself. A fact that very few knew about him since the hockey gear shielded his otherwise thin frame. Only Samaliel knew the breadth of the older cub's athleticism. Humbleness was something that Pent took a bit too far.
One morning, Pent was going through his usual routine before school. He was out front of the building for a change. The fresh powder of snow didn't bother him. His thick fur and jacket offered him more than enough protection from the elements. Most of the other kids had turned in inside. But for Pent, he preferred silence. Solitude to him was a constant source of security and it was something he took solace in.
He was sitting underneath one of the school trees. The snow flickered off the feeble leaves above and onto his book. He brushed it off his book, not wanting the pages to get damp. Continuing to read it as the content of solar singularity was something that intrigued him. Pent envisioned a world where fossil fuels were something of the past and hoped that the world would adopt the notion sooner rather than later.
"You're not cold out here?" Pent heard a voice he hadn't heard in quite a while.
Pent lifted his head from his book. "No."
"Are you mad at me?" The chipmunk shivered as he wasn't quite used to the cold weather yet.
The fox looked back down at his book. "You ignore me just like the rest of them."
"I take that as a yes…." Xavier felt guilty but he was going to try distancing himself from the lacrosse kids again.
Pent was entrenched in his book, not seeming to want to talk. "What do you want?"
"I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I know it's been a while but I'd like to hang out with you again…if you want?" The chipmunk wanted to make it up to the other boy.
The bigger boy cocked an eyebrow, suspecting it was more than that. "I don't know."
"Look…I know you're upset. I understand. I've been a jerk but…I want to make it up to you." The smaller boy got on his knees and tried pleading with the other cub.
Pent looked at him through the thin slit in the other boy's hood. "Prove it."
"Give me a chance and I will…I promise." Xavier felt guilty that he had misled the boy again.
The white fox got up from where he was sitting. "Alright."
"Cool…thanks. Can we go inside? It's really cold out here…" The chipmunk shivered a bit.
The bigger boy shrugged. "Sure, that's fine."
They walked together inside, though Pent kept a bit of distance from the other cub. Part of him still believed he was being misled again. After all…Xavier had been avoiding him for what seemed like forever. Once they were back in the building, the chipmunk stopped the other boy.
"Hey, Pent…do you have a study partner for midterms?" The boy knew Pent was smart and hoped he would help him out.
Pent frowned a bit. "Is that what this is about? You want help with Midterms?"
"No…I was thinking that maybe you would like to study with me instead of studying alone." Xavier shuffled his paws in place.
The white fox looked down and thought to himself. "I don't know, Xavier."
"Please, Pent? I can't afford to fail these classes. I suck at studying and I know your smart." The chipmunk was desperate and remembered all the academic awards Pent had in his room.
The white fox hesitated a moment, unsure how to respond.
"I will do anything you want. Heck…I will even pay you if you want. Just…please help me. I'm begging you." The smaller boy reached out and touched Pent's hands.
Pent sighed. "It's fine. I will help you. You don't need to give me anything."
"Oh thank you, Pent! Thank you! I promise you won't regret it." Xavier sighed deeply in relief.
The white fox kit had given in but still wasn't sure he should have. "It's cool. When did you want to study?"
"How about today…tomorrow…any day? I'm so far behind…" The brown-furred boy had neglected his studies for quite a while.
Pent murmured. "I'll try. I need to make sure my brother can take care of himself."
"That's fine…Let me know, okay?" Xavier was hopeful the other boy would come over more than once.
He nodded. "Yeah, okay."
"Thanks again, Pent. I appreciate it." The brown-furred boy waved and with that, he was gone.
Pent immediately started doubting his choice. Xavier had avoided him for months now and all of a sudden he was interested in being his friend again. It just all seemed too good to be true and far too convenient. He wondered what he should do. Part of him wanted to hang out with Xavier but the other part of him told him he was the same as every other person in the past.
Later that day, Pent was walking through the halls minding his own business. Traveling between Math and Science classes. Despite the weather being pouring, many of the doors had been left unlocked. As such many of the kids were horsing around and collecting snow and putting it inside. The heat from the inside wasn't enough to melt it immediately and a small pile had built up near the door.
Pent passed by it, uninterested in the fact that snow was there. He had seen more than enough snow in his life that it didn't spark his interest anymore. Some of the members of the lacrosse team had found their way to the door. They had been waiting for the white fox. They were tired of him hanging around with Xavier, even if it hadn't happened for a while. One of them threw a snowball at the cub.
The boy felt the snowball hit the side of his face. The slushy ball of snow didn't hurt much. It was more surprising than anything else. The fox guarded himself from a few more snowballs before moving on. They continued to follow him down the hall, insistent on giving him a hard time. Pent picked up the pace before he found himself cornered. Two of them looked at the cornered pup who appeared to be helpless, at least to them.
"Stop bothering him, or I'll have you two kicked off the team." Xavier had caught them in the act and stopped them cold.
Seeing Xavier stand up for him made Pent billow with pride and happiness. His heart stuttered to flutter again, beating fast. His stomach stirred with butterflies.
They looked behind them, the chipmunk staring them down. "What's gotten into you? I thought you were done with this twerp?"
"Buzz off. I'm not looking to fight with you." The chipmunk crossed his arms defensively.
The two looked at him, knowing they outnumbered him. "And what are you going to do about it?"
"I already told you. I'm not fighting you….now beat it before I call a teacher over." The rodent stood defiantly behind them not seeming willing to budge.
They considered their next action, shoving him as they went past him. "This isn't over…nerd!"
