Color Practice 6: Values Only

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by Kolka

Scraps

Practices

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I spent like a month just setting up commissions and reading too much due diligence on paypal. But now I'm free to go back to my regularly scheduled training haha.

Can you actually tell what's going on in this picture? cause it looks soo blurry~ I didn't realize since I was drawing super zoomed out the entire time. it's supposed to look like a rocky beach with murky-ish water. This was probably the most fun I had doing art practice (first time drawing in greyscale too); I'm super happy with the end result, such a pretty illusion feel. Its honestly such a pretty photo, and it gives off such a strong sense of nostalgia; I took it sooo long ago, and its just been sitting in my phone this whole time.

Pretty much anything that even seem slightly nostalgic will catch my attention, in fact I feel like I'm starting to get overly obsessive with anything nostalgic, I swear I've never cared so much about saving my memories until the past year or so. And it's kinda crazy that I can hardly remember anything before highschool; I can't seem to memorize anything. When I was a kid I used to always throw away old stuff, plus I hated having photos of myself, and now I'm going insane collecting everything I have; I regret it so much, if only I could tell my past self to keep a copy of everything.

I know I didn't used to draw much, and what I did draw were mostly turned in as homework so they're all gone now (kinda stupid that I didn't at least take some photos). I remember I did a pencil drawing of the martian from war of the worlds, pretty sure it turned out super realistic too. I can still see it in my head from time to time, but not quite enough to draw it again today. Man... how much I would pay just to get the original paper back. And a giant propaganda poster that I did in highschool, probably my proudest school project, it was the last time I drew with color markers too.

Sorry im having a moment rn, just wanted to ramble a bit.

There are so many photos in my phone now; can't help but feel scared that I might want to see everything I do now 10 years later. Quite frankly I'm just scared all the time, so scared of what Ill be in the future and what I'm losing memory of every day. I feel like I used to be so much more ambitious, with big dreams about what Ill be; I've lost it all somehow, it all happened so fast; I can't help but feel guilty for disappointing myself. Maybe that's why I'm so stuck in the past all the time, I'm just scared of disappointing myself more by asking too much.

Just can't seem to get excited imagining about things anymore; I hate this feeling so much, like eternal home sickness. I don't even know what I'm looking for, but there's always this sinking memory in my head, I'm pretty sure it never even existed in my past but I still look for it like a dumbass as if it would make me feel better. I should've just done more for myself; I can't even convince myself to just stop caring so much.

Keywords

beach 26,963, painting 8,583, ocean 6,155, bridge 471

Details

Type: Picture/Pinup

Published: 4 months, 1 week ago

Rating: General

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