Some days it can feel like a punishment. As if we are drifting aimlessly and alone. Driven to our knees, bound by fears and doubts, we become trapped by questions.
" Why am I not good enough? " " Why can I not get it right? " " What is wrong with me? "
We ask these questions again and again until we're not sure why we ask at all. Until they are simply a part of us and we resign ourselves to lives without an answer.
The hardest faith I could ever swallow was having faith things would get better. That I would be this way forever. On my knees, hands clasped in prayer for mercy from the gods, from everyone, from myself.
Lonely worlds grow bitter from the windows they stare out of. Cynical hearts suffocate behind the glass, growing expectations and myths.
" The world is a terrible place. " " Nothing ever gets better. " " I'm a waste.. "
Some of us tell ourselves this, tossing prophecies on the wind to make them true. And while we apathetically resign ourselves to this... our hearts are breaking.
I do not know if you can hear me today. I do not know if you will believe me now, or tomorrow, or ever. But no matter how deep down you are. No matter how gripped you are by some truth you cannot find happiness. No matter how much your heart has broken...
I believe in you. I believe you are more than you ever could imagine. I believe you are an unwritten story, and a nameless miracle. I believe you deserve more than to be given up on, especially by yourself. I believe you're worth that faith..
And if you cannot believe that right now, if you cannot see it... it's fine....it's fine...because apathy is a shroud, and no heart ever breathed beneath a veil. But we'll be here beside you.
Take however long you need...but remember...you have all the time you need.