"You…stood up for me?" Pent wasn't sure what he just witnessed.
Xavier scratched the back of his head. "Yeah, I guess I did. Are you okay?"
"Yeah…they just threw some snowballs at me." The fox's skin under his fur was a little red from it.
The chipmunk looked ashamed. "Sorry, I shouldn't have let this go on as long as it has."
"What do you mean?" Pent approached the other boy.
The smaller cub murmured. "They've never been okay with me hanging out with you. They keep telling me it will make me a nerd."
"I don't think you're a nerd…" The white fox tried to reassure the other cub.
Xavier nodded. "I know but…that's not what they think…I guess."
"Why do you care what they think? Are they your friends?" Pent was used to being entirely alone and didn't give much thought to what people thought of him.
The brown-furred boy shook his head, the boy's words making him recall his father's. "No, I guess not. They are just on the lacrosse team with me."
"So…don't worry about it then. They are just jerks." The bigger boy touched his friend's shoulder, trying to reassure him.
Xavier forced a smile and the two returned to class. The two members of the lacrosse team remained out of Pent's hair for the time being. Not even during lunch did he encounter them again. It was a change that the fox wholly welcomed. It wasn't until the end of the day until the two friends saw each other again. The chipmunk made sure to wait out front as he often did. He saw that some of the members of the lacrosse team were eyeing him from afar.
Sasha appeared from within the group. She was one of the many groupies the lacrosse team had. The girl smirked at him before flicking and sashaying off. Little did he realize that she was the one that had been behind most of his problems. Having
brought up the issue to her previously, she had started the rumor that he was hanging out with her more often than not. The chipmunk eyed her warily as she approached him.
"Don't talk to me anymore, Xae. I'm not interested in a nerd like you." She said as she sashayed right past him.
The comment hit low, especially because he considered her a friend. It appeared she wasn't interested in that anymore. A gut feeling of disappointment filled him. He'd always been romantically interested in her. Yet it had never amounted to much. He tried to bottle up his feelings as he stood around waiting for Pent. He kept an eye on the lacrosse team in case they tried to do something stupid.
Pent showed up before long near the end of the crowd. The white fox smiled widely as he saw Xavier. His tail wagging evidently behind him as he approached.
"Hey, dude. You ready to go to my place?" Xavier asked as he looked over at the lacrosse team who kept a close eye on them.
Pent nodded and put his back over his shoulders. "Yeah, are your parents picking us up?"
"Uh-huh. I don't bike in the winter. Come on…" Xavier put his arm behind Pent.
"Nerds!" The lacrosse team cackled at them as they passed by.
"Don't mind them, Pent. I am going to be joining a new lacrosse team next year. They are just upset I quit today." The chipmunk tried to get his friend to ignore the insult.
Pent looked at the smaller cub. "You quit Lacrosse today?"
"Yup, I am tired of them treating you like garbage. I am tired of them dictating who I want to be friends with." Xavier felt much more alone than usual but he felt more connected than Pent than anyone on the team.
The fox stopped in his tracks, his heart racing in his chest again. "Wow…I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything. I feel stupid for listening to them. They aren't my friends anyways. You are." The chipmunk led over towards the traffic loop where cars were picking up cubs.
It was a few minutes before Xavier's mother arrived to pick him up. She had not been told that Pent coming over quite yet and was surprised to see him standing next to her son. She rolled down the window despite the snow coming down.
"Hi, Mom! Can Pent come over today to help me study?" He asked, ever hopeful she would agree.
She seemed surprised. "You…want to study? Of course…as long as it's okay with his parents."
"Did you ask if you could come over?" Xavier asked the other boy to be certain.
Pent nodded. "Yeah, she doesn't care…"
"Cool…come on, Pent. Thanks, Mom!" The smaller cub padded into the car before pushing himself over to make room for Pent.
The white fox proceeded inside, not bothering to keep space between them. Instead of sitting right next to the other cub. Xavier didn't seem to mind it. The car started before long. Pent crossed his hands nervously in his lap. The chipmunk couldn't help but notice the nervous look on his friend's face.
"What's wrong?" He asked rather publicly, not worried about his mother's hearing.
Pent stammered thinking that it would go as poorly as before. "I've…never been over anyone else's house before for a long time…"
"Don't worry, we don't bite." The woman exclaimed as she chuckled.
The chipmunk nodded. "Yeah don't worry…it will be chill. I promise."
Yet Pent remained pretty uptight. His legs were tightly woven together. It was apparent he was still uncomfortable. Xavier had been watching him to make sure he was okay. Reaching over to grab his friend's paw and placing them between his own. Immediately Pent's heart started to beat faster.
"Try to relax…okay?" Xavier wasn't sure how else to help him.
The bigger boy stammered as he looked at his hands. "O-okay."
Pent felt his hands being enclosed by the other cub. It gave him a strange sense of warmth and made butterflies stir in his stomach. He gripped his hand as if to tighten around the other cubs. Almost as if…holding hands with his friend. He eased back in his chair, still clutching his friend's hand. Xavier not seeming bothered by it since Pent seemed to be more relaxed.
The two remained that way for the remainder until they arrived at Xavier's place. Unlike Pent, the chipmunk had a fairly large home. They could see it from the car, even before they got out of it.
"Come on, Pent. We're here." Xavier got up and broke up their little session of touching hands.
Pent got out of the car on his own, looking in front of him. The snow had died down a bit so he was able to see what lay before him. A two-story building with a chimney stack billowing out smoke. Xavier pushed him along and then proceeded to walk next to him, following the sidewalk to the front door. They waited for the boy's mother to let them inside. Her son hadn't been given a key just yet as she didn't quite trust him.
