Internally Imbued, main 08 - Does it matter?

Internally Imbued, main 09 - the best rest

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by DarlonDemonic

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Internally Imbued

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“…………”
Maybe, I cried for a long time on the bench…
…Now I’m wondering, why did I cry?
…Because I’m pregnant? What’s the point of crying for that?
…I really don’t know what’s wrong with me now…
…What am I supposed to do? I still have my adventures ahead…

I walked to the stag station, and planned to go back to Dirtmouth…
…I’m not sure why I want to go back, maybe I just think that… Maybe Jiji could help me in this situation?
I drew out my nail… but I paused when I’m about to hit the ring…
…I know, if Jiji really can help… I certainly know what does that means…
…A strong denial feeling rushing to my whole body… NO!
I threw away nail and sighed.
What… that feeling again… what’s that feeling?
That… that feeling of protecting… I hate my pregnancy so much just now! But why… Why I’m not feeling the same anymore…?
That feeling is weird… it’s warm, and covered out all the reluctant and the grudges I have.

…Perhaps…
I looked at my belly… I didn’t even dare to take a look, but now…
It doesn’t feel the same way anymore.
I placed my hand on my belly again.
…Yea, I’m pregnant, for sure… but what’s the matter?
Why would I want to get rid of it? Now I feel ashamed when thinking of it.
Why did I get mad about it…? I remind what Midwife said, I’m going to be a… mother…
I gulped, and I realized something.
Nothing has changed, only my thought… and my point of view… Having a baby… doesn’t bother my adventure, isn’t it? I’m okay with it so far, isn’t it?
…No, I’m not only okay now, but it’s also… a feeling of needing it… like it would be more suffer than walking on spikes if without it…
I blushed a bit… and accepted what my mind is thinking…
…I … I want it, I want that baby.
“……” I apologized inside my mind.
Sorry that I was thinking about getting rid of you… my…
My baby.
I bet I blushed again when I think of it… that’s… surely a magical word…

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