Ralsei had been a prince at one point; a little lord reigning over a very small village he had called his own. He missed the world he came from at times but he loved the one he currently called his own even more.
Or maybe he did...
It was hard to tell at times.
He leaned against the railing of the little balcony that he called his own, looking out upon the city stretched out before him. It was like the cybercity but far more dreary, grey and dark in the twilight hours with harsh whites and yellows keeping it alight.
In his hand was a cigarette, the tip glowing and slowly advancing towards his fingers. He took a drag and held it for a moment before letting it out in a billow of ashen smoke. The nicotine felt nice, calming, settling the maelstrom of emotions within his mind.
It was hard to leave a world of magic, where candy literally grew on trees and homes could be materialized from the ether. It was even harder when you instead went to a world where a shitty apartment cost half his paycheque, bills cost a quarter, and what little was left over never seemed to go far enough.
What was the point of staying?
Those harsh realities and equally valid worries seemed ready to crawl up and besiege his mind but he kept them at bay by taking another puff of his rapidly shrinking cigarette. It was the last puff he could manage before he ground the butt out into a cup of sand.
The door opened next to him and he glanced over, seeing Kris come out.
They flashed a tight smile as they leaned against the railing as well. There was a whipped cream gun in their hands.
``How are you holding up, hun?'' they asked.
Ralsei shrugged. ``Been better, been worse. Just... stressing.''
``You're pretty good at that,'' Kris replied, nodding towards him. ``Anything I can you help with?''
Ralsei mulled it over for a moment, working his jaw. He then shook his head.
This wasn't one of the problems that could be solved with talking. If it were then it would've been taken care of a long time ago.
``How's Susie?'' he asked.
Kris smirked. ``Just sitting down for a moment.'' They wiggled the whipped cream gun. ``She might've taken one too many hits.''
``You really shouldn't leave her if she's like that,'' Ralsei grumbled.
``She's done these before and she'll do them again in the future,'' Kris replied. ``Plus, I'm more worried about you than her right now.''
Ralsei smiled, feeling a hint of red enter his cheeks. ``T-thanks.''
Kris slid over, leaving little room between them. Their presence was nice with a comforting heat wafting off of them.
It also seemed to be more effective than nicotine at taming Ralsei's mind.
``Nice skirt,'' Ralsei commented.
Kris grinned. ``Thanks. I think I nearly gave some boomers at the grocery store a heart attack by wearing it.''
Grocery shopping.
Another dollar poorer.
``Any good sales?'' Ralsei asked, trying to hide their frown.
Kris seemed aloof to his anxiety or at the very least didn't comment on them.
They simply nodded instead. ``Kraft Dinner was half off so our lunches are going to be a lot cheaper for the rest of the month.''
A minor victory but one that took a little bit of the edge off of Ralsei's whirlwind of anxieties.
``How about you come back inside and we do something to help take your mind off things?'' Kris offered.
Ralsei forced a smile. ``S-sure.''
Kris took the lead, going back into their little apartment with Ralsei following behind.
Susie was vegging out on the couch with a dopey little intoxicated smile plastered upon her face. She nodded towards Ralsei as he came inside.
``How are you doing, babe?'' she asked.
Ralsei shrugged. ``So-so...''
``So-so is better than bad,'' Susie said.
She then patted the spot beside herself.
Ralsei took the hint and came over, plopping down beside her.
Susie rewarded him by draping a powerful arm over his shoulder and holding him close. She was so warm, so comforting and soft, just like Kris.
His partners...
They were the singular reason he had left his little princely state and remained here. And honestly, they were the only thing that made working his dead-end job and struggling through classes worthwhile.
Kris was just so confident and handsome and Ralsei couldn't imagine a life without their charm. Susie was much the same though her warmth and ruggedness were something that Ralsei couldn't endure without. If it weren't for them, he didn't know what he would do.
Probably return to his realm and lead a lonely existence.
``Ran into Jockington on campus today,'' Kris commented.
Susie snorted. ``No way, what's he up to these days?''