"Xavier, can I talk to you for a second?" She requested before the boy darted inside.
The chipmunk nodded to his mother. "Yeah, mom. Pent…my room is upstairs. You can't miss it. It's the only one with a bed."
"Take your shoes off, hon." The woman reminded Pent who was still starstruck by the sheer size of the building.
The white fox did as he was told and stomped off the snow from his boots into the plastic mat. He then proceeded towards the back of the home as he assumed that was where the stairs were.
Xavier looked up at his mom expectantly. "So what's up Mom?"
"I think that was a very nice thing you did back in the car." The woman smiled widely.
The chipmunk looked down as if ashamed of himself. "Oh…you saw that?'
"Yes, I did. You are very sweet. Your little friend is definitely out of his comfort zone…so take it easy on him, okay?" She warned him as she picked up on Pent's somewhat antisocial nature.
The cub smiled meekly. "Thanks, Mom. I will do my best to make him feel comfortable….I'm going to ask him to be my best friend."
"Oh, yeah? Good luck. I hope he says yes. You two seem to get along." She was glad her son finally had someone over for a change.
Xavier kicked off his shoes before darting away. "Thanks, Mom."
Pent had found his way to Xavier's room. The chipmunk's room was much larger than his own. Several bookshelves lined the walls but instead of books, they were lined with trophies. On the wall were several posters with various lacrosse posters and a few pictures of the boy at different stages of his life. A small computer desk was shoved in the corner with an equally small office chair.
"I see you found my room. What do you think?" The chipmunk asked from behind the other boy.
The bigger boy looked behind him. "It's really…big. You have so many trophies."
"I've been playing lacrosse a long time. We've won quite a bit, I suppose." The chipmunk tried to be humble about his skill.
Pent continued to look around at the decorations. He recognized very little except a singular poster of a superhero he was familiar with.
"You like Rocket Raccoon?" He asked as he approached it and saw it was signed by the actor who starred in the movie.
Xavier panned over to his bed and slid his bag off his back. "Yeah, I met the guy who acted him last year at a convention."
"That's cool. I've never met anyone famous before." Pent looked at the boy's bed which was much bigger than his own.
The chipmunk pulled off his jacket and put it on a rack he had in his room. "Go ahead and make yourself comfortable."
Pent followed the instructions and took off his coat before hanging it on the same rack. "So…what did you want help with?"
"Well…I am terrible at math and science. Are you any good at them?" The chipmunk asked as he pulled out some of the work that had been graded.
The fox shrugged. "I can probably help you with it."
"Come sit with me on my bed…my desk isn't big enough for both of us." Xavier suggested, trying to make the other cub more comfortable.
The white cub hesitated a moment. "You're bed…?"
"Yeah? Are you alright with that?" The chipmunk wanted to make sure the other boy wasn't feeling uneasy.
Pent shook his head. "I'm okay…just wasn't expecting that I guess."
"So come on…I promise it's comfy." The smaller boy patted the spot next to him.
The white fox took off his bag and approached the bed before easing himself onto it alongside the other boy. He found he more than easily found he could sit on it with the other cub. After all, neither of them was that big and the bed was much larger than what Pent was used to.
"So…this is what I'm talking about." Xavier showed Pent the math assignments he'd been working on the past few weeks.
Pent looked at it. The equations in question were a few levels below his understanding of math. Quadratics and graphing…something Pent had mastered years ago. He was careful to not say anything out loud. He didn't want to discourage the boy.
"Here…let me show you." Pent took a pencil from his friend and began working on some of the problems that his friend had gotten wrong.
The brown-furred boy watched as his friend knocked out the problems within seconds. Showing no signs of any difficulty.
"Wow…you're smart…haha. I couldn't figure this out and I sat trying to do it an hour the other night." The chipmunk blushed a bit.
Pent shrugged. "Do you understand?"
"I think so. Can you show me one more time?" Xavier wanted to be sure he got it.
The bigger cub went through the process again, this time showing him a trick. One to make it even easier than it already is.
"That's crazy…I can't believe that worked." The smaller cub scratched his head in disbelief.
Pent eased back against the wall. "It's math…there are tricks for everything. What else did you need help with?"
"Uh…how about Science?" The chipmunk reached into his bag and pulled out the book they used in class.
The fox looked at it and recognized the cover from a few years ago. "Earth Science? No problem."
The brown-furred boy turned to the page that went over plate tectonics and the shifting of the continents.
It displayed yet another concept that Xavier didn't quite understand. How the shifting of the continents created the divergent plate boundary. Pent looked at the diagram. It was a poorly designed feature of the book, one that didn't very well show the relationship between the crust, plate, and asthenosphere of the planet.
"So…essentially you need to focus on the rising of the asthenosphere. As it rises it causes earthquakes that cause the cruse to rupture. This rupture allows the melted asthenosphere to rise as magma, creating the core of volcanism." Pent explained it in a way that made sense to him.
Xavier seemed confused. "Um…right."
"Doesn't make sense? How about if you think of it like cake? You have several layers of the cake. When the yeast is not yet prepared, it causes the cake to rise…but if there is too much yeast then it spills over. But instead of frosting coming out you have magma…" Pent tried a dumbed-down version of his explanation.
A light went on over the other cub's head. "Oh…I get it… haha. Good analogy."
"Thanks, I sorta just came up with it." The bigger boy didn't make a big deal about it.
