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Jaredthefox92
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Toyhammer Part One: The New Model

Toyhammer Part Two: The Tiny Observer
toyhammer_part_one_for_ao.rtf
Keywords male 1187471, female 1077241, males 43006, woman 29112, fantasy 26721, funny 10174, crossover 8288, humor 5861, fighting 4823, toys 4733, action 4300, comedy 4032, men 3876, fanfiction 2978, combat 1250, bugs 752, stories 361, insects 263, multiplecharacters 241, warfare 133, warhammer 40000 65, space marine 62, army men 19, astartes 14
Bravo Company was on yet another top secret and classified mission in the Real World. Colonel Grimm had dispatched the commandos and Captain Blade to scout the attic for what reconnaissance reports could only confirm as "giant armored men". It was speculated by Green Nation high command that these were in fact more superweapons that should they fall into General Plastro's hands would cause the situation to become most dire indeed.

Captain Blade's helicopter flew in through the window as the sun would glare off the green windshield. While Sarge and Vikki were rather used to being shuttled by the captain, the rest of Bravo Company wasn't so much used to flying. Scorch and Hoover in particular almost lost their lunch when Blade had to make evasive maneuvers to avoid the wasps nests near the shed.

"So what's the plan Sarge? I just drop ya'll off and you take it from here?" Blade yelled in the back of his cockpit.

"Yeah yeah Flyboy, just keep us out of enemy fire. Grimm wants us to recon the attic for these classified 'super soldiers'. It could be trouble" Sarge yelled back to Blade.

"Copy that, you just make sure Vikki, er I mean the rest of your company make it out on one piece" Blade replied back with a laugh.

As the green plastic helicopter would enter the window things for the most part didn't look so messy as usual. There was clearly signs of Human Giant activity. As the room looked relatively clean and tidy with even signs of what looked like large artifacts and resources being used for something. Still, Sarge knew better than to trust his eyes above in a flying helicopter. The Tan Menace always had sneaky ways of ambushing his team.

"Looks clear down there Sarge. I'm going to set her down in that clearing over on the table, over!" Blade said as he would can on his radar for any sign of Tan or Insect hostiles.

"Just don't make it near any spiders this time, I hate spiders!" Sarge bawked back.

"None to worry, I see a few cobwebs up in the ceiling but that's about it. Prepare for landing!" Blade called out to Bravo Company.

"Copy that! Look alive Bravo Company, it's showtime!" Sarge said as Vikki and the rest of the boys cheered.

As the green plastic UH-1 helicopter would slowly land, the Greens would not notice as off in the distance they were secretly being monitored by a pair of blue plastic binoculars. While Blade was partially right and the landing zone was clear, it wasn't that the attic was completely clean of Tan or should it be said Blue presence. Fortunately for the Bravo Company Commandos, they were not at the same table. Unfortunately, the Tan were up to a salvage operation as they would be lifting up and hauling sprues for some unknown reason.

"This is Agent Azul to Tan High Command, Tan High Command, do you read me?" the Blue Soldier called over his tiny plastic radio.

"Yes I read you Little Man, this is General Plastro. Do you have any important news for me, hmm?" Plasto said over the radio.

"I-I've caught sight of a green helicopter that just entered the window. It could be Bravo Company or another unit entering the attic!" Agent Azul replied to Plastro.

"WHAT?!? NO NO NO NO! I cannot let those little green buffoons' and Sargent Hawk anywhere near MY excavation site! Find a way to distract them or get them away the new secret weapons, AT ONCE!" Plastro said.

"Y-yes sir! I'll see what I can do! Agent Azul out!"

The green helicopter would come in for a landing on the table with what looked like a green hobby mat. However, there was an issue. Blade had to land away from the Loctite Super Glue cannister lest his chopper get stuck and downed to the floor! As the helicopter slowly descended he would keep an watchful eye of puddles of glue on the gigantic green hobby mat.

