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Thibby
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by Thibby
--- Miles struggles with his own identity. His preferences in a partner can't be found in traditional bars, but he doesn't feel like he quite -belongs- in the bars he's supposed to fit into. He feels far too old, not expressive or flamboyant enough, and missing an understanding of what he wants in life to get anyone that he feels truly comfortable with. Anyone who approaches him are met with cold shoulders and a complete lack of interest.

The usuals that come to the bar dubbed him 'Moody Miles', the hardest man to ever get with. No one's managed to land a date with him so far, no matter how many drinks they offer him. And yet, he continues to go to the same spot every night after instructing his classes, drinking himself away until he does it all over again tomorrow. It's pathetic, and he knows he's pathetic. ---

Miles is an OC I've woefully ignored for awhile.

I created his specific personality based on some of my own feelings on my sexuality, and the frustrations that had come growing up in queer spaces while not feeling quite 'queer' enough, especially as a bisexual man. While I have had plenty of relationships, there is a certain aspect to gay culture where I just simply don't feel like I completely fit into a place where I am supposed to belong.

Not that this is a dig at those who embrace queer culture, flamboyancy, and pride, far from! However, it's just not me. It's just not something I 'do', and yet I continue to expose myself to this culture by going to furry conventions, meets, engaging on the internet with queer culture. The irony is just simply not lost on me.


--- But despite how much of a sad sack of shit Miles is, he's a total bottom. Hopefully someone knows how to come along and show him a good time in a way that can make him come out of his shell! Sometimes it just takes the right person with the right chemistry.

Keywords
anthro 210,854, glasses 33,879, rat 23,022, smoking 5,849, drinking 3,724, pride 3,028, miles 1,710, unhappy 177
Details
Type: Picture/Pinup
Published: 2 months ago
Rating: General

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Nemmy
1 month, 4 weeks ago
As an older (early 40's) Autistic aroace that lives out in the boonies, I kind of feel this. I don't feel it quite as often because I've learned to deaden the feeling but I still feel it occasionally. Things get (mostly) easier when you give up on a dream and focus on other dreams instead.
Thibby
1 month, 4 weeks ago
I don't know if it's quite the same, since this is about struggling to get acceptance within queer spaces I have clear and easy access to, as opposed to areas more predominantly straight.

Not that your feelings are invalid, of course! Aroace folks have a whole different level of issues of acceptance within the queer community that I couldn't even hope to understand, and from what I've read it gets a similar ostracization from straight people as well from rejecting sexuality altogether. I hope that some day you won't feel the need to deaden any sort of feelings.



Nemmy
1 month, 4 weeks ago
I reread the description and you're right. The situations aren't the same. I think what happened was after reading it initially that it was the feeling that similar to me. That's on me for not better clarifying better. Apologies. :P

I hope so too. Thank you. c:
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