The two continued to study together until Xavier's mother called them down for dinner. They had lost track of time and Pent knew he had to get home soon. He had been enjoying himself so much that he forgot about Samaliel. At the dinner table, Pent was greeted by both of Xavier's parents. The mother whom he'd met earlier and his father who looked like an older version of the boy himself.
The boys sat together and were served a rather large meal. They were unaware that Pent was mostly vegetarian and surprised when he turned down meat. Still, they were more than happy to accommodate him. Pent was more than happy to share food with his friend who seemed just as happy as he was to have him around. The fox and his friend couldn't have been happier and Xavier was glad that his friend came over.
After the meal was over, Pent asked if they could take him home. Xavier was disappointed he wasn't staying longer but knew he had to get home to his younger brother. The fox collected his things as Xavier waited by the front door with his mother. She had never seen her son like this before. It wasn't like him to be friendly around people, especially other boys. The woman couldn't help but smile at him.
Just as Pent was about to leave with his mother, Xavier stopped him.
"Thanks for helping me study, dude. I appreciate it." The chipmunk wanted him to know how thankful he was.
The white fox's tail wagged behind him. "No problem. Thanks for inviting me."
"Hey, Pent…I was wondering…" The boy stopped short of finishing his sentence.
His mother patted him on the back as if goading him on. "Would you like to be my best friend?"
"You're best friend? Do you mean it?" A huge smile crept across the cub's face as heard the question asked.
Xavier nodded. "Yeah, do you wanna?"
"Xavier…I would love to be your best friend." Pent motioned forward and hugged the other cub, tears flowing through his eyes as the emotion overwhelmed him.
The chipmunk was caught off guard, but hearing the other boy sobbing made him hesitate a bit. "Are you okay?"
"I'm…just…so…happy." The arctic fox straightened himself up and wiped his eyes off the tears of joy.
The silence was shared between them for a few moments. "Come on, Pent. It's time to go home."
"See ya, Xae." He said with still teary eyes.
The chipmunk waved back. It was now the second time Pent had hugged him. He wasn't sure what to make of it. Still…he was glad he had said yes The small show of affection slipped into the back of his mind. The bigger boy got redressed before walking out back to the woman's car. The duration of the ride with her was silent. She wasn't a woman of many words. Unsure what to say to the cub.
She dropped him off at his home and wished him well. The woman told herself she'd have to have a little chat with Xavier later. Pent returned home to Samaliel who was surprised to see him so late. The younger fox had fended for himself again but since Pent hadn't said anything he was a bit concerned.
"Where have you been?" Samaliel asked him when his other brother entered the door.
Pent paused a moment. "Sorry, Sama. I forgot to tell you that Xavier asked me to help you study."
"Oh…you got to go to his house? Was it fun?" Immediately The salt and pepper boy wasn't nearly as concerned about it.
The white fox smiled "Yeah…he asked me to be his best friend."
"Oh, Pent. I'm so happy for you." Samaliel hugged his brother tightly.
Pent sniffled again. "Me too…"
"Aw…why are you crying?" The younger boy wasn't sure what had happened to cause that.
The white fox wiped his eyes. "I'm just so glad he asked me. I like him a lot."
"Me too, Pent…Me too.." The smaller cub walked his brother back to their room.
The remainder of the night went like normal for Pent. Tucking in his brother. Taking a shower and getting dressed for bed. Once again looking out at the window into the stars above. His hope renewed within him. Eager to start a new day…to see Xavier again. Thoughts of the other boy seeped into his mind as he sat there idly. He couldn't help but smile as he slipped into dreamland.
Back at Xavier's the chipmunk's mother had returned from dropping off Pent. She had already convinced herself to talk to him. A mother's intuition was always right and something seemed different about the little fox cub.
"Hey, hon. Are you still awake?" She made her way into his room.
The boy had just gotten into bed, rotating the necklace Pent had given him before in his paw "Yeah, mom. What's up."
"Got a few minutes to talk?" She asked as she pulled over a chair next to his large bed.
He sat up, expecting a lecture. "What did I do? Am I in trouble?"
"Oh no, hon. I just wanted to talk to you about that boy." She folded her legs one over the other.
Xavier had a concerned look on his face. "Pent? Did something happen?"
"Oh, no. I just thought you should know that I think what you did was very brave of you." The woman thought her son would never mature.
The chipmunk boy looked confused. "Brave of me? Why?"
"I mean he's like the polar opposite of you from what I see." She said it softly so as not to be rash about it.
The cub stammered. "Oh…"
"I suppose opposite's attract, huh? As long as you guys have fun together…that's all that matters." She leaned down and ruffled his head fur.
Xavier groaned. "Mom…"
"Good night, hon. Get some sleep. You have a long day tomorrow." She kissed him on the forehead and left his room.
The chipmunk boy turned around and looked up at the ceiling. He was glad that he'd asked Pent. The fox seemed so happy about it. Pent was like no one he'd ever met before. Xavier slipped under his covers and allowed himself to fall asleep.
Several weeks passed by and winter break became more of a reality for the cubs at both schools. Xavier had been distant from Pent again but the fox hadn't been too worried about it. He was still riding high from his promotion to best friend. It was something he took great pride in. Pent had been thinking about Xavier much more often now. Curiosity about him and thoughts about seeing him again.
One day at school, Pent decided to confront his thoughts. Confusion had gotten the better of him. He had no idea why he was thinking about the other boy so much. The cub had no understanding of his feelings. All he wanted was clarity. He had worked up the bravery to talk to someone about it and since he knew Samaliel was too young, he decided he would have to talk to his favorite teacher about it.