"Careful down there Sarge. Ya'll don't want to get your boots stuck in that glue. Let me tell ya that right now! Got glue all over the LZ!" Blade informed them.

"Copy that, we'll watch our step" Vikki replied to the captain.

The green plastic tory helicopter would hover slightly above the mat as Sarge, Vikki, Scorch, Hoover, Riff, Bullseye and Thick would all have to carefully leap off and deploy as to not get near any puddles of glue. This was especially hard for Thick, but Hoover's caution and paranoia actually played for the better for once as he would go last and make sure everyone got on the ground safely. Of course Sarge being himself would be the first to leap off the helicopter and into the thick of it, followed by Vikki, then Scorch, Riff, Thick, the finally Hoover.

As soon as they landed Sarge would kneel and make ready his rifle, as would Vikki with her pistols. This was followed by Scorch with his flamethrower, Riff with his Bazooka, and Thick who just followed the others. Meanwhile, Hoover would hide behind the others as usual in fear. There was an unnerving calmness around the table, no signs of Tan Republican forces or even insects for that matter. Something was defiantly amiss.

"Alright Bravo Company, stick with me and make sure to cover your rears. We need to search this place for these alleged 'Super Soldiers'. Hopefully they'll be on our side and not painted by the Tan just yet" sarge demanded of his company.

"Sir yes sir! Scorch, Riff, Bullseye, and Thick replied"

"Uh, okay..sir" Hoover replied rather sheepishly.

"You got it, Sarge" Vikki replied.

"Alright then, Bravo Company, move out!" Sarge said as he looked around.

The pathway was rather treacherous, one wrong move and their feet would suddenly become permanently glued to the ground! Fortunately for Bravo Company, it seems a lot of glue splotches were old and already dried up. With what clearly looked like giant sized fingerprints stuck to the mat here or there.

However, as the team would search around they would find odd giant grey sprues, these sprues seem however were cut apart already and used. Upon the sprues they could read the word "Games Workshop". None of them knew what this meant other than it sounded like another store that would perhaps be a deathtrap to the team. Still, Bravo Company would motion for Captain Blade to lower his winch to haul off these gigantic grey resin sprues. Plastic was plastic after all and could be used for the Green Nation's economy and war efforts.

Sarge would motion like a traffic cop or construction worker for Blade to lower his chopper's wench before Bravo Company would help attach the cable before the grey sprue was gently hoisted above. They would all step back as Blade would would ascend in the air before turning the helicopter back and fly towards the window.

"Looks like 'Flyboy' will be busy hauling that plastic back to HQ. So let's get a move on" Sarge demanded.

"Oh, and watch for more glue" he said as he would take out his binoculars and scan around the vicinity of the table.

The Greens would begin to slowly creep around the gigantic bottle of Loctite glue as they would commence their search for whatever was connected to the sprue. Sarge hoped that the boys at HQ would be able to figure out just what was connected to it and give them further intel on their objective. However, that would take some time and time was one commodity the commandos did not have.

As they would search around they would find some rather disturbing finds. Scattered around the table were massive boxes showing horrible depictions of large monsters that read the words 'Orks' on them. While it was somewhat relaxing that they were shown to be green and not tan, it nevertheless show these 'Orks' were possessing massive firepower.

"Ugly mugs, hopefully HQ will be able to tell us if they're friendly or not" Sargent Hawk said as he muttered at one of the boxes.

"Sarge, look!" Vikki said as she would point at what looked like huge vials of various colors, green, blue, gold, and even...tan.

"We got to be careful. You know what happens when we deal with paint" Riff replied to the two.

"Mmmhmm, we'll get command to help us get rid of that tan paint once we construct and HQ. For now we need to find the super soldiers. Hopefully they're on our side, for now" Sarge said.

"No Tan in sight, maybe we got lucky with this house 'aye Sarge?" Scotch remarked with his Boise accent.

"Don't count on it" Sarge replied.

"Wait, everyone stop!" Vikki suddenly said as she would motion for everyone to get down and get alert.

