Part 30: how opposites meet - a Shadilver story
Sonic covered his mouth in shock. He went speechless as he didn't have anymore words he thought would comfort Silver. Sonic went over to Silver, sat down next to them and wrapped an arm around the youngster. Silver gave in and slumped against him, as tears were still flowing. Silver hadn't told anyone before. Sonic wrapped his other arm around the youngster and hugged them tight. Silver closed their eyes and their breathing started to slow down as they were really in need of this comfort. It had been years since someone held them like that, it felt so comfortable.
They sat there for a bit as Sonic comforted Silver. After a while Silver had calmed down and pulled away from Sonics grip. Roughly the youngster wiped away their tears and took another deep breath.
After being quiet for a moment Sonic asked, ``Who knows?''
``No one.'' Silver said shaking their head.
``And Tails?''
Silver shook their head again.
``Why are you keeping this to yourself? You need help.''
``Please don't tell anyone about this.''
``I can't tell anyone, remember? But you obviously need someone to help you, someone to talk to about this,'' Sonic said with a caring smile.
``Thank you,'' Silver said monotonously. Silver sighed as they started to feel a bit better, giving the plush another hug before putting the pieces in their backpack. Somehow the youngster felt a bit relieved for telling Sonic.
``But why can't anybody know?'' Sonic asked confused.
``Years ago when I was on my own, I got help, but I got help from the wrong people,'' Silver went silent for a bit as they didn't want to tell everything, "I just can't trust anyone.''
``Why did you tell me?''
``I don't know, it just felt right at the moment,'' Silver said still monotonous as they shrugged their shoulders.
``Did you tell me everything?'' Silver went silent while Sonic waited for an answer, but after a while he knew Silver wasn't going to answer. ``I understand, you don't have to tell me everything. But just to remember that I'm here for you, if something is bothering you or you just want to talk with someone, please just let me know, okay?''
Silver nodded. ``Thank you for coming after me,'' they added with a sad smile.
``Not a problem, but I have to say, you should trust your friend, I think Tails needs to know. I won't say anything, but you owe him.'' Silver gulped and nodded slowly. Sonic stood up and held out a hand to help Silver up. ``Do you feel like you could go back to the class?''
Silver shook their head. ``I don't want to see anyone right now.''
Sonic nodded, ``I get it, just go home then. I'll tell the teacher you felt sick and went home.''
``Thank you for your help Sonic''
``It's nothing, just make sure you get better and start trusting people,''
Silver smiled a bit awkwardly and nodded.
``Get some rest, I will see you again tomorrow, okay?''
``Okay.'' Silver replied while Sonic picked up their backpack and gave it to them. As Sonic turned around to go back to class. Silver left the college ground.
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Everybody was working on their assignment during English class, Shadow and Tails looked up when Sonic entered the room. After he talked with the teacher he came over and took a seat near Tails and Shadow.
``Where is Silver?'' Shadow asked before Sonic even sat down.
``Home, Silver is just really upset at the moment. They just want to be alone for now,'' Sonic said without telling the full story.
``I feel so bad for them, that plush is really important to them,'' Shadow said.
``How do you know that?'' Tails asked curious.
``They told me,'' Shadow replied quickly, Silver had never spoken about it but he had seen them talk to it and hug it every evening when he slept in the alley watching over them. ``I just feel really bad for them.'' Shadow continued.
``As you should,'' Tails said a little annoyed.
``I know, you're right,'' Shadow thought in silence for a moment. ``Could you two maybe help me with something?''
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Silver dropped down on their mattress, still feeling down. They pulled Bunny Bun from their backpack and looked at the pieces. They sighed deeply. ``I'm so sorry this happened to you."
Silver removed the brick from the wall and took out a needle and some thread which they have used many times before to repair their clothes with. Silver used their teeth to cut the thread as they didn't have scissors and started to repair the plush. The head was completely torn from the body. Silver sewed the pieces together, the end result wasn't done as nicely as they had hoped, but it worked.
``See, you're good as new,'' Silver said and looked at the plush. They pulled the plush close and as they hugged it one tear ran from their eye, ``I miss you mom and dad.''
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That evening Shadow went back to the alley. He silently took his place on the fire escape and looked down. Silver was reading out loud from one of the study books as the cats were looking interested at Silver. They were reading something about Friedrich Nietzsche from a very difficult philosophy book like it was a simple children's book dialogue.
