...He falls.
It seems to be taking quite some time. He tumbles through the black, head over heels, arms over knees and beak over flippers.
He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but there was something odd about that last part.
The sensation of falling suddenly stopped, but Jasper hung in the air. The sudden stop he had anticipated had not killed him, after all. This, in his book, was a plus. Perhaps the first plus he'd experienced in quite some time – but a plus was a plus, and, he decided presently, he'd take it.
The falling, however, hadn't been accompanied by the sensation of ground beneath his feet – and... yes, they were feet now, he decided. Not flippers. Or fins. And he was speaking with a perfectly ordinary human mouth. At least, as far as he could tell from batting at it with his flippers.
“Oh no they've gone again,” he muttered.
“What's gone?” came a voice from the darkness.
“My hands. They've gone all... flippery,” Jasper replied.
A cat sauntered out of the darkness, and with a sudden sense of vertigo Jasper's feet finally found themselves. He was standing in a heavily wooded area, a campfire between him and the cat.
“Shame really,” the cat said. “Hands are useful. No opposable thumbs with flippers.” The cat was smiling in that annoying way all cats seemed to be when they were enjoying someone else's discomfort.
“Yeah, I'm not used to- oh hang on,” he said as he glanced down and saw his human hands had returned once more. “Look, just what is all this about. I've had one hell of a day.”
The cat smirked, or rather, failed to remove the permanent smirk which seemed to have attached itself to it's facial features. “Oh it's about to get so much worse.”
“Look – I get it. The tumble though blackness, the sudden stop. This must be hell, right?” Jasper asked.
“Far from it, in fact, though bonus points for not being absolutely terrified,”
“Well the ride was almost long enough for me to get bored,” Jasper boasted, “But where the hell are we, and for that matter – although I know it's a cliché – who are you?”
“Hah, the good old 'where am I?' and the 'who are you?' - all you need is a 'how did I get here?' and you have my average Friday night,” the cat joked, sitting lazily by the fire.
“Oh I'm pretty sure I know how I got here,” Jasper said, rounding the fire and sitting near the cat. “I was...” he started, and then stopped. “I'm sure it was... and I was...”
The cat nodded slowly. “It really is a devil sometimes isn't it. Feels like it's on the tip of your tongue, don't it?”
Jasper stared. “No I... Yes. It absolutely does. That's the perfect way to describe it. I know it's there, I just don't know where exactly.”
The cat nodded. “Well, that's where I come in donkey-man,”
“Hey, who are you calling an ass- oh... I see,” Jasper said, noting how his feet had turned to hooves, and his nose was looking a lot more hairy than normal. “Huh, always said I wanted more facial hair.”
“Oh it suits you – it really, really does,” the cat said.
“You've got balls, I can tell you that. I could probably kick your teeth out,”
“Actually no, balls are something I have a distinct lack of.”
“What? Someone neutered a fine feline like you? That's criminal,” Jasper replied, keeping all but the tiniest traces of mocking from his voice.
“Wrong again, I'm afraid,” the cat said. “Perhaps it'll help if I tell you who I am.”
“Do tell,” Jasper replied.
“I'm...” the cat began, but after a few moments shrugged it's shoulders. “Nevermind – you don't know.”
“I know I don't know – that's why I'm asking,” Jasper said, exasperated.
“Good – questioning. That's positive. Keep that up and you'll be right as rain in no time.”
“Great. That isn't horribly enigmatic at all. What can I call you then, mystery cat.”
The cat smiled. “Call me Juni,”
“Juni? Oh! Right! You're a girl!” Jasper said. “That makes far more sense.”
“Well, that's certainly...” Juni began, but then shook her head. “Oh nevermind – listen, I've got to explain something.”
“I'm all ears. Not literally, of course. Well. I might be. I probably wouldn't notice, the way things are going.”
“If you're smart, you'll be as attentive as an eagle, as swift as a hummingbird and as cunning as a fox, Jasper.”
“Would someone with my level of swift, smart cunning be able to notice I never actually told you my name?”
Juni smiled. “Precisely.” She stood suddenly, and Jasper followed.
“There are three paths from this fire. One leads to the gate, one leads to the beach and one leads to the farm. Choose wisely, my dear, dear friend.”
The paths stood out from the forest. Whilst the trees and bracken formed an impenetrable barrier – the thick woods too dark and thorny to travel – as the cat spoke there appeared lamps on all three of the paths.
“That's a neat trick. Even in a place like this,” Jasper said, turning back to Juni...
...Who wasn't there anymore.
Jasper walked around the fire. “Nice disappearing act too. Maybe if I learn it I'll be able to get out of this place. Three paths, huh?” The lamps were each etched with their destination. If Jasper had to guess, he would definitely have bet that those marks were made with cat claws.
“Well then, Jasper. You've really messed up this time. I guess I could sit by this nice warm fire, or I could get going.”
