Mickey Ross wasn’t exactly a bounty hunter but he was, at least in a humble sense, a valued member of the community who tended to help others in need. The cute monkey boy had quite the upbringing and was wandering through life as a very gifted, smart young lad whose technical prowess allowed him to be viewed as a bit of a genius in some circles.
He was in the area when he overheard some people in distress. Being one to want to help, he found his way over to a Donut shop that looked to be covered in soot and was missing an array of its delectable snacks. By the door, sweeping the mess away was the angry store owner who had just got done chastising an employee for serving a customer that paid people in bombs.
Mickey tugged on the collar of the owner and got quite the upset face when he turned around to “greet” him.
“What do you want, kid?” He asked, his voice strained a bit.
“Who did this to your store?” Mickey asked.
“The same person who did this to the Coffee shop down the street,” The guy said, pointing just ahead. Mickey hadn’t noticed it but there was actually a bit of a line of demolished architecture in this area. Someone was causing quite the ruckus.
“--And that person would be?” Mickey continued, still having not gotten a proper answer.
The store owner sighed. “He was a green duck with a red scarf and an annoying shrill voice. Said he was on vacation so that meant he didn’t have to pay for stuff. He offered to pay in bombs and when I refused, my dunderhead employee took him up on the offer because he thought he was joking.”
Mickey’s eyes flashed with realization. He’d heard of this person before. He was a cartoonish lunatic that made everyone’s day miserable when he stopped by with a bomb he poofed from nowhere to blow you up and take your stuff.
“Bean the Dynamite!” Mickey snapped his fingers.
“You know him?” The store owner asked.
“Not personally,” Mickey answered. “But, I know a group of heroes that deal with him from time to time and I hang out with them a lot. Don’t worry mister, I’ll bring him to justice and make sure he pays for his vacation the proper way. If everyone else has to, so does he.”
Mickey then stepped his way into the street and held up his hands. “Everyone! I promise to resolve this matter post haste! Just wait and see! He’ll be paying his dues in a prison cell or worse yet, an overnight daycare, before this is done!”
He got murmurs of acknowledgement when his little speech was done which wasn’t a lot but hey, it was good enough for him. Time to find Bean.
—
Finding Bean was insanely easy. It was almost insultingly easy.
Subtle is not a word one could ever use to describe Bean and as such the line of destruction he left in his wake led him to the beachside at Emerald Coast. Mickey smiled, happy that his target was so close by.
He held in his hands a wrapped present. It was folded in shiny golden paper as a means of making sure he got his attention. The duck was currently lounging on a recliner overlooking the ocean, parts of the stores he broke into scattered around him and bags of stolen goods at his sides. He was wearing sunglasses and nodding his head up and down to a tune playing in his headphones.
Good. It meant he couldn’t hear him.
Mickey sneaked up behind Bean, his sneakers, blue jeans, and gray shirt with a picture of the science museum on it being the only thing he had on as his stealth outfit, and laid the present down in front of him, making sure to look over carefully at Bean as he did.
Bean didn’t seem to react to the white monkey in front of him, hunched over with his butt out, setting down a sparkling present… at least until the bobbing of his head made the sun catch his eye against the sunglasses at the exact wrong angle.
Bean jolted and turned to look down which made Mickey flinch. The two of them did indeed seem to lock eyes. Bean pulled up his sunglasses and blinked several times in an unnecessarily obnoxious manner before smirking. “What is this? A GIFT?! For little ol’ me?!”
He seemed excited. Mickey grinned. That meant he didn’t find this suspicious! Excellent. Then it was better to just hand the gift over.
“Yes!” Mickey smiled and stood up, presenting the box to Bean. “It’s a gift for you. I’ve admired your exploits for quite a long time and after a day of going around blowing things up for stolen goods, I think you deserve something special!”
“D’aaww! You shouldn’t have!” Bean giggled and snatched the present from the smirking Mickey, tearing away the wrapping and stuffing the shiny parts down his swim trunks for safe keeping. A little weird but whatever. The important bit was the box with the crank he uncovered.