``And what does not kill you, makes you stronger,'' Silver spoke with a stern voice. Silver went silent and thought for a moment. ``What does not kill you, makes you stronger,'' they whispered. Silver sat up straight and looked at the words. ``That's a good one.'' Silver said as they came to realise something. ``All the things I've been through, all of it has indeed made me stronger,'' For the very first time in days Silver smiled.
Shadow looked down while Silver realised it and smiled as well.
Silver stood up more confident. ``I should stop feeling such pity for myself. I decide who I am and if someone can't deal with it, then that's their problem. Of course I wish Shadow and I were still together, but that's probably not going to happen and I should accept that. It's time to get my head straight and have some more self-respect!'' Silver encouraged theirself. ``I'm going to take a bath,'' They said and pulled off their clothes except for their boxers and took a worn towel and flung it over their shoulder, they walked towards the canal to take a dive.
Shadow felt a great respect for Silver ``How strong you are,'' he whispered. Shadow watched as Silver dove into the water and popped up whipping their quills back and rubbing the water out of their eyes with a smile on their face.
Shadow kept on watching, it made him feel good to see Silver this way again. After a while Silver came out of the water and dried theirself off with the towel, roughly ruffling their quills. Shadow almost had to laugh out loud when Silver pulled the towel away. Their quills looked very fluffy and were sticking out in all directions. It just looked so funny.
Silver's fur was all shiny again, ``I really needed that,'' Silver said. They put on their sweatpants and a shirt and sat down on the mattress again. Looking very cozy, they lit the candle because it was already getting darker. Silver's stomach was rumbling because they hadn't eaten for a few days. Silver looked through the hole in the wall and pulled out the last can of noodles and a can of cat food. The cats immediately looked over at Silver and started to meow and bumping their heads against Silvers legs.
``You guys are always so cute when you're hungry,'' Silver laughed and gave them their food. There was some rumbling coming from the cardboard box, Silver looked puzzled and had a look. The kittens, who were a lot bigger now, were trying to jump out. Silver took them out one by one and they immediately went for the food. ``Whoops are you guys already going to eat solid food. I guess I should buy some more soon.''
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The next day Silver felt better already, of course they were still sad about Shadow and what happened to Bunny Bun, but it was time to move on.
``You look better,'' Tails said when they met in the morning.
``I feel better,'' Silver replied.
``That's good to hear, I'm happy for you.''
``Thank you,'' Silver said and smiled.
``So will you be talking with the nurse this morning?''
Silver nodded, ``Yeah I think that might be a good idea after everything that happened.''
Tails nodded in agreement.
``But I feel kinda nervous about it.''
``That's understandable. You know, it will probably be a bit like therapy so you'll probably find out some things about yourself you didn't know.''
``Yeah I think that's the part I'm nervous about.''
``Well, just be yourself, or find out what `being yourself' really means,'' Tails said with a wink. ``I'll see you at lunch,'' He said as he headed towards the gym hall. Silver turned left and went to Ms Blaze.
Silver knocked on the door and Ms Blaze opened, ``Hey Silver, please come on in,'' She said kindly and held the door open for them to come in. ``Please take a seat,'' She said and pointed at the couch. Silver went over and sat down.
Silver looked a bit nervous while Ms Blaze sat down opposite from them. She had a notepad on her lap and looked over at Silver. ``Please don't be nervous, I'm kind of nervous myself as well since this is my first time,'' she said with a smile.
``You will probably do great,'' Silver said with a slight blush.
``Thank you, well let?s get started then,'' Blaze said with a smile. ``I have to say, you look much better than I expected. How are you doing?'' she asked.
``Well I do feel better already to be honest.''
``How come?''
``Well yesterday I was reading about Friedrich Nietzsche and I read about his concept of `What does not kill you, makes you stronger'. So I started to think about everything that had happened and how I somehow got through it, it kinda gave me the willpower to move on.''
Ms Blaze closed her notepad, ``I see, I don't think you need me. You can do therapy on your own,'' she joked.
Silver chuckled, ``No I think it will be good for me to talk to you since I don't want to fall back.''
She smiled and opened her notepad again. ``It is very strong of you to be here,'' Silver smiled, ``So even though you are already working on moving on, I would really like to talk about what was bothering you before.''
After two hours Silver left, it was a really nice talk with Ms Blaze she really did ask a lot of good questions and gave them some things to think about.
