Tilting my head toward Charlie, I eye the thermos he's holding. Something about it tells me it's for me, or at least I hope so. Once I'm sure no one's nearby, I glide down to the picnic area, landing on one of the tables overlooking the beach. We're far enough back that hopefully no one will notice us.
I try to swallow, but it doesn't work. This is just two friends... even if one of them is a little different. I won't scare him.
Charlie smiles nervously, gives a small nod to Shiners, and takes a seat beside me. I tilt my head again, trying to point at the thermos with my blunt beak, though I'm not sure it works. As much as I love what my beak represents, I almost wish it were sharper for moments like this.
He chuckles. ``Brought you some food. I wasn't sure what's safe for you now, so I asked my mom for plain chicken soup. Shouldn't be anything else in it.''
I nod, fighting the urge to rush over and grab the thermos, probably enough to send Charlie running if I did. I settle for clicking my beak instead, staring up at him with what I hope are puppy-dog eyes. It's probably more unnerving than cute.
Charlie can tell how excited I am and holds the thermos back. ``Hey, you don't get any if you take a finger too,'' he says, clearly guessing what I'm trying to do. He studies my beak, probably wondering if this is even going to work. ``I've got a couple of different-sized bowls here. Let's see what fits,'' he says, setting them on the table.
I look sheepish, or maybe eagl-ish, as I try to contain my excitement and force myself to relax. But I'm hungry, which feels strange since I ate earlier. I click my beak a few times before saying, <Sorry, just hungry. I feel like I've barely eaten anything today.> That isn't quite true. I had a big burger earlier, but my stomach doesn't seem to care.
Charlie looks at me, concerned, as Shiners speaks up. ``You have a new body, Mike. You're going to need more food than you expect. Any time you go flying, you use up what you have, so you'll need to hunt more or get food brought more often,'' he says, giving me a worried look. ``I should've thought about this sooner, but I figured your body would've told you how hungry you were.''
This time, it really hits me. I'd known it before, but this time it's clear how different I am, not a human in a different shape.
Charlie and Shiners exchange a concerned glance before Charlie finally speaks up. ``You're still Mike, even if your body isn't. This is... well, a literally big change. Get yourself some of this soup. If you're still hungry, I can figure something else out.''
I take a deep breath and nod. It's still disconcerting, wondering how much has changed. How far am I from being human? What other surprises are still in store for me? I give a small nod. <Thanks,> I say, glancing toward the sun as it sinks toward the horizon. It strikes me again how strange it looks, but in a good way.
<Let's skip the smaller bowls for now and just give you what I can. Then let's talk. No worrying about things. Just tell us what you're going through,> he says, adding a smaller bowl for Shiners.
I lean in and give my head a small shake. Something in the soup makes my nares tingle, like I accidentally inhaled something too spicy. But it still looks and smells good. I spot chunks of meat in the broth and grab one first. It tastes good but lacks something I can't explain. The soup itself definitely helps soothe how I feel.
Shiners gives a bob of his head. <This really tastes good,> he says as I give him an odd look. To me, it somehow feels both under- and over-seasoned, not dangerous, just... weird, as I take another bit of meat. My taste buds expect more, and not just the human kind.
Charlie catches my puzzled look at the soup. <Everything okay?> he asks, sniffing the air. <It smells fine.>
I take another piece of chicken and swallow it with a bit of broth. It feels strange but warm and good. <I'm not sure,> I admit after a moment. <I'm getting mixed signals, like something's missing and something else is too strong.>
Shiners eyes the soup sideways and comments, ``Well, as I keep telling you, you're an eagle now. It doesn't seem wrong to me, but your body might feel it's missing something. Go with your instincts. Explain what's wrong.''
Charlie nods. ``I'm not sure what exactly I can do to help you, but I'm sure we can figure something out,'' he says with a worried look.
Eyeing the meat, I nod. <Don't get me wrong, I appreciate it. Just trying to explain how it feels. Something is off, but I can't explain it,> I say as I finish all the chicken chunks and a bit of the soup, feeling a little better. I turn my gaze toward the sunset. <Man, this is both beautiful and weird.>
Charlie nods, looking toward the horizon. ``How's it weird? It's just a normal sunset, maybe a bit brighter with the clouds and mountains.''
