hey friends! o3o
fun little pic. wasnt sure what to put on the sign, so I decided to go for this message. :) What do you think? I know the proportions are not quite right but lets say its a disproportional chibi maff. lmao still cute tho aint he.
whats been going on? I think I passed the exams. waiting to get paid properly so I'm finally able to afford something I really wanted to do. :> working on that pretty hard atm. maybe thats why there's so little art form my side Im sorry.
Actually I'm preferring to just sit around and play games, whatch yt vids or just exist as I sorta became scared of drawing again. It'S weird cuz its such an unpleasant but very familiar feeling that I thought I got rid of a while ago. Happy when being done with drawing, being proud of the result, buit then its such a drag. I mean this pic took me days cuz I barely drew any line during drawing sessions its ridiculous. x"3 Kinda sad, I felt like my art really got better over time, I mean it got, but then I decided to feel shit again and didnt really draw anything for long. or finish stuff. I had ideas but no energy you know. no motivation whatsoever. Then whatever's going on with my mind doesnt really make things better either, felt like I'm going nuts pretty much. hate it! no ground to rest on, to get back to when I was scared. Ya whiny child I know but just feels good rn you know theres something about writing these....texts lmao x3 You know I cant really shake some thoughts and they keep playing like a broken record and every time you dragged yourself out your basically just waiting for things to go shit again which most of the time actually happens then. Dunno maybe I'm just waiting for that sht to happen. Funny, right? I am very aware of it yet I wont wanna do anything about it. But the meds work, kinda quirky since even tho theyre enabling me to live my life quite normally theres always that voice in my head telling me that its just the meds that make me feel good and reality is shit which to me feels like I'm actively preventing myself to get better isnt that stupid? I'm trying to push against it tho and I'm succeeding every time I try so I feel better for the majority of one day's time at least and thats worth a lot I guess. I just have to not care so much about anything/everything. (:
maybe thats what the sign is trying to tell you know, pee off just pee off.
Anyways, pee off and have a good night <3 love you all watching my stuff, I really appreciate it, so thank you for the few views and faves I get. they make me smile :D making muff heart smile. cheers!
Keywords
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Details
Published:
3 years, 7 months ago
28 Jun 2021 22:00 CEST
Initial: 72a39eb084f99589b007e6f5b58699a5
Full Size: 79dbc17fa7da90877c71a3ad92dceabb
Large: ac1ab6c3887d588bc7edae63b59e9a02
Small: d5738203393856b591a73321e2de4066
Stats
18 views
5 favorites
2 comments
