And now, back to Furries, HPD, and You! Brought you you by Prozac - don't worry, be happy!
Honestly, it's like watching a documentary sometimes. Just watching something brought to light beyond my control. Doomed to spiral into disaster.
Histrionic Personality Disorder. Characterized by an individual being excessively emotional, attention-seeking, and often times inappropriately seductive.
It's criminal, almost, how I can be approached on more than one occasion and have people tell me that they find it disappointing how I seem to do my best to 'weasel my way into the popufur crowd.' By 'clinging' to popular artist-friends like Daigo or
,' I seem to be, to some, the scum of the community. An art whore. A moocher. Someone who does not deserve what has been given to me.
But I watch. I watch all these accusers and so-called straight-edgers do just what they are so quick to cast others away for. I think a synonym for HPD should be "murry purry bullshit."
Around here, we cling to others. Many of us seem to need the approval of those around us to such a degree that it transcends what is considered to be socially healthy. We're quick to claim others as our own. "My waifu" is thrown around a lot, for example. But what do we really mean by that? Does "loving" someone still hold as much weight when the community is riddled with "familes" that are more like harems?
I've been around for years. I've watched artists go from being sub-par to being very popular and successful. I've watched utter nobodies get their first piece of art, and watched their characters be catapulted into being the next big thing. I've seen people crumble under the weight they've placed upon themselves under the guise of the fandom being just that important to them. I've seen galleries disappear like a forest in a brush fire. I've been around the block a couple times.
It's an up and down slope that I think for the last couple years I've stagnated on. People recognize me, but I am hardly elevated to 'popufur' stardom. This is likely in part due to my lack of artistic ability, as this picture so readily demonstrates. But, it is the way it is. I don't know what you all think of me and my 'standing,' but I don't see myself as much to make a fuss about.
I need to remember - we all need to remember: there are more important things than this. Happiness and cuddles and kisses and attention and all that crap are great, but when you lose sight of what's real, you lose sight of yourself. Popularity is fine, but when you turn off your monitor and stand up from your computer, all the popularity on the internet means so much less.
Be here because you enjoy it. Don't just be here to be enjoyed.