At this the entire team would get alert and get once more back into battle formations. However, Vikki would then point to something off in the corner..it was a cockroach. Normally, this would be cause for alarm and fighting, but it appeared to be dead as it's buggy guts were splattered all over the table.

"Roaches, great" Bullseye remarked.

"Well, every house has them these days" Sarge snidely remarked.

"I'll be the judge of that" Bullseye said as he would peak through his plastic optical scope.

"It's dead alright, but it has some huge bullet holes. Whatever killed it had some serious firepower" Bullseye said.

"Think it's one of those 'Orks'?" Riff asked.

"Dunno" Bullseye replied.

"How about you boys let a girl go over and check it out?" Vikki asked.

"Oh no, you ain't leaving our sight another time" Sarge remarked.

"Fine, you can come with" Vikki remarked to Sergeant Hawk.

"The rest of you hold this position, we'll see if we can kill anymore pests" Sarge said brazenly as Vikki would not and they both would slowly proceed towards the deceased insect.

"Watch it, where there's one roach, there's more" Vikki replied.

"Yeah, we may have stumbled onto a roach motel" Sarge said.

They would slowly creep up to the dead roach, only to fine another one and even a third lifeless there. However, from the looks of things they were executed with extreme prejudice, with some of them even missing their heads! Whatever, or whoever had slain these insects did so with great ferocity.

"Looks like pest control already came here" Vikki remarked.

"Not sure if they made our job easier, or harder" Sarge replied.

"Just look at the size of these bullet holes, they go right into the table. Whatever weapon they were using was really strong" Vikki stated.

"Reckon was the Tan?" Sarge asked her.

"Sure hope not" Vikki replied.

*Skitter*

Both Sarge and Vikki would then look up to see a startling sight, there was a cobweb. That meant, where there was a cobweb, there were spiders. At this both of them would load and make ready their armaments' with Sarge and his rifle and Vikki and her duel pistols.

"I guess it's meal time!" Vikki said now rather concerned.

"Don't remind me! Just shoot the thing!"

A black massive spider would soon begin to lower down the cobweb as the two toys would begin to fire at it and try to take cover. They would hear a shriek as the spider would leap down but fortunately they would have stepped back not to be caught under it. Still, it was fast and they had to begin to pour rounds at it.

Sarge's rounds would miss their mark sadly, and to compound matters the spider had taken notice of Vikki's comparably more creamy and lighter plastic body decided she was it's next victim! It would then suddenly begin to rapidly skitter towards her as she had to reload.

"Sarge!" Vikki would call out to him

"Vikki! Hang on!" Sarge would try to reload and get a shot at it.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Suddenly, shots from a large caliber weapon could be heard on an adjacent stacks of boxes. Blasts from another shooter targeting the spider would be fired at it and within moments huge rounds of weaponry would go right into the bug's head and explode it! This would cause Vikki to understandably cry out as bug guts got all over here, and would prompt Sarge to look up in response only to see a large, armored blue man aiming a really big pistol at the spider.

"SCREEACH!" the spider let out as it would turn around to try to shoot web at Sarge, as he would begin to notice and leap under behind a bottle of paint.

At this, the mysterious large armored blue man would begin to leap down from the box and onto the table with two loud boot thuds. What next Sarge could only describe was ludicrous. The sound of a roaring chainsaw could be heard, but from the sounds of things it was in the weird spiked sword the being was wielding as it wasted no time to charge right at the spider!

"For the Emperor!" the being said in a posh accent as they would dash at an unbelievable pace right up to the bug before slashing at it with the buzzing sword.

(Author's note: Dawn of War 2 "Angel's of Death" theme plays here: www.youtube.com/watch?v=blCBoXKCGl0 )

The sword would in one fell swoop, decapitate one of the spider's eight legs as it would scream and reel back. As it's bug guts would splatter all over the armored man it would try to jab it's other legs with a pincer attack at them. Fortunately, the armored being would sidestep and in another slash cut these appendages as well. The spider would let out a haunting shriek, but this would only prompt the sword wielder to charge right at their head and proceed to slice off it's head. Sarge and Vikki didn't know if this being was hostile or not, but even they were worried that they were singly handle able to slay an entire spider by themselves.

