Raphael was sitting at his work table, delicately painting the eyebrows on the face of a Barbie doll he was refurbishing. It had originally been a doll from the eighties with heavy makeup and matted hair. Some acetone on the face removed the original paint and a few hours soaking in fabric softener helped smooth out the hair. He was glad that he was able to salvage the hair. Replacing it would have taken a great deal longer that it did for him to brush it out.
The light brown brow was the last detail he had to do on the face. Once it was dried, he would be able to style the hair and then place the head on a body. He already had a few Barbie sized dresses made, using materials from formal gowns that were too damaged to be salvageable for anything other than scrap.
He used real gold and small jewels as accents and jewelry. When finished, the doll he was working on would put any found on the market to shame and would sell in April’s shop for several hundred dollars. There was a waiting list, his dolls were so popular. Most people didn’t care what size doll they got, so long as they got the next one.
He had his favorite movie, Beauty and the Beast, playing on a small television, DVD player combo. He wasn’t really watching it, having it on more for background noise. He softly sang along to the music as he worked, his deep baritone often falling out of key but he knew every word.
He had just finished the eyebrows and was debating on whether or not to add a beauty mark when someone knocked on the door. He had been expecting April with a new supply of old dolls but a glance at the clock told him that it was too early for it to be her.
Placing the brush in a jar of water to clean, Raph turned off his desk lights and got up to see who was knocking at his door. When he opened the door, his heart jumped into his throat. Donna stood there, looking up at him with her doll clutched in her hands.
He stumbled over his words for a moment before settling on, “Hey.”
“Hi,” Donna said, looking down at her doll. “I was wondering if you could help me.”
“Sure.” Raph nodded. This was a start. She was at least talking to him. “What do you need?”
“I need help… um… brushing her hair…?” She looked up at him and then sighed. “Okay so, honestly, I’m just using her as an excuse,” she rambled. “I came here to talk…. I figured that since Leah and Tello have officially declared themselves as a couple, it would be best to let them share a room and so I… need to….”
“… find a new place to sleep,” Raph finished for her.
Donna nodded.
“I… uh,” Raph sighed. He was at a loss. He had no idea where she was going with this. Did she want to share a room with him? Did she want him to help her clean out another empty space? “I… will… do whatever you want.”
“Well,” Donna hesitated, looking hard at the ground. “You and I are…,” she shrugged, “the last ones. So… maybe I can stay in your room?”
“Oh,” Raph managed to say before his voice gave out on him. So, she decided that being alone was the less desirable option. He cleared his throat in hopes it would be enough to regain his voice. “We have some extra tatami stored away somewhere. We can pick out the best one and set you up a place to sleep.”
“We should also start spending more time together,” Donna suggested. “Get to know each other.” Unable to find his voice, Raph nodded in response. There was a long awkward silence between them before she cleared her throat. “Can I come in?”
“Yeah,” Raph said, stepping out of the way while mentally kicking himself for not offering it first. She was opening herself up to him. He needed to seize that opportunity and show her that she was wrong about him.
Donna looked around the room. “You’ve got a lot of stuff in here.”
“I’ve been collecting for a long time,” Raph replied, closing the door and then pointed to the doll in Donna’s hands. “If you want me to clean her up a little for you, I can. I’ve got the time. I can probably soften the hair up so you can get a brush through it.”
“Um… sure,” she said, handing over the doll. “Why not.”
Keeping his distance, Raph reached out to take it from her. “It will take a few minutes. Feel free to look around. Just be careful around the work table over there. The paint’s still wet.”
“Okay.” She scanned the room again as another silence fell over them. After a while, her attention was caught by the movie. “What movie is this?”
“Beauty and the Beast,” Raph answered as he filled a small plastic tub with warm water. “It’s one of my favorites. I like to listen to it while I work.”
“I’ve never seen it.” Sitting down to get a better view, she settled in to watch the remainder of the movie. “What’s going on?”
“Here.” Raph picked up the remote control and restarted the movie. “You can watch it from the beginning.”
“You didn’t have to do that,” Donna said.
Raph shrugged. “It’s okay. I’ve seen it hundreds of times. Like I said, I just had it on for background noise. You can watch it while I clean up your doll and time will fly by.”
“Okay,” Donna surrendered and then turned her attention back to the small television.
The silence that fell was a great deal less awkward. Donna was occupied with the movie while Raph worked on the doll.
He didn’t want to over step and do too much but he did want to make a noticeable difference. While the hair soaked, he scrubbed the body with a slurry of baking soda and water. The hard plastic body was still in decent condition and the grime came right off. He washed and mended the tattered dress and then touched up the paint on the face. Most of the eye lashes had fallen off so he glued some new ones on the stationary lids. Finally, he brushed through the hair, taking care not to mess up the new paint.
Raph had finished with the doll long before the movie finished but Donna had been so engrossed in it, Raph didn’t want to disturb her so he started to work on styling the Barbie doll’s hair.