So that morning he arrived much earlier than normal. Samaliel didn't question it as it was far from the first time Pent had gone to school early. Besides, it was the week of midterms and he could have used that excuse if he was confronted about it. He had been talking to himself to brave himself up enough to talk about it. He had no one else in the world other than Samaliel and Xavier. He wasn't about to screw up his only friendship because of feelings he didn't understand.
Pent arrived at room 8A. Mr. Bernards's room. The old rat sometimes was tasked with taking over his class but was his teacher from last year. He lightly knocked on the door to make sure Bernard wasn't busy.
"You may enter at your peril." The rodent announced from inside the room.
The fox made his way inside. The immediate smell of something foul-filled the room. It was apparent he was working on something. Looking at the table the old rat was working on what appeared to be some chemical compounds on a system of a relay of tubes.
"Mr. Bernard. Have you got a minute?"Pent asked him without going much further than the entrance since he didn't have a lab coat on.
The rat peered through one of the larger vials. "Ah, Pent. My, boy. What ponders your curiosity this day?"
"I was wondering if maybe you'd talk to me about something personal since…I don't have parents to talk to." The cub was blunt and to the point.
Bernard straightened up seeming alarmed. "Personal? You aren't cooking up anything these days, my son?"
"Well, yes…but this isn't about that." Pent waited until he turned off the burners, the smell becoming a little less strong.
The rat walked around to his desk and sat down, propping up his feet on it. "Well…sit down, my boy. Out with it."
"Do you promise to keep it a secret? I don't want anyone to know." The fox was trusting the man with his secret.
The rodent tapped his fingers on the desk. "Of course, my child. So long as you haven't broken any rules."
"No…nothing like that. It's just that…I've been thinking a lot about a friend of mine and I'm confused about why I keep thinking about them."
The rat leaned forward on his desk. "I see and what kinds of thoughts are these?"
"Well…uh…I like to think about hugging them and holding their hand…and I had a
dream about kissing them." Pent blushed profusely.
The man hummed a bit. "I see and is this a friend of yours?"
"They are my best friend." Pent sat down on one of the tables.
The rat waved his finger at the cub. "Have you considered that you might have feelings for this person?"
"What do you mean?" The fox kit was entirely naïve as to what he was getting at.
Bernard made a heart outline with his fingers. "That you may be interested in them romantically."
"But…they…are a b…" Pent stopped short of finishing his statement.
The rodent finished it for him. "A boy? And why should that matter? You are normal all the same."
"But I don't want to feel this way about him, Mr. Bernard…" The fox sighed deeply.
Bernard got up from his chair and stood next to Pent. "Be that as it may, you are entitled to how you feel. Perhaps you should talk to him about it."
"I guess…I just dunno if I'm ready for that…" Pent looked up at the older male with a look of loss in his eyes.
The man smiled at his former student. "When you are ready, my child."
"Thanks, Mr. Bernard." The fox forced a smile.
The rodent gave him a thumbs up. "No problem. Anytime, Pent."
Pent made his exit from the room. Not feeling better about his predicament. He liked the idea of hanging around with Xavier but wasn't sure he wanted more. He thought about holding his hand again…of hugging him. The warmth he had felt back then re-filled his body with warmth. He tried to snap himself out of it but the image of the other cub remained. He decided to go to the bathroom to wash his face to rid himself of the thoughts.
"Hey, Pent." Xavier almost ran right into the other cub.
Pent's heart was beating fast in his chest as he stuttered. "H-hey… X-Xavier."
"How are you?" The chipmunk asked as he was trying to be friendly to the other cub.
The fox looked around for a quick exit. "I-i…n-need…b…bathroom."
With that, Pent darted away. The chipmunk thought he was acting strange but didn't think much of it. After all, he knew the call of nature could be a strong one sometimes. Still, he followed the cub to make sure he was okay. The white cub retreated into the boy's bathroom, washing his face in hopes of getting rid of his nerves. He was breathing fast, he didn't know why. The fact he had come clean to Bernard didn't help the situation.
The fox remained within until the first bell. No one else went in so Xavier yelled inside.
"Are you feeling okay?" Xavier was certain something was up.
Pent murmured trying to speak. "S-sick!" He faked the sound of himself gagging.
"Do you want me to get the nurse?" The cub wanted to make sure his friend was taken care of.
The fox continued to stammer. "N-no.."
"Okay…let me know if you need anything…" The chipmunk departed from the bathroom, trusting his friend was alright.
Pent took a deep breath, glad the other boy had left. His heart was still racing rather fast in his chest. He wanted very badly for things to go back to normal. Why was he having these thoughts…he continued to beat himself up. The fox managed to make it to class just in time. The rigors of academia returned much of his disposition. The distraction from earlier had seemingly passed.
In literacy, they were starting a romance novel. The teacher had given them the assignment of writing one of their own. Pent had never written anything before…at least fictional. Yet his mind was already whirling with possibilities. A story about two boys…of whom were best friends. A chipmunk and an Arctic fox. The arctic fox wanted nothing more than to be romantic with the other cub but the other boy wanting nothing to do with it.
Pent finished the short story, coming up with a rather sad ending circling the Arctic fox being turned down. Pent had to convince himself that it wasn't about…them. When he was done he scribbled a bit. The drawing resembles a small heart. Xavier's name was in the middle of it but soon he erased it. He crumpled up the story before turning it in.