“Oh! It’s a pop goes the weasel thingy! I want to get Fang one of these with him as the weasel inside!” Bean said, starting the crank immediately.
Mickey’s mischievous eyes narrowed. Yes. Bean was correct. However, the weasel inside this box wasn’t just going to go pop. It had a boxing glove inside it and when he finished cranking it… BAM!
Mickey smiled brightly as he saw Bean sitting there, turning the crank endlessly until…BAM! The boxing glove… sprung out of the back end and shot towards Mickey as Bean was holding it up. Bean was holding the box backwards!
Mickey’s eyes widened as he saw the boxing glove shoot towards his face. Then an explosion of stars went off as he later awoke in mid-flight through the air. “Huhhnnn? Where am I–?” He started to ask before he smashed his face against the outer brick wall that lined the beach and separated it from the nearby hotel. Cracks formed in the thick wall as Mickey twitched while pressed against it.
Bean observed the box and the glove coming out the back end and snickered. “Aww. Cute toy! It’d make an awesome prank too! Glad I thought of a neat way to get another use out of it!”
Mickey peeled his face off the wall, eyes rolling and teeth missing in his maw. He saw several stars circling around his head and heard the chirping of birdies laughing at him. He gurgled and drooled while saying “DaS mUh BoUy! He kNoWs hOw tUh pIcK dUh RiGhT gIfTsss!”
Then that section of the wall collapsed backwards and crushed him underneath it…
—
Bean was on his way to get some ice-cream and as a result was wandering down the boardwalk’s various shops to see what he could find. When he managed to find one, he stood there and stared at the store he was at for a very long time…before his eyes took notice of a teeter totter just sitting there in the middle of the street.
Curious by nature, Bean zipped over to it and stood on the elevated end of it. “Wee! I’m king of the world!” He shouted before his weight naturally made the teeter totter go down. “Aww. I need someone on the other end of this thing. I can’t teeter when someone isn’t going to totter for me!”
Luckily, Mickey was here. Rather, he was at the top of the building that this teeter totter was overlooking below. He grinned as he moved a bowling ball into place and dangled it over the empty spot where the teeter totter was. He was going to let it slam down onto the other end and the momentum would shoot Bean up into the air. When that happened, Mickey would capture him with a butterfly net he had and haul him off to his proper punishment. It was fool proof!
“That’s it… just stay right there…” Mickey licked his lips and then finally released it. The bowling ball fell through the air and landed on the empty end of the teeter totter. Mickey held out his butterfly net and swiped at the thing that shot up towards him. He caught himself… A BOMB!
Mickey’s eyes shot as big as dinner plates and he scrambled to take the bomb out and toss it. When he arched his arm back for a toss, that’s when it exploded!
The part of the building he was on collapsed a bit and his body was sent rocketing down towards the end that the bowling ball landed on. Mickey was drooling and falling through the air with his clothes all tattered. He was a giggling little dork but his rolling eyes turned into stars when he bashed his face against the bowling ball after landing on the backend of the teeter totter.
He slumped over it, twitching and fidgeting like he was humping against it or something. It was odd.
“Yay! I knew I saw you up there! Now I have someone I can teeter totter with!” Bean leaped into the air and slammed down on his end of the teeter totter with so much force that it sent Mickey and the bowling ball hurling through the air and smashing through the window of a nearby club!
When Mickey landed on his back the bowling ball slammed onto his gut and made a huge fart noise ring out that alerted all the patrons in the bar.
“HEY! He just smashed up our window!” An angry greaser dog in a black leather jacket snarled at the monkey boy. Mickey’s rolling, twitching eyes weren’t able to properly register the fear he felt as he was surrounded by these angry tough men.
The sounds of a heavy beating occurred inside the bar with a fight cloud plum being the only thing you could see inside. That was before Mickey’s body slammed against the window, now down to a torn gray shirt and a pair of light blue Paw Patrol briefs. He slowly slid down the window, leaving a trail of drool behind before he was yanked back into the fight cloud so that the beating could continue…
—
Bean was back on the beach, lounging with happiness. He was at the other end of it this time though where there were a ton of cliff-sides and dangerous animals. No one to bother was even around. He was likely out of everyone’s way.
