Pain. It's something you learn to adapt to. Though it may seem hard at first, you begin to find a way to handle anything that's thrown at you. I am a prime example of this. Ever since my creation, I've been feared or hated by mostly everyone, which gave me great practice in the art of being alone.
With all these years of subduing any suffering I had endured, I thought nothing could hurt me again. So why did it feel like I was breaking now? After all this time, it was the first that I've ever felt like my entire being was about to shatter.
He panted in the corner, holding his bleeding arm tightly. I just stood up, staring at him like he was nothing. If I wanted to, I could easily pierce the so called heart that Shadow was suppose to have. Yet I didn't. Why?
He didn't fight back, nor did he scream out for help. All he did was take each hit I gave him, not even flinching when he was clearly in a lot of pain.
A part of me wanted to stab him over and over again, never stopping till this rage in me subsided. But seeing him looking so weak stopped me.
“I could kill you right now.”
“I know,” he said softly.
“Maybe I should.”
Hearing his nonchalant attitude didn't help keep me calm. The bastard could've shown some remorse, something that could've given me any sign that he was sorry.
“Are you done?”
I lifted a spike at him. “Should I be?”
“No, just thought I'd get lucky and you would give me a rest.”
One of my tendrils found it's way to Shadow's leg, and dug deep into his fur. He twitched as it moved around his bone. “Maybe I should break your leg, then your knight in shining armor might come and save you?”
He grinned. “Sonic would never do something like that. Not his style.” Hearing him say that name was enough to almost make me rip his leg apart. His hands formed into a fist, clearly showing his refusal to not cry out. He then looked back at me, eyes wide. “If you're going to kill me then just do it. I mean, it's in your nature to cause destruction right?”
“Something you knew when going with me.” He looked away. “So tell me, if you didn't care, why waste my time?”
“Don't know...Guess I was getting kind of irritated with Sonic giving me the run around with Silver....”
My eyes narrowed. “Using me to quell your own jealousy?”
“I don't blame you if you hate me. It's my fault after all. Should've just told you how I felt.” Shadow paused for a moment, but he still didn't face me. “So, do what you want to me. I won't hold it against you.”
Never did I ever expect to hear Shadow say those words. Did he really love Sonic that much that he'd be willing to die?
That thought made me feel sick to my stomach. Right then and there I should've broken him apart, but I couldn't find it in myself to hurt him anymore.
My tendril parted from his leg, and Shadow sighed relieved that I let him go.
“Very well...You have your wish. I won't bother either of you after this.” I walked past him, our eyes not meeting at all. But before I left, I stopped at the door. “Just remember that the decision you made will have dire consequences on those other then just us.”
It felt like I had been out here for an eternity though it was only a couple of hours. Sometimes, I kept thinking to myself that it was some bad dream, and I would wake up from it and feel Sonic's warmth again. Sadly, from the coldness of the rain, I realized that was just an impossible wish.
Just where was I going anyway? I couldn't go back home because in this timeline, I didn't have one. Maybe I could just have gone back to my own world, a world of nothing but death and decay. No. That really was just a foolish thought.
So, I just kept walking, hoping that the rain would let up. It didn't though, in fact it felt like it was getting harder.
Suddenly, a hard gust of wind hit my face. It blinded me for a moment, but luckily I found a pole to hang on to as I got my quills out of my face.
My eyes cleared and I found myself at the park. It looked very different at night, like something out of a horror movie. With the rain picking up though, and the sudden wind, it was the only place I could find free shelter.
Through the darkness I looked, but couldn't find what I was looking for. Slowly I walked, trying my best not to slip. If only there hadn't been so much rain and wind, then I could fly.
A sudden crack caused me to jump, and my body wavered to the side. My arms desperately. tried to grab ahold onto something, but all they felt was air.
Down I fell, rolling on the hill. Mud kept hitting my face, and splattered into my eyes. I was relieved when I finally stopped. My body felt numb though, and when I tried to move it, a sharp pain from my leg went through my entire body.
I tried to use my knees to stand up, but quickly fell back into the mud when my right knee quivered.
Thanks to my stupid idea, my leg throbbed. I looked down to it, and noticed a huge, deep cut that made it's way from my foot to my thigh.
This was the first time that I'd ever seen such a deep wound, and it was worse since it was on my leg. I touch at it, and twinged in deep pain. It seemed to be much deeper then I thought.
“Sonic....” My eyes widened. Why did I have to call out his name? I knew better then anyone that he wasn't going to come for me...not this time.
In the darkness I spotted something familiar, it was the tree that I had been looking for. In it, was the hole that Sonic once showed me when we came here together. I gave a soft smile. Shelter at last.
My fingers dug into the dirt and pulled me over to the tree slowly. My leg ached every time I moved, but I ignored it the best I could. Laying in dirty mud was much worse.
It took some time for me to make it to the hole, but I did. Once in the mostly dry area, I lifted myself to the wall, and put my arms to my sides. My leg was seriously beginning to burn, and I noticed that some of the mud had gotten inside the cut “D-damn.”
My eyes began heavy. I was scared, very scared. I couldn't recall if I'd ever been in a situation like this all alone.
I buried my head in my good leg. I only someone was with me, then this wouldn't be frightening at all.
An then, he came into my mind. Even with all that happened, I couldn't stop thinking about him. “......Sonic......”
“Unbelievable. How can you still call out his name?”
I shot my head up. “Whose there?!” No one showed up at my question, but I could feel I wasn't alone.
“Look at you. You're so pathetic. It's kind off sad.”