The teacher looked at the paper. It wasn't like the fox to not take pride in his work. She unwrinkled the paper and began to read it. The story was short enough that she finished it in very short order. The characters seemed to hit very close to home, having a very good feeling that the Arctic fox was Pent himself. It was then she understood…the boy was lovestruck. The drawing on the paper confirmed as much.
The class was dismissed and she stepped him to the side to speak to him.
"Mr. Ghelsburg…Can I have a word?" She asked him with her arms folded expectantly.
Pent slowed down as he was called over. "Yeah? Sorry, I crumpled up my work."
"No. It's fine. It was a rather good story. Though it was a sad ending." The woman tried to make him feel better.
The fox looked up. "Really?"
"Yes, though I think the little Arctic fox boy in the story was you. Am I correct, Mr Ghelsburg?" She asked as she was certain it was the case.
Pent shook his head. "N-no…what makes you think that?"
"Because of the little drawing. I bet that chipmunk boy is Xavier. Isn't it?" She had a knack for these sorts of things.
The cub stammered. "No…"
"Uh-huh, sure…I think you have a crush and you're afraid to admit it." The woman winked at him.
Pent stamped his foot. "I don't have a crush…I swear…"
"Whatever you say, Mr. Ghelsburg…Go on and get to your next class." The teacher pushed him onto the next class.
The white fox snorted and she chuckled at him. She knew all too well what was going on, even if he didn't admit it. She couldn't help but feel bad for him. Certain that Xavier was well out of his ballpark. It wasn't until lunch that Pent had to confront the issue again. Math and Science were much more low-key for him as he was much more careful about what he did. However, he decided he would talk to Santiago about it. He needed peer advice and the squirrel was the only kid he trusted other than his best friend.
Pent arrived at the cafeteria. His mind was distracted by his thoughts. He had tried to shut out thinking about Xavier anymore than he already had. Every time he started to think about it, he quickly changed the subject to something else. Even reading books had become problematic for him. It was becoming more and more clear that Pent had a thing for the boy. The fox proceeded through the line of the cafeteria and grabbed himself some food.
He saw Xavier hanging out with some other girl now. He assumed that it was his girlfriend but of course, it was his negativity that told him that. Pent peered around and saw that Santiago was chilling by himself. He hoped that the older boy wouldn't mind having someone sit next to him. Pent approached him and poked him from behind. He hoped for advice for someone closer to his age.
"Hey, Santiago. Mind some company?" He asked, hoping it would be fine.
The squirrel nodded. "Of course not, Pent. How are you?"
"I could be better…I was kind of hoping we could talk about something." The white fox sat down next to the bigger boy.
The rodent continued to eat. "Sure, what's on your mind."
"Well…I think there is someone I like and I don't know what to do about it." Pent sighed as it had been frustrating for him.
The squirrel dropped his plastic silverware. "Really? What makes you think that?"
"I can't stop thinking about them. I keep thinking about holding their hands in mind and hugging them I even had a dream about them...." The smaller boy put his face in his hands.
Santiago touched the other boy's back. "It's okay. I know your feelings can be confusing. Did you talk to them about it yet?"
"I don't know if I should. They are my best friend and I don't know how they'd react." The cub began to play with his food.
The bigger boy hummed. "I suppose it's a boy then…?"
"Promise not to tell?" Pent stopped short of answering the question.
The squirrel nodded. "Of course not…who is it?"
"Xae…Xavier." The cub seemed ashamed of his feelings.
Santiago's eyes grew wide. "The star lacrosse player? You're one to aim high…"
"I didn't want to feel like this…what do I do?" The fox pleaded with the teen for help.
The teen held up a single finger. "First…I think you need to relax. It's perfectly normal to have feelings for someone you care about…boy or not."
He raised a second finger. "Second…I think you need to figure out what you want. Your feelings are important and you can't just ignore them."
He raised a third finger. "Third… I think you need to talk to him. The only way you're going to solve your problem is by talking it out. The worst he can say is he's not interested but at least you know then."
"But…what if he…" The fox was stopped mid-sentence.
He raised his fourth finger. "Finally. I think you need to stop worrying about what he might do. If he's you're friend then he won't care if you have feelings for him. He may even be flattered and take it as a compliment.
"Oh…okay.." Pent confided within himself.
Santiago smiled. "I know you're confused…but you took an important step in talking to me. Now…make the next big step and talk to him…that is once you know what you want."
Pent nodded. "I'll try…thanks…"
The two continued to eat with not many words between them. Pent was still slightly conflicted. He wasn't sure what he wanted. Did he want to be romantic with Xavier? The thought of holding his hands and hugging him appealed to the young fox. Xavier made him feel funny inside. The butterflies and warmth he experienced whenever his best friend was around were like nothing he'd dealt with before.
Pent left the lunch room before long and turned to gym class. He informed the coach that he wasn't feeling well and that he wanted to sit out of the activity today. The coach didn't question it since Pent never asked it before. Letting him do what he wanted on the bleachers. The cub was deep within his thoughts. Filled with consideration for himself and Xavier. Possibilities of what
could go wrong and….what could happen.
Pent began to scribble on a piece of paper. Not making much of anything. No design or shape took form. It was simply a waste of time to distract his mind. Yet his constant focus remained on what he wanted. His hand seemingly controlled itself, writing Xavier's name in all sorts of different ways. He crumpled the paper when it had become full. The fox had a bit of a headache, holding his hand to his forehead.
"You feeling any better?" A familiar voice asked him.
Pent stammered as he panicked. "X-Xavier?"
"Yeah, the coach said I could come to check on you." Xavier wiped his forehead with his shirt.
