Aohd returns to Hell
Aohd and Jason are sitting on the porch staring off into space. Jason looks over and says, “This is a sad day” Aohd replies, “Why?” Jason sighs and answers, “We’ve run out of weed”
Aohd nods then replies, “Yeah. But it ain’t the end of the world. You’d know it when that happens. Anyway that ain’t supposed to happen till”
Jason is excited listening but only sees his mouth moving but hears no sound because of the loud thunder. Then suddenly the sky gets darker causing it to look like late evening, and they can hear a pipe organ playing the overture from Phantom of the Opera.
Aohd suddenly freezes Jason starts to ask what’s going on but Aohd looks at him and screams, “GET INSIDE!”
Jason does as commanded. Just as a whooshing sound is heard and a portal opens. A goat that looks half dead or has been dead steps out. Followed by four hooded figures.
He walks up to Aohd and in a deep hollow booming voice says, “You have been summoned” Aohd nods then the goat turns and goes back threw. After the portal closes there is another load thunder crack before everything goes back to normal
Jason steps out and says, “What in hell was that?” Aohd looks up scared and says, “Balthazar, the head demon. I’ve been summoned” Jason nods and says, “What was with the pipe organ” Aohd getting up says, “He likes to make a big entrance. But cya later” he’s quite for a second then as he’s leaving, “I hope” He lifts up his wing says something in demon. Then walks threw the portal.
On the other side he walks up some black stairs till he gets to the top where a big throne is. Once in side he walks up to someone and says, “I’ve been summoned. I thought I was moved”
The person in front of him is someone in a grungy faded black robe who raises his hand and says, “Silent”
He’s speechless as a female phoenix is walked up to him in chains. She’s being escorted by two guards who hands over her chains to him.
The hooded figure begins talking in a hollow voice, “She has been sentenced and is being banished to earth under your watch as guardian of earth. She can only return here in certain situations.
The portal opens again with the music as they walk threw. When the portal closes there is a big whoosh and fire goes up out of it.
Jason looks at Aohd who says, “If you have an entrance you have to have an exit” All three nod.
Aohd smiles at Veda and says, “Kind of wish you didn’t choose the douche don’t you? They may of made us king and queen of earth” She rolls her eyes and says, “That will never happen Aohd. You where a bubbling idiot that use to follow me around drooling. Now I’m stuck on a shitty planet with you. They could of at least put me on Mars” Aohd replies, “Why would you want to go there. It’s a waist land” Veda nods and says, “Exactly no annoying people Venus would have been better yet. Place is hot”
Aohd shakes his head and says, “Well your here. Now and under my watch. So … If I say date me” She puts her wing up and says, “No. You won’t be blackmailing me you dork” Aohd smiles and says, “I’m the person you run to now. So who you going to tattle on me, to?” Vida rolls her eyes and says, “Get me out of this chains” Aohd laughing gets up twirling the key on his wing tip and says, “Why should I? First thing. I know your a bit of a bitch. But we’re allowed to torture infidels and by the way up here their just people. We can get in a lot of trouble for that” Vida sighs and says, “Good I’ll report you to the overlord here” Aohd smiles and kisses her cheek and says, “A mythical bird is going to go to congress and report a mythical bird”
She looks at him and says, “Never do that again” Aohd shrugs and says, “What are you going to do?” He kisses her again.
He still has the crush on her. But now is having fun because he knows she won’t date him.
He looks down and asks her, “So what did are pretty little phoenix do?” Vida rolls her eyes and says, “NO” Aohd shrugs and says, “If you tried to kill your pretty boy, boyfriend. What would you do to me? Try to kill me to become guardian?”
He looks at him and says, “It wasn’t that, and why in sector phi would I want to become guardian here?”
Aohd kisses her again and says, “Because I’m the boss here. No one comes into this planet or leaves this planet without my say” She laughs and says, “Take me out of this chains. Big boy”, in a mocking manner
Jason sits down on the porch to watch the two mostly confused. This is the girl Aohd has told him about a few times. The girl Aohd has described as the most beautiful phoenix he’s known. He’s now walking around her teasing her.