When the credits started rolling, Donna turned off the television. “That was a good movie, it had me in tears a few times. I really liked the ballroom scene. It was lovely.” She turned to face Raph and he presented her with her cleaned doll. Her eyes went wide. “Oh wow!” Taking the doll from Raph, she turned it over in her hands. “This is the same doll?”
“Yeah,” Raph said with a nod, scratching the back of his head. “Sorry that she’s still a little damp but the paint is at least dry. I hope I didn’t do too much.”
Keeping her eyes on the doll, Donna shook her head. “She looks wonderful. Thank you. I didn’t think she could ever look this good. You’re amazing.”
Raph’s cheeks flushed. “I’ve had a lot of practice mending things.”
“Like this over here?” Walking over to a full-size dress Raph was in the process of mending, Donna inspected his work. “What got you started in all of this?”
“When we were small, Master Splinter would read us stories,” Raph explained, deciding to be completely honest. “He found this book with a bunch of old princess stories in it. They were all about evil witches putting magic curses on royalty then someone else would come along, break the curse with love and they would live happily ever after.
“I got it in my head that we were cursed. I mean, it all fit, in my young mind at least. We were different and had to remain hidden, just like in the stories.” He let out a soft chuckle as he thought back on those times. “I thought that there was no way a young and beautiful princess would fall in love with my father, he was too old, and had no faith in my brothers so I made it my responsibility to break the curse.
“I knew it was gonna take a lot of work to get a woman to look past the way I looked and fall in love with me so I started collecting things to give her, to win her over. I became obsessed with princesses. I wanted to get in their heads, find out what they liked. My brothers thought I was weird and they gave me a hard time over it.”
Raph shook his head and this time his chuckle was filled with sorrow. “I yelled at them, saying that at least I was trying to break this curse. That was when Master Splinter sat me down to tell me that there was no curse and that we were never human. It broke my heart.
“At first, I refused to believe him. In time, I realized that he was right but a small part of me never gave up hope that I would find someone to give all this to. That she would look past this,” he indicated the way he looked with a wave of his hand, “and… love me.”
“Wow,” Donna said softly, looking at Raph as if seeing him for the first time.
“Yeah.” Raph looked away, his heart sinking as his stomach tied itself in knots. “It was stupid.”
“I don’t think so,” Donna said. “There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be loved by someone.” She once again looked around the room. “All of this stuff would have been great for a human.” Looking at the dress, she ran her fingers along the curve of the bodice. “Not something that a mutant turtle could use. I wouldn’t even fit in this.”
“Well, that’s the wrong cut for you,” Raph said as a matter of fact. “That’s going to April’s shop. You would look amazing in a dress with the right cut.”
Donna laughed and shook her head. “I would look ridiculous in a dress.”
Feeling a little bit more confident, Raph allowed himself a half smile. “Mind if I prove you wrong?”
Dumbstruck, Donna watched as Raph moved over to the rack where he had his collection of dresses hanging. “You can’t be serious,” she said as Raph pulled a garment bag down. “A dress made for a human will not fit me. I’ve got extra on my back and lacking something up front.”
Raph unzipped the bag, carefully pulling out a formal periwinkle dress with silver accents, and presented it to her. “When you and your sisters first arrived, I started modifying some of the dresses. This one should fit you.”
“Really?” Donna looked at the dress. “You want me to try it on?”
Taking a step back, Raph shrugged and cleared his throat. “You don’t have to. But if you were to put it on, it would,” look amazing, he thought, but said, “fit,” instead.
“I’ll put it on just to prove to you that I would look silly in it,” Donna stated, taking the dress from Raph.
After placing her doll down, she bent over and started to step into the dress. Raph cleared his throat, causing her to pause. “It won’t look right if you’ve got all your gear on.”
Straightening up, Donna looked Raph in the eye. “Is this all a ploy to get me naked?”
Raph laughed, feeling as if a barrier had been broken. Was she actually flirting with him? “Technically, we’re already naked. The gear is more for practicality than modesty.”
“True,” Donna smiled and placed the dress over the back of a nearby chair so that she could remove her gear.
“I’m gonna get a few other things,” Raph said, darting off in excitement to search through his collection of accessories as she got dressed. With items in hand, Raph turned to make his way back to Donna. What he saw stopped him in his tracks.
The sleeveless dress fit her as he had hoped it would and the color looked stunning against her olive-green skin. The thick straps crossed behind her neck, just above the shell and then dropped back down the sides to hold the dress in place, keeping the shell exposed. The neckline was low enough to show just the top of her plastron and the bodice was straight down her front. The long, ankle length skirt folded nicely over her hips and came up high enough in the back to fit under the lip of her carapace. He stood there gawking at her for so long that she started to blush.
“I told you that I would look silly.”
Raph shook his head. “You look… amazing.”
“Really?” She sounded as if she didn’t believe him as she looked around the room. “Let me see for myself. Do you have a mirror?”
“Not yet,” Raph said, regaining his composure. “If you don’t mind me getting a little handsy, I can add a few accents first to pull the whole outfit together.”