That didn’t stop Mickey though. Standing on the top part of one of the elevated sections of Emerald Coast, he spread the wings of an air glider he made himself. He didn’t have time to go home and change so he was still in his torn gray shirt and briefs. He kind of hated that he looked so doofy now, especially since he thought he peed himself a bit during that earlier beating but whatever. This was of the utmost importance now!
Mickey ran forward and jumped off his elevated position, soaring down on his homemade wing contraption. He grinned as he was making his way towards Bean. He went to try and grab him… but the wind picked up and he ended up flying higher than he intended just inches before reaching the humming little bird.
Mickey panicked a bit and flailed about as his wing contraption got all tangled up. He tugged on the apparatus to try and get it to turn back around but his makeshift job showed it’s true colors when one yank caused it to break apart… right as he flew over the edge of a cliff.
Like the famous coyote in the cartoons, Mickey found himself plummeting down a steep cliff and slamming into the bottom of it. He left a hole shaped like his body at the bottom too. The only difference was he totally filled his briefs with a scared loss of bladder control on his way down.
—
“Here! Would you like a drink!” Mickey practically shouted in Bean’s face, holding out a tray with a single drink on it. For some reason, this monkey that Bean saw earlier looked really worse for wear. He was now in just a pair of obviously soaked and embarrassing looking underoos and the crazed look on his face along with his matted hair made him look like he’d gone a bit bonkers.
To Bean that made him his kind of people! Plus, he was being offered a drink from this guy. It looked really cool too. It was blue, had a piece of pineapple in it, kind of sparkled… and was… blue! He liked blue! It was his favorite flavor!
Bean took it happily. He didn’t drink it yet which made Mickey anxious. That drink was a special blend of his own that made the person who took it super loopy and dumb. Maybe Bean didn’t need it to be dumb but as far as being loopy, he desperately needed that!
“Oh and here! As payment for the drink!” Bean said, handing him an envelope.
Mickey was stunned. Actual money. Mickey smiled and opened the letter… then fished out a BOMB!
His sad eyes got big yet again before it exploded in his face. He was sent soaring through the air like a frisbee, eyes spinning and tongue out as he peed his already wet briefs yet again and landed in the water.
At least now no one could tell they were wet because of a bladder failure. Unfortunately for him, this beach had killer orcas in them and they didn’t take too kindly to their territory being invaded.
Seconds later Mickey scrambled out of the water screaming and running across it like Captain Hook running away from the crocodile. The killer orca that was under the surface snapped and bit at him while he cried and flailed his arms over his head. “HELP MEEEEEEE~! GYAAAAAAH!”
Eventually, it clamped down on his butt and Mickey let out a breathless scream this time. He was swung back and forth like a chew toy before he was spat out and sent rocketing over the horizon… back over the edge of the earlier cliff and spiraling down it to land hard against the ground.
There were now two Mickey shaped holes down there.
—
Mickey ends up clawing his way back to shore with nothing but a long stick to hold his battered body up. He then sighs and collapses with his tongue out and butt wiggling about like jello. His soaked undies had tears in them now too.
“Aww. Are you tired buddy? Thirsty maybe? Here, have a drink!” A voice offered.
Mickey smiled and reached his hand up, gladly accepting whatever was put into his hand and gulping it down. He sighed and tossed it away before stumbling to his feet… and then felt a pang of weirdness overcome him.
“Th-Thank you st-stranger… I wasss feelin’ kind of downnn…?” Mickey slurred his voice before his eyes crossed and his tongue flopped out his mouth in a derpy smile. He felt really dumb and loopy.
“No problemo!” Bean smirked as he stood in front of Mickey. “I got this drink from my new special friend but I figured I’d share it with you.”
“Taaank yooouuu~! Tee heeee~!” Mickey giggled, swishing his crotch back and forth while pressing his hands to his cheeks like a goober.