I glance toward the sky and the way it shimmers and feels different. <It's not so red and orange, but more toward the violet and blue side. It almost seems to glow in an odd way. In fact, a lot of things glow. Stuff that's already bright seems to glow instead of just reflect.>
Charlie stares at me, then at the sunset, mouth open in amazement. ``Wow, I see none of that. To me it's a beautiful sunset, but no different from what you and I have seen before. I wonder if you're seeing something different than I am. I think you mentioned birds see more into the ultraviolet range.''
I look back at the sunset and nod. <It might be. I've seen photos of how flowers look in UV, but it's not exactly the time of year to check them. Hopefully we can find a book soon. It feels like I'm missing years of education here.> I give a dry chuckle, feeling that strange mix of loss and gain as the words slip out before I can stop them. <The life I have, the life I could have lived, and the one that's gone for now.> Shiners repeats it softly, as if testing the weight of the words.
Charlie listens, and his eyes widen at my final words. I can tell it's a revelation to him, and he confirms it when he speaks. ``What do you mean, could have had?'' he asks. I realize then that I'd only ever mentioned my mom as part of the dream, not what it meant, at least not as best as I could tell.
I try to take a deep breath, trying to center myself, but it feels odd... another reminder. <I told you about my last dream, and meeting an eagle. What I didn't tell you was... she called me son, and for some reason it actually felt like I was her son, and she was my mom somehow. She mentioned that I was lost to her and then said she could give me this gift, and the next moment I was an eagle.>
Charlie gives a small gulp, taking a few moments to gather his thoughts. ``That's hard to comprehend. What does that even mean? That you were always a literal featherbrain, or something deeper? Part of me wants to deny it, but at the same time... either you're an eagle, or I've lost my mind.''
I look out to the sea, trying to comprehend everything. Even scared, there's one truth I can't ignore. <I don't know, but when she turned me into myself, it felt real. It felt right. Like I was home, and had become what I was always meant to be. This,> I say, trying to gesture toward myself a bit awkwardly, <is more real than the Mike you knew.>
The words surprise me as soon as they're out. Why did I say that? It feels true... but I'm a boy in an eagle's body. I give a small, confused shake of my head.
Charlie winces. ``More real than the Mike I knew? You're still in there, right? Obviously there are some big changes, but you still sound like yourself. Will I eventually lose you? If you're stuck that way forever, will you one day stop being human?'' He bites his lip. ``We read those werewolf books where if someone stays a wolf too long, they don't turn back.'' I can tell he's getting confused.
I nod. ``I won't ever be gone for good. I'm still me, and I'll stay me as long as I can. I mean, I still have to return those games I borrowed. And worst comes to worst, you might just have a weirdly friendly eagle that hangs around sometimes.'' I close my eyes. ``I wish I knew what the future held. I don't even know if I can become human again, or how. Shiners says it's possible, but I don't know if he means it's nearly impossible or just something that takes a long time.''
Shiners laughs. ``At this point I think Impossible is kind of your name. I could see it being hard, like what if you have to travel back home to where your nest is, assuming that was real.''
I nod my head. <Well, as long as it's not something crazy like flying to the moon on my wings, I'm willing to give it a shot. There is one hint, though. I walked past a mountain of some kind, flat on top and surrounded by desert.> I pause, thinking back. <It felt important somehow, like I was meant to remember it.>
Charlie nods. ``Flat on top could be a few places. I've seen similar ones on TV or National Geographic, but if you noticed it, it might be significant. Assuming it's not just some random thing from your dream or unrelated to turning human,'' he says contemplatively. ``Still, it feels like a start.''
I give a nod, looking at the setting sun as the sky darkens, then glance back toward Charlie's house. <So, what time are they supposed to get here?> I ask, both dreading it and feeling ready at the same time. <We should think of a plan if this fails, not exactly my usual spot,> I add.
Charlie frowns. ``They said a little after dark, so probably the next ten to twenty minutes, if not sooner. As for what to do, can't you just fly back to the fort?''
I shake my head. <I'm not sure how well I could find the spot from the air. Last time I flew it was only just getting dark, and I was already on the ground.> Something in me is nervous about the idea. Out in the open, flying over the ocean would be risky but still safer than trying to navigate through deep woods in the dark.
Charlie looks ready to say something when Shiners calls out, ``I think I see headlights at the entrance.'' We both look over and spot a car, though there's no way to tell whose it is as it rolls to a stop at the gate. A door opens, and someone steps out.