``Would you believe me I told you he's getting a bachelors in theology?'' Kris replied.
Susie actually cackled at that. ``No fucking way.''
``For real, the dude looks like a proper Born-again Christian, all well dressed with this short little WASP-y haircut,'' Kris said, slowly shaking their head. ``At least, he wasn't a prick about uh... my stuff. I was dressed pretty femme when I saw him.''
``If he was a prick, I'd kick his fucking ass,'' Susie chided.
``You won't be kicking anyone's ass, babe,'' Ralsei teased. ``We couldn't afford the bail.''
Susie snorted. ``Fair.''
Kris plopped down into a lounging chair and reached for the table, grabbing another cartridge of nitrous oxide and popping it into the whipped cream gun. There was a hiss as it filled the chamber. Once finished, they then placed the stem into their mouth and compressed the trigger.
There was another hiss as they started to inhale the gas, shivering as they did so.
Soon, a dopiness dominated their complexion as they drew the gun away and offered it to Susie.
Susie took it but instead of taking her own hit offered it to Ralsei instead.
Ralsei was more than happy to take it for himself.
After all, if there was anything that could make the sickly anxieties fade away, for even a moment, it would be this. He could always count on drugs and highs to make life a little more bearable.
His hands moved quickly and with a familiar precision, recharging the gun and bringing it to his lips. He exhaled, until his lungs were nearly empty, and then promptly inhaled the gas, filling his lungs back up until he couldn't handle anymore.
Then he counted.
One.
Two.
Three.
Four.
Four...
Three...
Red...
...
???
Numbers and concepts no longer made sense, so he knew that this was his cue to exhale and allow the high to come washing over him.
Everything mostly just felt numb. But it was a good kind of numb, one that made his arms and legs kind of tingle. His mind felt like it was removed from his body, floating free and breaking away from all of the petty little anxieties that tried to keep him pinned to the earth.
Though sadly the high started to fade far too quickly and he returned to his body soon enough. Still, the tingle and brief bout of euphoria were both very nice.
They made him smile.
He leaned even more into Susie's comforting presence, nestling himself against her.
``You kind of quiver when you take a hit,'' Susie commented.
Ralsei cocked a brow. ``I do?''
``It's cute,'' Susie said, patting him on the shoulder. ``You're cute.''
``I try,'' Ralsei teased, sticking out his tongue.
Kris grinned. ``So, I have some pretty good news, guys.''
``News about student aid?'' Susie asked.
Kris nodded. ``They're planning on giving me an extra grand a semester.''
``Hell yeah!'' Ralsei beamed. ``That's like an extra two-fifty a month we can work with.''
Another lifeline, another anxiety held at bay for just a little while longer.
``Does that mean we can afford the flavoured ramen now?'' Susie joked.
Kris nodded. ``Might even be able to get some eggs and vegetables to put into it as well.''
``Truly living like kings,'' Susie ribbed.
Ralsei chuckled. ``If only I could bring a cauldron into this world.''
``God that'd be amazing,'' Susie said, sighing fondly. ``You're like the best cook that I know.''
``Turns out it?s really easy to do when you can just use magic,'' Ralsei murmured.
He closed his eyes and placed a hand upon Susie's stomach.
Her grip tightened a little, cradling Ralsei even closer to her powerful form. It was nice to feel like this, nice to feel loved and not alone.
Sure, he may have once had a princely state but until they arrived it was a domain of one. Truly a lonely place to rule.
His mind remembered a line from a play, where an old king was desperately looking for a horse and offering any willing volunteers increasingly large fortunes for one.
My kingdom for a horse, my kingdom for a horse...
Except for Ralsei, that had been his price for friends, for partners and lovers.
He gave away his kingdom for these two.
Hopefully, they were worth it.
He winced even thinking about something like that.
``Everything okay?'' Kris asked.
Ralsei cracked open an eye, only to realize that it was now wet. He reached up and wiped at it, clearing away the moisture.
``Yeah uh...'' he sighed. ``Bad brain.''