Out of nowhere a shadow popped out in front of me. “Ahhh!” I fell back, nearly hitting my head on a nearby rock.
“Sorry. You did want to see me though.”
“W-what are you?”
“Can't you tell?”
I shook my head. “All I can see is your dark figure.”
“Hehe. Oops. Let me fix that.”
Slowly the black figure began to transform into a white color. It only took me a moment to realize that I was staring at myself.
“There. Happy now?”
“What's going on? Y-you look just like me.”
“I do? And here I thought I was some monkey.”
“You don't have to be sarcastic.”
He grinned. “Sorry. It's just fun toying with you.”
“Who are you?”
“Come now. I thought stupid questions were over?” I suppose it was dumb to ask that since he looked like me.
“Okay...Then what do you want?”
“To help you of course.”
“Yes. You're my creator after all. I should reward you for all you've done. Mmm, but would that mean I'd be rewarding myself?”
“L-look, I don't get what you're saying, so could you please just leave me alone?”
He grimaced. “How rude. I use all this power to come and help you, and all you can do is send me off again.”
“I-I'm sorry, but I'm not in the mood to chat right now.”
He tilted his head and then looked to my leg. “No wonder why it was hard for me to walk.” He looked back to me. “You should be more careful next time.”
Before I could tell him to go away again, his hand hovered over my leg. I almost moved away, but he gave me a serious look. He looked scarier then Shadow.
Suddenly, the pain in my leg ceased a bit and my knee was more movable again. “What did you do?”
“Fixed you up a bit, thought it was only a little.”
He winked. “That's a secret. Now, onto that reward.”
“...I don't want a reward...I mean thanks for healing me, but I really want to be left alone now.”
“Oh Silver, we both know that's not true. I think we know what you really want.” I looked at him confused. He just grabbed my hand and put it to his cheek, it was warm. “You must really hurt after what happened. Being betrayed by a lover is never easy.”
I pulled away from him. “H-how do you know about that?”
“Like I've already said, I'm you. I know all about your life. For example, I know how Blaze rejected you and you came running to Sonic.”
I blushed. “I didn't do that.”
He grinned. “Yeah you did. But don't worry, I won't tell anyone.”
“You're really not making me feel any better, “ I said angrily.
“Heh, sorry. I guess I'm not the most sensitive person. After all, I know only the negative emotions you feel.”
He sighed. “You really don't know anything about me do you?”
“Well, it's not so bad. Once we get our revenge, everything will be fine.”
He got that irritated expression again. “Against Sonic and Shadow.”
“B-but I don't want revenge against them.”
His face suddenly went scary, like he was going to kill me. I never knew my eyes could hold such an livid glare.
“I don't like people who lie Silver, especially when they're me.”
“Grrr, stop apologizing so much. That good heart of your's is so annoying.” He came closer into me, our noises nearly touching. “If you had some attitude in you like Shadow, then Sonic wouldn't have left you. Heck, maybe even Blaze would've gone with you.” He then floated away from me and smiled. “But then again, it's not all your fault. It's not like you know what real pain is.”
Hearing this so called me say that really pissed me off. I knew what pain was. I felt it almost all the time, even when I was at my happiest. “I-I know what pain is, and I know the worst of it. A guy like you has no right to tell me fucking otherwise!” He looked to me surprised. I quickly recalled what I did, and turned away. “S-sorry. I-I didn't mean to shout like that.”
“No, don't apologize,” he said joyfully. “That was beautiful.”
He closed his eyes and held his face. “If only you were more like that, then things would be better.” He looked to me, and though he appeared happy again, I couldn't help but feel scared from that glint he had. “Be that way from now on Silver, and you can make them suffer.”
There he went with that suffering stuff again. “Knock it off! I already told you I don't want revenge on anyone!” I turned away from him. “Besides, I knew long before Sonic and I were together that he loved Shadow. I was just too selfish to accept it. All I can do now is wish them luck.”
“Wish them luck.....?”
Out of nowhere I felt a tight grip on my throat. I looked ahead of me, and saw him right in front of me, eyes burning red. “Do you know how long I've suffered because of how you think like that?” His eyes grew bigger. “You, always thinking of others and never yourself, despite all the loneliness and hate you feel.” His grip tightened. “But tell me, have you ever once thought where those negative feelings go? They just don't disappear. They still linger deep within your heart. Only difference from you and others is that you have someone to take it away.”
I gasped for air. “I-I don't …..get what....you're saying.”
“Then here, I'll give you a dose of everything I've felt since we were born.”
He held his head to mine, and a wave of emotions filled my mind. They were nothing but sorrow, hate, and jealous all rolled into one.
The more he put into me, the more I felt like my head was going to split open. “AHHHHHHH!”
“Do you see now Silver, how much you've held back?” He pressed against me harder, causing me screams to turn into wails
He finally parted from me, and I fell to the ground, my head now having a splitting headache. “Now you know what's it's been like for me. Took me years to learn to control them.”
I didn't answer him, but instead held my head. Even though he was away from me, I could still feel what he put into me. I covered my eyes, hoping to stop crying. But I couldn't stop. The tears kept flowing, more then they ever did. It wasn't from the pain though. It was from finding out the truth about how much agony I was in.
Thing were silent between us, but I knew he was still watching me.“There's no need to cry Silver......I know it hurts...But don't worry” Warm arms made their way to my body. “Soon, all this grief will go away, and we'll have everything our hearts desire. All you have to do is submit to me.”I don't know if I was doing intentionally or if was another one of his trick, but I nodded yes. “Heh, good. Very soon they'll know the sorrow we've gone through and will understand true pain.”