Aohd looks and says, “Vida I can’t uncuff you till I know why your in chains” She is starting to glow and says, “If you needed to know. Then they would of told you. Now unchain me”
He sits on the porch beside Jason and says, “Should I?” She looks at Jason and gasps. She then bows and says, “I’m sorry great one I didn’t realize you where here?”
Jason laughs and says, “Aohd you did the same thing” Aohd says, “Vida stand up he’s just a goat. Here their just regular people that will eat anything. I saw him eat a can of ravioli once.
Vida stands up and says, “That ain’t bad” Aohd don’t smile and says, “Can and all” Jason defends himself, “The doctor said I need more iron”
Vida sighs and says, “Aohd what else can I do. To get this off? I’ll even” She disgustedly coughs, “Do stuff with you” Aohd replies, “Tell me what you did. You know you have to” She sighs and says, “I don’t. But OK here. I killed a phoenix for blackmailing me”
Aohd sighs and says, “Nope” Jason laughs and says, “Dude just uncuff her so she can fly off and do what ever” Aohd frowns having Jason ruin his fun and says, “Where are you going to go?” She shrugs and says, “Away from here”
Aohd paces back and forth for a minute and says, “Earth isn’t really a place for phoenixes but there is a chain of islands in the middle of the ocean that is volcanoes”
She shakes her head and says, “No”, pauses, “To many of those people” Aohd sits on the porch’s step and says, “It’ll help if you told me what you did. Maybe that will help. You loved torture classes in school so I know you wouldn’t of helped one”
She shakes her head and says, “NO! NO! NO! Not me. Hell that would be the worse. Even if the person was innocent and I knew it. They where tricked into signing their life away” Aohd looks at her and says, “What? You helped a infidel?” She sighs and says, “OK here. There was this man. A nerdy looking fox. He was scared to death and kept swearing he didn't know what he signed. So I may of helped him return. They found out I did it and sent me here, as punishment because they know I hate you and having to listen to you as a boss would be the worse. So here I am”
Aohd is a little hurt knowing he never had a chance and says, “It’s not bad here. The weed sucks. But everything else is cool” Veda gives him a odd look and says, “Weed? Why would you smoke grass?”
Aohd laughs and says, “Come with me” He gets on his knees and chants something. Then there is a beam of light and a sheep walks up to him then leaves. Followed by another beam of light
Shortly after their all sitting in the living room laughing. Veda says, “This is great stuff” Aohd nods and says, “See earth is great man” Veda nods and says, “But what do I do?”
Aohd replies, “I’ve sold cars before” He then perks up, “Oh maybe you can join the penguin cult like me. They say their not a cult but you know” He winks at her. She asks quizzically, “What did that mean?”
“So what exactly do we do here? Just sit around and smoke weed?”, she asked sitting back against a wall. Aohd replied, “We have actual duties. Like for example, a fracture happens. We find it and close it. Mostly what we did there but instead on this end” She nods and says, “OK. So where do I sleep?”
Aohd shrugs and says, “I sleep in an oven he’s got this huge one down in the basement” Jason laughs and says, “You mean my furnace? That’s a old wood burner that don’t even pump heat in the house anymore” Veda sighs and says, “It is cold here some heat would b nice” Jason blinks and says, “It’s a hundred degrees outside, It’s hot as hell” Veda and Aohd both look at him blank and say, “Hell is a million degrees. A hundred is cold”
Aohd looks at her and says, “You get used to the freezing temperatures here” She nods and says, “Well I’m going to go find somewhere hot to lay at” Aohd and Jason nod as she leaves.
Then Aohd looks at Jason and says, “She’s cute ain’t she?” Jason shrugs and says, “Kind of a bitch really” Aohd looks blankly and says, “She doesn’t look anything like a female dog”
