Okay. Wow. What a Thanksgiving week. Eventful. I'll spare the details, but let me give you some highlights.
Wednesday, I found myself actually saying aloud "I want to die" when I thought I was alone at work. Coworker demands my phone number and that I text him if I ever say or think that again. Not gonna. Already didn't.
Thursday, over with family for Thanksgiving. Mom tried to get me drunk so I would out myself to my family. Ended up confessing that mom wants to disown me instead, something I meant to keep hidden. Did not tell them why, and mom won't say so herself, but admitted she wanted me out and away from her daughter, my sister, who was upset by the idea.
Also, drunkenly, when alone with my sister, apparently I gasped suddenly, and said "I just realized!" I leaned in and whispered "Lesbian" to her, and she freaked out about how it took me this long to realize she wasn't straight. I half remember this. I have zero chill with alcohol apparently. To be fair I did have my suspicions but never brought it up for her own safety. No doubt my mom will do the same to her she's doing to me.
Saturday, some jack arse slashed one (1) of my tires. I took the last spot at the store lot before someone else, and they were angry. Came out to find a useless tire. Worst thing is, if they got all 4, my insurance would have covered it. But they got one. And those things are friggin expensive.
Also, throughout the week, I've had a couple friends recommend I go to therapy and get myself some medicinal help before I revert back to self harm. I don't think I'm that bad, but I suppose it wouldn't hurt. So I'll also be seeking therapy or something.
What even is my life right now?
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7 years, 5 months ago
28 Nov 2016 17:20 CET
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