I'm sure you've all noticed that I've been much more quiet and reclusive and only puked out a couple things (semi) recently.... Sorry :-(
I've had a pretty big upheaval in my life the last few months and it's just had my mind (and body) EVERYWHERE but actually drawing; I've wanted to, I kept saying on a near daily basis that "I should draw today" or worse "I'mma sit down and draw" to no avail.
Now, the cause of this upheaval, when I say upheaval, I don't actually mean in a bad way. I've picked up a housemate for the first time in a LONG time and, well, it's been a glaring spotlight on how bad my depression had gotten as well as how much it had crippled my ability to care for myself or my living situation for years now. The pile of dishes that was unwashed for 17 months ALONE was actually a shock to me, even though it was my own mess. Tl;Dr? How I was living wasn't pretty and probably was a huge source of my depression; but everything just seemed to big to start tackling.
The new addition to the house has been patient, helpful and has had such a positive impact on my mood that it's at a level I don't have a way to express and it seems to have at least spurred me into action to actually DO more around the house... Even if they're dragging me by the tail as I'm hissing the whole way, once I actually start, I do it.
It's starting to crack the wall of my depression and executive dysfunction as well. I've been grateful and am doing... better.
The... "downside?" Is that my ADHD and executive dysfunction have been kicked into overdrive by the activity and my extremely low energy (another medical issue alltogether) and just haven't been able to focus enough on anything for any length of time. As I said in the title; ADHD got brrrr.
Yet, I actually dug in and set up a small, private draw pile with some friends last night and felt GOOD about it (and hanging out in voice with the best kind of crazy people I know). I've even been doodling at work on my Android tablet today, so maybe, just maybe, I might be able to refocus on art more often again soon!
Thanks for your patience peeps and please, take better care of your physical self and your mental well being than I have been. You -ARE- worth it.
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7 months, 2 weeks ago
14 Jun 2024 20:03 CEST
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