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TheHades
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Witchers Are Gay

Merry Crisis

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Geniuses.
Anyway- the canon explanation for no female witchers seemed sus to me ever since I’ve read the books 70 000 years ago so I made my own.
Hear me out.
The sorcerers responsible for creating witchers were actually all gay and only wanted to experiment on men.
You can’t change my mind.

Kaer Morhen in the background is totally taken from Witcher 3, don’t sue me pls.

PS: if you like my work you can consider sending me a sweet lil’ somethin over at ko-fi! ^^ https://ko-fi.com/minitrex

Keywords
male 1,182,115, gay 148,779, fantasy 26,564, kissing 22,468, snake 17,867, kiss 14,729, original characters 5,725, puma 3,728, making out 2,099, tongues 887, makeout 481, witcher 311
Details
Type: Comic
Published: 3 years, 1 month ago
Rating: General

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1,323 views
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24 comments

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Lnarra214
3 years, 1 month ago
lol, seems legit. Also, nice work on the castle.
TheHades
3 years, 1 month ago
Thank you!
davidjohnson
3 years, 1 month ago
To be honest, I always thought that male sorcerers doesn't exist, only females would have magic abilities. That's why the sorceresses tried to create the Witchers. :V
TheHades
3 years, 1 month ago
There are male sorcerers just like female ones, in fact the only male-only thing are witchers in canon for some reason xD
LegendaryLycanthrope
3 years, 1 month ago
It's probably because the sorcerers were misogynist or something and didn't think women could make for proper monster hunters - that usually seems to be the reason for why there's male anything and no female counterpart.
TheHades
3 years, 1 month ago
Also legit, although now that I think about it I’m not sure if it was ever specified that the sorcerers who created witchers were male-only. If they were both sexes then my theory still applies assuming none of the women were gay.
LegendaryLycanthrope
3 years, 1 month ago
Well, if sorcerers are primarily female in the Witcher universe, it could be...whatever the female version of misogyny is - it could be the mutation was created to be male-only because of men's typical superior strength, which could easily be directed as a living weapon of sorts...and would also explain the sterility - you don't want your weapons breeding out of your control, after all.
TheHades
3 years, 1 month ago
Not sure if there’s more male or female sorcerers, it always seemed pretty equal to me. And they’re sterile too, it’s not just witchers. All in all it doesn’t really make any sense the more you think about it xD Good point about the weapons breeding 👌🏻
LegendaryLycanthrope
3 years, 1 month ago
Wait, sorcerers are sterile in the Witcherverse? Then maybe it's a side effect of being able to use magic, because Witchers can use certain bits of it via those signs.
TheHades
3 years, 1 month ago
I think in the case of witchers it’s because of all the mutations they went through and in the case of sorcerers it’s because they have to sacrifice smthn for their magic. The signs witchers use are magically so weak that pretty much anyone could do them if they learned how. At least that’s how it was in the books, not sure about all the other stuff.
kaleemmcintyre
3 years, 1 month ago
TheHades
3 years, 1 month ago
👌🏻
randomfox
3 years, 1 month ago
You telling me some 70 year old Polish dude might have some antiquated notions about wamen?
TheHades
3 years, 1 month ago
Shocking, I know!
Cubba
3 years, 1 month ago
I am from Poland this is 100% accurate.
TheHades
3 years, 1 month ago
Knew it 😂 I’m from right under you after all.
damionstjames
3 years, 1 month ago
Thank you for more kissing!
Temeraire
3 years, 1 month ago
Or being sterile means you can nut in all the monster ladies you arent killing consequence free? no evil killer demon babies eating the locals o:!
CyanOtter
3 years, 1 month ago
I wanna become a witcher
TheAtomicDog
3 years, 1 month ago
Excellent bit of world building, with a dash of adult honesty, ending in proper, old school sexual humor.
DrNubsFox
3 years, 1 month ago
Are they gay? Or are Witchers just attracted to Witchers?
SonicFan34
3 years, 1 month ago
Snake and cat in school of the wolf. That illlleeeeegalll!
hollowbell
3 years, 1 month ago
gaaaaaaaaay
I love that, though, and you make a really good point.
I'd love me some lady Witchers.
But I really enjoy your explanation and of course. I love these two. They're such idiots. But they're distinct idiots from idiots like us, you know? I love that. And the fact they're. Immediately like "oh yeah. We're GAY."
God dammit.
You are just far too good at these little comics for your own good.
TheHades
3 years, 1 month ago
Thank you, I’m glad you like these two dorks xD and there is actually a Czech author who has a 3-or-so part book series with female witchers in it (the main char is a female witcher) and it works just fine. The books are only in Czech though and they do have plenty of other issues (like that the main char is a total Mary Sue) but still a pretty easy read and an interesting take on the witcher stuff.
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