Donna’s already flushed skin darkened further and she gave a slight nod of approval. Standing still while Raph moved around her, she allowed him to work. He placed silver jewelry around her wrist, neck, ankle and bicep. Next he placed a small headdress on her that had parts that dangled down like earrings. For the final touches, Raph dusted her cheeks with a silver shimmer, accented her eyes with purple and silver liner, and highlighted her bottom lip with a shimmery gloss.
Satisfied with the final result, he led her to a full mirror and stood her in front of it. “You’re beautiful.”
“This doesn’t look horrible,” she said in disbelief. While she stood, transfixed by her image, Raph rushed over to put his suit on. Donna didn’t even notice he was missing, she was so taken aback by how she looked.
“I’d like to think that’s how Turtle fashion would look, if that were a thing,” he replied as he tied his bowtie. “There’s no reason to hide the carapace. It’s actually quite appealing.”
“You actually find my shell appealing?” Donna asked, turning to look at him. She smiled at the sight of him in his suit. “You look nice.”
“Thank you,” he said, grinning back. “I didn’t want you to feel odd being the only one dressed up so I thought I would join you. And, yes, isn’t it the carapace that male turtles are usually attracted to? It would explain why there are so many YouTube videos of them humping anything dome shaped.”
“I suppose,” Donna said, chuckling softly.
“You wanna know something else I did while I was gathering things to impress a princess?” Raph walked over to the radio and turned it on. A song of unconditional love started to play with a melody that would suit his needs. Turning back to Donna, Raph held out his hand. “I taught myself how to dance.”
With a giggle, Donna reached out and took his hand. “Are you any good?”
“Let’s find out.” Pulling her body flush against his, he led her through the dance. There were a few missteps in the beginning due to nerves but they eventually managed to learn how to read one another. Before long he was able to incorporate more complex moves, dipping and spinning her in time to the music.
Due to the size of Raph’s collection, there wasn’t a lot of room to move, but they made the most of the space they had. It was invigorating. For the first time in a long time he was able to forget his pain and find joy.
The song ended and they both stopped, panting from both the exertion from dancing and the rush of endorphins. Caught up in the moment, he lowered his face closer to hers but caught himself the last second and pulled back. She was only here because she was settling for him, not because she was choosing him. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to….”
“It’s okay,” she said softly. They were still standing close and she rested her hands on his chest. “I wouldn’t have objected.” She looked up at him and he could feel her heart pounding. “I know you’re holding back… because…. Can we forget that I ever had that crush on Leo? Please? Neither of you are…,” she looked down, “how I assumed you would be.”
“We used to be,” Raph said. “I was everything you assumed I would be and, to be honest, who I used to be wouldn’t have wanted you either. Like you and Rachael, Donny and I didn’t like each other much when we were younger. We were too different. Going top side and fighting for our lives changed that.”
Donna had a distant look in her eyes as she thought. “I think I understand. When we were out on patrol the other night, Rachael… well… I didn’t expect her to be so protective. I thought she would laugh at me as I got beat up but the moment I started to falter, she rushed over to help me and then made sure I was okay.”
“Yeah,” Raph smiled. “I’m sure it surprised her as well. Seeing you in danger triggered something in her. If she is anything like me, the overwhelming need to keep her family safe is starting to grow inside her. I’m sure she’s even had a few nightmares of not getting to you in time but she’s not to the point yet where she’ll let you know that.”
Biting her bottom lip, Donna looked up at Raph. “You really didn’t have to stop.”
It took a moment for him to register what she meant but when it hit him, his heart skipped a beat. Looking down at her, he licked his lips before hesitantly leaning forward. Their lips met and then separated in a soft, closed mouth kiss. He closed his eyes as he moved in for a second and this time they stayed together longer.
Donna parted her lips and Raph deepened the kiss, his tongue plunging in and sliding against hers. Desire stirred within him but the pain pills in his system kept it from igniting. In that moment, he was elated while his heart broke and he mentally berated himself for becoming addicted to pain pills in the first place.
When they parted, Donna sighed with a smile. “That was nice.”
“Yeah,” Raph agreed and then sucked his bottom lip. He wanted more. He could tell that she wanted more. She was starting to want him and he knew that he was unable to step up to the task. As joyous as this moment was supposed to be, it left him feeling sick with regret.
Reluctantly, he pulled away from her. “I need to finish that last doll before April gets here. Why don’t you go tell Leah and Tello that you are willing to move into my room so they can be together. See if they are up for it.”
“Okay,” Donna replied with a slight nod. “I’m gonna go take this off first,” she chuckled awkwardly as she made her way off to the side to change.
Raph watched her as she removed the dress. That same desire stirred but he was too numb for it to become anything more. His body just wouldn’t respond.
She washed the makeup from her face and then put on her gear. After collecting her doll, she headed to the door. “I’ll see you later.”
“I won’t be much longer,” he told her as he opened the door. “When I’m done here we can set everything else up in my… our room.”
“Okay,” she said softly before quickly kissing Raph and making her leave.
Closing the door after her, Raph leaned against it. He wasn’t entirely sure what had just happened, his mind was still reeling from the kiss, but he knew one thing for certain. He needed to find a way to finally end his addiction.