The fox kit muttered. "T-thanks…"
"Sorry if I smell bad…haha." The chipmunk reached down and took off the shirt he was wearing as he was overheated from the game they were playing in the class.
Pent stared in front of him. The sight of Xavier's furry chest in front of him. The cub began to feel funny again. He couldn't quite respond.
"Cat got your tongue?" Xavier didn't notice the other boy was staring at him.
The Arctic fox shook his head. "N-no…"
"You've been acting weird all day. Are you okay?" The chipmunk wasn't sure what was up with him.
Pent could see the necklace around the other cub's neck. He took a deep sigh. "C-can…w-we…g-go…s-somewhere…p-private?"
"Yeah, sure. I don't think that the coach would notice if I disappeared for a bit and she already knows your out today." Xavier waited for his friend to get up.
The white fox led him to an area behind some of the bleachers around the perimeter of the room. Making sure to go all the way to the corner, where he was certain they wouldn't be seen or heard.
"So…what's up? Why are we here?" The chipmunk was incredibly confused about what was going on.
Pent took a deep breath, convincing himself that he need to…no…wanted to do this. "I have…a secret to tell you."
The fox looked at the floor, his speech a little more fluid and concise.
"Okay? What is it?" Xavier figured it must have been important for Pent to be this far removed to tell him.
The bigger boy took another deep breath. "P-promise not to get mad?"
"Of, course Pent. You're my best friend." The chipmunk touched his friend's shoulder.
The small act of reassurance made Pent feel warm. It was all he needed to go forward with it.
"Xavier…I-I…I…think….I…I…I…like you." Pent's face turned blood red, easily visible through his white fur.
The chipmunk cocked an eyebrow. "Of course you like me, we're friends. Why is that a secret?"
Xavier looked at Pent. His gaze was entirely focused on the floor. His red fused face. His nervous disposition. The fact he had been acting weird towards him. It all began to piece together in his mind.
"Oh…Pent…I…." The boy was dumbstruck and at a loss for words.
Pent turned around as if he was ashamed. "I-I...I'm sorry."
"Pent…I…" Xavier had no idea how to respond.
The emotion was bottling up inside Pent. Unsure of how to deal with it, he started to walk away. Certain that Xavier hated him now. He cried, sniffling and convincing himself that his friendship was over. Blaming only himself in the ordeal. By the time the chipmunk could react, the other boy was gone. The fox locked himself in the bathroom. The school was almost over. He wanted nothing to do with anyone.
He was upset, mostly at himself. Why had he poured his heart out to the other boy? He felt guilty. He felt bad. In his mind…his friendship. The only friendship he had in the entire world was over. His world was shattered. His sense of self was broken. Xavier walked back to class. His mind was just as distraught and confused. A boy had never confessed to him before, let alone his best friend. It was something he wasn't ready for. He wanted to go home.
The rest of the day went by at a snail's pace for both boys. Xavier was approached by more than enough students about his quitting the lacrosse team. He had no patience for any of them. Not even bothering to answer their so-called questions. His mind was torn into pieces. He wanted clarity and was at a loss for what to do. The boy sat alone under the tree, trying to gather his thoughts to himself while he waited to be picked up.
Pent was the last person to leave school. He felt empty and alone. The vacancy of the school represented his existence to him. He sluggishly moved along until he was outside. The cub took a deep breath, telling himself that he needed to be strong for Samaliel. After all…Samaliel didn't know about his feelings and Pent didn't' want him to be bothered by what he perceived to be a mature issue.
By the time Samaliel arrived, Pent had re-collected himself. Reading a book while waiting for his brother. His reddened eyes not coming across as a flag to the younger cub. The smaller boy instead assumed he had read too many books again. The younger boy proceeded to share his day with his brother. When asked about his own, Pent came up with a white lie that everything was fine and that he and Xavier were hanging out again.
The two retired to the bus where Pent looked out the window. A sense of longing remained within him. The image of himself peered back at him. The reflection of a sad pup who wanted nothing more than friendship. Again feeling defeated that he ended the relationship himself. He sighed as he dove his face into another book. Eager to wash away his worries and forget about everything that happened.
Xavier's mother pulled up to the side of the school, noticing that he was alone. She thought it strange that he was alone as he was almost always around other people. She watched him slump toward the vehicle as if something was bothering him. Her motherly instincts told her something was wrong. She waited until he was in the car to find out. After all…he couldn't protest if he was a captive audience.
The boy filed into the front seat of the car and buckled himself in. His gaze remained ever downward. Not even bothering to put his bag on the floor. She started the car since she didn't want to delay traffic.
"How was School?" She started casually as not to alarm him.
Xavier murmured. "Fine."
"Oh yeah? Did you do anything fun, new, or exciting?" The woman headed out of the parking lot towards their home.
He spoke in a frustrated tone. "No."
"Did something happen today at school? I get the feeling you aren't telling me something." She bluntly said as it didn't seem the other way would work.
The boy looked at her. "N-no."
"I think your lying. I'm your mother. I don't like being lied to and I can tell when your fibbing." The mother warned him.
He peered out the window to avoid her gaze. "Nothing happened."
"Second warning, Xae. Either you tell me what happened or I'm going to ground you for lying to me." She knew full well how to manipulate him when she needed to.
Xavier blurted out. "But mom…I didn't do anything."
"But nothing. Out with it. What happened at school today? What's bothering you? This is your last chance." His mother was a stern woman when she needed to be.
The cub sighed today. "Someone told me today they have feelings for me."