Kris nodded. ``Anything we can do to help?''
Ralsei hummed and looked over to the empty spot next to him. He patted the seat, ushering for Kris to come over.
Kris did so, plopping down and cuddling him from the other side. They were also so warm and soft, their very presence being the definition of good vibes.
``I...'' Ralsei sighed. ``I just worry a lot.''
``You worry enough for the three of us,'' Susie teased.
Kris nodded.
``Like about money and the future and how our relationship is going to pan out,'' Ralsei said. ``There's just so many variables to worry about.''
Kris drew in a breath. ``A lot of heavy topics that never really have any easy answers, huh?''
``Yeah,'' Susie agreed.
Ralsei nodded mutely.
``Maybe it'll help if we talk about something else,'' Kris suggested.
Ralsei snorted. ``Worth a shot.''
Kris drew a little bit away. Not so far that it felt like they were abandoning Ralsei but just giving him enough room to breathe.
``So,'' they started, ``when is Berdly finally going to crack?''
Susie chuckled. ``Hopefully soon.''
``I'm going to give him at least until the end of the semester,'' Ralsei teased.
``Like I was talking with Noelle,'' Kris started. ``And apparently he's starting on this like quasi-femboy phase. He's wearing skirts and make up and stuff.''
``Cute,'' Susie chided, flashing a toothy smile. ``I want to see pictures!''
Ralsei snickered. ``I bet he looks adorable in a dress.''
``Oh totally,'' Kris said, motioning with their hand. ``Like imagine the kind of hand-me-downs that Noelle is going to give him.''
Susie snickered. ``Berdly is so doomed.''
``I guess we'll find out if estrogen can really fix `him','' Kris joked.
``Did you know that Noelle has apparently done coke?'' Susie asked, glancing at Kris. ``Learned that the other day.''
Kris drew in a breath. ``No way.''
``I mean isn't she in one of those like sorority houses?'' Ralsei commented. ``Those places usually have at least one girl who can get their hands on all the fun drugs.''
``But Noelle and coke just don't seem like they really belong in the same sentence,'' Susie said.
Kris nodded. ``It's like a peanut butter and pickle sandwich.''
``Hey, hey, hey,'' Susie chanted, throwing a playful glare in Kris' direction. ``Let's not go insulting my dietary habits now.''
Kris couldn't help but laugh.
``Speaking of drugs,'' Ralsei said. ``I uh... I think I finally found a guy who can sell us some acid.''
Kris grinned. ``Hell yeah.''
``And it's pretty cheap too. Only a couple dollars per tab,'' Ralsei said.
Susie nodded. ``How soon can you get some?''
``This weekend?'' Ralsei shrugged. ``Still getting to know the guy.''
There was a pause in the conversation, a moment of silence. Usually, this would be the enemy, an opening for all of those pesky negative emotions to flood into Ralsei's psyche and create a bounty of bad vibes.
But for once they stayed at bay.
It was... strange...
``How are you feeling now?'' Kris asked.
Ralsei bit his lip. ``A little better, I think.''
``Hey, we take those,'' Susie said, grinning nice and wide. ``Don't want my favourite femboy being in the dumps.''
Kris smirked. ``Gossip and drug talk, the best cure for anxiety in the world.''
``I honestly think it's more about being around you two,'' Ralsei admitted. ``You uh... you make my life a whole lot better.''
Susie gave him another squeeze as she leaned over and kissed him on the forehead.
``You make my life better too,'' she said.
Kris shrugged. ``I suppose you two are pretty alright.''
Ralsei and Susie both glared at them.
``Okay, okay, maybe you're a little better than just alright,'' Kris murmured, rolling their eyes. ``Now do you two want to do anything tonight?''
Susie shrugged. ``I'm cool killing this box of whippets and watching some anime, if you two are?''
``Anime and drugs are pretty based,'' Kris said.
Ralsei nodded. ``I'm cool with that.''
Susie reached for the remote and turned on their little TV, going over to Crunchyroll. ``Okay but you two are stuck watching what I want to watch tonight.''