“Oh don’t thank me. Thank those lovely greaser dogs in that club over there for giving me the idea! Here! Take this bat with you so that when you enter, they know you’re thankful and want to play a rousing game of baseball.” Bean said, handing Mickey the bat in question.
“Yaaay! Basebaaaaaall!” Mickey gurgled and swung the bat around carelessly while stumbling like a drunk back to the club he got beat up in. When he came stumbling in doing that the result was the same.
The fight cloud that happened before his now naked body was shown slamming against the window before he was yanked back into it may have instilled a sense of deja vu in anyone who witnessed it twice.
—
Mickey was now butt naked and he looked demolished. He had a gap in his teeth, his hair was messy, and he had a black ring around one of his eyes. But despite the fact that Bean was bothering no one but him he wasn’t stopping! This was personal now!
Mickey was in an elevated position at the beach and saw Bean walking back on to the main Emerald Coast beach with a ping pong paddle. Why did he have that? Because he was trying to swat water droplets that came at him from the ocean back into the drink. Whatever. He was weird like that.
The important bit was that Mickey had a muscle relaxing dart and he was going to fire it at his butt! Mickey snickered sort of evilly as he took aim and shot it at Bean.
However, Bean turned at the last second and the dart hit the paddle. It bounced off of several umbrellas on the beach before it landed in the most undesirable spot… Mickey’s butt.
Mickey froze and his eyes twitched. He swooned a bit as his eyes fluttered and his tongue poked out again. His naked form fell over and landed hard into an empty baby carriage. The items in it flew up and then fell down on top of him.
Landing almost perfectly on him was a baby bonnet, a pacifier on a string that went over his head, and an unfolded Dora the Explorer diaper right over his crotch.
Bean made his way over to Mickey and looked inside the carriage. “Uh-oh! Emergency! We’ve got ourselves an undiapered baby here!” Bean said, looking at the little boy sitting on the towel beside the carriage. The young puppy boy sat confused. His mom had taken his baby brother out of the carriage to go change his diaper in the bathroom before that monkey fell into it and now this weird duck was talking to him about changing HIS diaper?
Okay! Sure! Sounds fun!
The five year old doggo stood up and helped Bean drape Mickey along the towel in the sand. Bean grinned and raised up Mickey’s butt before asking for items he needed.
“Wipes!” Bean held out his hand and was handed the wipes. Mickey’s butt was cleaned off while Mickey groaned and swooned on the ground, blushing as the sensuous touches made him a bit excited.
“Oil!” Bean asked. The boy handed him the oil and got Mickey’s butt and front cleaned.
“Powder!” Bean asked. The boy gave him the powder and sprinkled it down in a manner that made Mickey sneeze. That seemed to put some sense back into him however.
“H-Hey! Stop right now!” Mickey snapped, attempting with all his might to sit up.
“Anesthesia!” Bean asked. The boy handed Bean a large cartoon mallet. Bean raised it and slammed it over Mickey’s head.
Mickey jolted and his eyes rolled as he slumped back onto the ground.
Then Bean happily finished properly diapering the boy up. He grabbed Mickey by his armpits to hold the drooling, cross-eyed idiot boy up and made kissy faces at him while walking off. The young dog boy waved goodbye as he saw them leave.
“D’aaww! How sweet! I wonder what’s best to do for you now!” Bean asked, admiring his new baby. He then got an idea. “I know! A bottle feeding!”
He then shoved something into Mickey’s mouth and dropped him on the ground before walking backwards. Mickey suckled on the thing in his mouth, too dazed to be cautious about it… until he heard the hissing sound.
His eyes widened and looked down at it, noticing that there was indeed another bomb in his maw. He whimpered as it exploded and sent him soaring through the air again. He peed his newly acquired diaper right as his head slammed through a mailbox.
He was stuck inside of it. His head poked out of one end, eyes rolling, tongue out, and birdies circling his head. His diapered butt humped up and down while dangling out the other end. The red flag was pointed up too.
Bean sauntered on over to Mickey and licked a stamp before slapping it against Mickey’s butt along with a destination note. He then walked off, whistling a happy tune to himself.
The destination read “To Sloth Sitter’s Overnight Daycare”.