"Oh? Well…why is that such a big deal. You should be happy that someone likes you that way. Not everyone is lucky to be a handsome and talented boy like yourself." She tried brown-nosing him to get more information from him.
He whined. "Mom…"
"So who is it? Was it that girl Sasha you've been after for a while?" The mother knew of her son's latest love interest.
The boy moaned. "No Mom."
"Then who is it?" She couldn't help but be curious.
The chipmunk boy hesitated before answering. "Pent."
"Oh? Is that the shy Arctic fox boy you've been hanging out with?" She vaguely recalled him from the other day.
He nodded softly. "Yeah."
"Well, you should be flattered. That boy was very brave to tell you that today." The older rodent couldn't believe it but wasn't about to question it.
He looked back at her. "What should I do, Mom?"
"What did you say to him when he told you?" She made a turn towards the street where they lived.
Xavier lowered his voice. "N-nothing…I didn't know how to respond."
"I'm sure it was confusing for you to have a boy tell you their feelings but you at least owe it to him to acknowledge them. If you think you're confused, think of how he must feel right now." The mother continued to try and guide him the best she could.
The younger boy fingered his pocket, touching his phone. "I guess."
"Honey, that boy helped you study for your midterms did he not? He's supposedly your best friend isn't he?" She pulled into their house parking lot but didn't unlock the doors.
He nodded. "Yeah."
"Then prove it to him. Show him your support. Even if you don't feel the same way. You at least need to acknowledge his feelings. If he asks how you feel be truthful but gentle. He is likely just as confused as you are." The mother unlocked the car so he could get out.
The boy forced a smile at her. "Thanks, Mom."
"Good luck, honey. I trust you will make the right decision." They both got out of the car.
Xavier and his mother went to their home. The cub retired to his room. He wanted to be alone. Taking the little necklace he was wearing off his neck and looked at it. Dangling the charm in his fingers. Reading his name on it. He couldn't help but wonder how long Pent had felt this way about him. Xavier pulled out his phone and began deleting names of it, going through each of the kids on the school lacrosse team.
His list continued to get shorter and shorter until he got to Pent. He fingered the screen, hovering over the delete button but didn't press it. He just couldn't do it. The chipmunk cared too much about the boy to just let him go because he had feelings for him. Instead, he clicked the text button and began to type.
"Pent…I am sorry about how I acted today. I wasn't expecting you to tell me what you did. I was caught off guard
and I didn't know how to react. I've never had….a boy tell me that before. But…you're my best friend. I can't just leave you hanging. I don't hate you. I'm touched you feel that way about me. So…I hope you forgive me. I'm sorry I didn't answer you today."
Xavier hesitated before clicking send. With that, the deed was done. He felt a little bit better about himself now. Though he still felt conflicted with himself he felt happy about sending the text. He put the phone in his pocket, expecting to hear back from Pent at any moment.
The white fox was at his home. Chilling in his room with his brother. He had buried his snout in another book. Denying himself the right to cry. Bottling up his emotions, as boys his age sometimes did. He had put his phone to the side and wasn't paying attention to it. The fox overheard a buzz. It wasn't often that he got texts so he assumed it had to be spam or some notification for an app he didn't check recently.
It was before dinner before he got up from sitting down. The fox looked at his phone. The lock screen showed Xavier's name. His heart sank. Part of him believed it was over. But he wanted to know…he needed certainty. He proceeded to read the text. It took him a moment to process it, a slight smile returning to his face. Happy at least that he hadn't lost his best friend because of his feelings.
"Xae…it took me a long time to come up with what to tell you. I didn't even know that I should. I like you a lot. I think about you all the time…about us. I love hanging out with you. I don't care if you feel the same way or not. I know you like girls…and that's okay."
Pent pushed send and proceeded to the kitchen to hit up dinner with his brother. Not worried about his phone. The fear of losing his friend had left his mind. He didn't feel nearly as bad. His confession had made him a bit less nervous. Though he still wasn't sure what to make of it. Able to make food for him and his brother without alarming Samaliel of what had happened today.
When his meal was over and Pent had retired to his bed, he grabbed his phone from the desk. He wanted to make sure that Samaliel didn't read the texts. After all, he didn't need Samaliel to know about his feelings. It would remain a secret for now…at least between himself and Xavier or so he hoped. He turned on the screen and saw the other cub had responded to him.
"Pent, I don't want to hurt your feelings. I'm sure that was very difficult today. I don't want to mislead you but I don't think I want a relationship with a boy. We can still be friends. We can still hang out. But I need you to understand that I'm not sure I'm interested in anything more than that."
Pent had already accepted that even before he told Xavier about his feelings. He hadn't convinced himself of any possibility of otherwise.
"I'm okay with that, Xavier. I just want to be friends….I just tried to be honest with you. just hope it won't be weird between us now that you know." The fox tried to keep it short and sweet.
A moment of delay followed before Xavier responded.
"Nah, nothing will change. I respect your feelings. You're entitled to that. Just respect my decision and everything will be cool." The chipmunk didn't want to lose a friend any more than the other boy did.
"I can do that…thanks, Xavier. It means a lot to me. Have a good night." Pent sent the text with only a half smile on his face.
"Good night, Pent." Xavier turned off his phone.
Both boys retired for the rest of the night. Pent felt a little bit better now and was able to sleep through the night without another dream. Xavier on the other hand was a ball of mixed emotions. Thoughts of what it would be like to date a boy. He liked hanging out with Pent…but did he want more than that? Questioning himself wether he'd like it or not. Convincing himself that he would do it for Pent. Now finding himself to be considering the very same thing he was uncertain of.