VRRROOOORRRRROOOM!

Within moments the spider would screech it's last moments of life before it's head would be cut clean off of it. This would cause the body of the spider to go limp and eventually topple over. Tension would feel the air as the spider would lay dead for these brief moments. Vikki would try to slowly get back up as Sarge had his gun ready.

"Easy big guy, we just want to talk" Sergeant Hawk said towards the armored being.

"Who are you?" the larger and armored blue being replied under their blue and red painted helmet.

"Sergeant Hawk, Bravo Company Commandos. We're in the Green Nation Army" Sarge replied.

"I see, I am Lieutenant Titus of the Ultramarines" Titus said as he would slowly disengage his chainsaw sounding sword.

"Ultra-marines?" Vikki said as she tried to breath and regain her composure.

"That is correct. I am of the Ultramarines Chapter of the Adeptus Astartes. The Sons of Ultramar, the Sons of Roboute Guilliman and the Emperor" Titus replied.

"That's uhh, great" Sarge simply remarked, cluelessly.

"So um, Mr.Titus. Thanks for rescuing me, er us back there" Vikki replied.

"Thank nothing of it, this foul xeno had to be dealt with. You two fought bravely and stood your ground" Titus stated.

"I reckon you're not with the Tan or the Blue, are you?" Sarge asked.

"No, I am with the Imperium of Mankind" Titus said.

"Mankind, you mean the giant humans?" Vikki remarked.

"No, but I'm afraid we must cut our talk short. I must regroup with my own squad" Titus said as he would slowly begin to stomp over to the boxes and begin to climb up them.

"Wait! Perhaps we can help you? Brav-er, we have nearby help. Strength in numbers and all" Vikki said.

"Yeah, I mean where there's one spider there's more. Besides, seeing as you're not what I'd call one of General Plastro's 'goon', I guess we could help each other out? What'd do you say?" Sarge asked, quite frankly impressed by the Astartes.

"Very well, for now we may aid each other until I can regroup with my battle brothers" Titus remarked.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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A crossover fanfiction between the old Army Men series, and the Warhammer 40,000 universe with a twist: It takes places in 'our' human world!

(Note: The following is a crossover between the old 'Army Men' series created by 3DO and the Warhammer 40,000 universe created by Games Workshop. It takes place in an real world AU after the events of the Sarge's Heroes 2 game and timeline, as well as has events after Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine mentioned.

 

I neither claim to own any of the characters or IP's as this is a fan made crossover fanfiction. It's for fun and pure nostalgia, enjoy!)

Notes:
I have tried to remain faithful to both series. As such the story will have 'silly' Sarges Heroes like moments and grimdark Warhammer like moments.

This series is a WORK IN PROGRESS.

I will try to remain faithful to the characters, (I am only one writer and it's been years since Army Man was available).

This series will incorporate lore and themes from both universes.

Keywords
male 1,187,471, female 1,077,241, males 43,006, woman 29,112, fantasy 26,721, funny 10,174, crossover 8,288, humor 5,861, fighting 4,823, toys 4,733, action 4,300, comedy 4,032, men 3,876, fanfiction 2,978, combat 1,250, bugs 752, stories 361, insects 263, multiplecharacters 241, warfare 133, warhammer 40000 65, space marine 62, army men 19, astartes 14
Details
Type: Writing - Document
Published: 1 year, 3 months ago
Rating: General

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SlimTheSlick
11 months ago
Oh hey!!! It’s rare to find Army Men fanfiction and a crossover to boot! Even rarer it’s based upon the Sarge's Heroes/Air Attack spinoffs. I eagerly await to see more 👍
Noah888
7 months, 2 weeks ago
Army Men was a huge part of my childhood.
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