Smoke rose though a dark, smoke filled bar. Men in suits who came back from long hours of work came to this establishment to enjoy a drink. Animated characters were the ones who served the drinks, and not the patrons of this particular bar. Or was the case, most of the time. Cartoon octopus served as bartender, making things interesting. At the other side, tables lined a stage, where regularly performances took place. All sorts of toons were present at the bar, black and white and color. White collar workers, those in the movie industry, union laborers, you name it shared the bar, laughing and conserving about their day, a ho-drum way of life in the City of Angels. They were there, enjoying some much needed R&R.
One gumshoe drank his whiskey in a table right in front of the stage. His name: Eddie Valiant. A no nonsense, cutting straight to the chase fellow, sat in his chair, swirling around hooch in a glass, contemplating what he was going to do now that his brother was murdered. So taxing on the mind it was for him to deal with such a massive blow. What a way to go, a piano dropped on him. Elsewhere in the bar, toons goofily poured liquor into shakers, jostling while Eddie brooded, hoping he could get a bit of relief from the show that was about to start.
On the other side of the bar, five weasels were sitting, smoking their cigars looking over to Eddie, silently looking over. The leader was obviously sitting at the back, wearing a light colored suit. Three of them smoked away their cigars, waiting for the show to start to crash the party, the other two cackled. One wore child like clothes and the other, a straitjacket, clearly an unhinged lunatic. He waited, still staring at Eddie, who was more fixated on his drink than the lovely performance that night. All five were sitting in a circle around a table.
``Eddiiiiiieeeee!''
A white, red-haired rabbit wearing red overalls and a blue bowtie burst through the doors calling toward the table where the gumshoe was sitting at, running, Knocking over a toon waitress, causing her to scream and spill whiskey all over a man who angrily got up to get another drink.
``Hey!'' a worker walking through the tables quickly raised his glass up in the air to prevent it from being knocked over by the running rabbit ``Watch it, rabbit!'' The weasels at their table looked over at the rabbit, running over to the front, starting to stand up, and exit the table one by one.
``She's gone! My carrot cake is gone!'' He cried out, throwing himself to Eddie's feet, clutching his lapels, burying his head into his jacket.
``Alright, alright! Calm down, now!'' Eddie slapped Roger the white rabbit across the face once and another time with the back of his hand for good measure to get him to compose himself.
``Thanks, Eddie, I needed that.'' Roger went back on his feet calmer this time.
``Now, tell me, what happened?'' He shook Roger while asking. The rabbit's eyes rolled around in his head, dizzy from the shake.
``Jessica! She's not in her dressing room she's supposta!'' Roger cried. He came down on his knees.
``Oh, no! I won't get mixed up with no toons!'' Eddie waved his hand around, getting back to his glass of whiskey and water rippling in the glass.
``Pblpblbplbplbplbplbplease!'' The white rabbit had his hands cupped, begging Eddie to help him find Jessica.
``Alright, I'll go and take a look!'' He reluctantly got up, away from the stage, moving through the table after table to backstage, up the stage stairs, and hooking right. They went across a large, rusty metal door to a corridor dimly lit by a single bulb. Both Eddie and Roger saw the brown metal door to Jessica's dressing room decorated with a star, JESSICA on it. Another toon, near the end of the hallway, was sobbing.
``What happened?'' Eddie asked, grabbing hold of the cartoon cow.
``Oh, it was terrible! Some weasels came and took Jessica!'' She was blubbering loudly.
``Weasels? What did they look like?'' He asked again. Roger was also starting to freak out, not knowing what those weasels could be doing to his lovely redhead.
They were wearing suits! One of them was wearing a helicopter hat, and the other was wearing a straitjacket!''
``Let's go!'' The white rabbit grabbed Valiant's hand, rushing into the dressing room. Looked like someone was struggling form the costumes, the feathery dresses, vaudeville costumes, littering the floor.
``Oh, Jeeepers! Jessica PBLPBLPBLPBLPBLPBLPBLPBPL!''
Somebody left a ransom note made from various cut out clipping from other fonts and magazines on white piece of paper.
Rabbit, if you ever want to see the dame again, come see us at the Acme Warehouse at 9PM sharp. No funny business or the dame gets the dip.
``Oh, it's horrible! I'll never see my lovely carrot cake again!'' Roger was starting to get hysterical again. He was turning his head back and forth, dragging his hands over his face in sheer panic.
``Calm down!'' Eddie assured Roger everything would be fine, and he would be able to track her down; despite being somewhat inebriated as he was a lot. He got up, making his way out the door. Of course, the weasels were right behind them, shuffling out, with two of them cackling wildly, waiting out in the back of the hallway, making sure to not be seen. One by one each made a beeline for the same door, Eddie and roger went through to a back alley where a car was parked in the dark.
``Eddie, are you sure about this?'' Roger squeaked anxiously that something bad might've happened to Jessica because it was not like her to miss her performances. They weren't too sure who might've been behind it, but they had to get to the Acme warehouse before nine. They had plenty of time. No time to stop by Eddie's office first.
``Yeah, you want to see Jessica again?'' He looked at the rabbit dead in the eye.
``Oh, I could die thinking about what they're doing to my honey bunny!'' His hands were once again all over the place, making more than a bit of a scene, thinking he would never see his loyal wife again.
``Psst! Youse need a lift?'' A toon taxi cab came to the front of the alley, flashing his headlights at them. Roger and Eddie covered their eyes.
``Who's there?'' Eddie demanded. It was hard to see with his eyes blinded by light.
``It's me, Benny! Get in! Where you two headin'?'' He asked.
``Acme warehouse and step on it!'' Eddie shouted, pointed to the street. Benny went peeling out to the street, making tire tracks, going to the warehouse. The five weasels were right behind them, starting the car, purring and slowly getting out as they turned on the lights as they got onto the street. Eddie was none too pleased to suspect who was behind the kidnapping of Jessica. He also had a feeling who might've had a hand in killing his brother. While Roger nervously rode, the flatfoot took out his rounded silver flask, unscrewed the cap and took another large swig. That was already several swigs he had today while at the bar to forget about the lack of assignments coming in as of late. Eddie belched, while Benny tried to ignore his lack of manners. Roger still in the front seat, sat nervously, chewing his gloved fingers, thinking all sorts of bad things happened to his beloved carrot top.
``Hey, where you goin?'' Eddie started to get a little frustrated, being sauced. Heading down the road with not many cars in the street, Benny was taking the long way to Acme warehouse, after the roads to Toontown were knocked down.
``Hey, who's drivin' here?'' benny shot right back. ``I taking you two to Acme warehouse, where you think I'm going, smart guy?'' He slouched right back into his seat and took another hit from his flask.
``Ugh! Toons.'' He grumbled to himself, making sure that Benny didn't hear him in the back seat. Not far behind, the troupe of weasels came around coming hot, pulling up. They cut in front of benny, and had to brake hard. Eddie almost spilled his liquor, and Roger cried out, grunting as Benny came to stop.
``Hey, what gives! Toons!'' The car came around, facing toward the cab, lights pointed at them. Eddie and Roger had to cover their eyes to see who it was coming out of the car. Five weasels came out, three of them held guns up,
``Hey, who the hell are you?'' Benny demanded, looking back at the unexpected passengers.
``We're your ride, Valiant!'' The boss weasel replied, walking toward the three. Their shadows closed in, as they were cackling as usual. ``This is your stop!'' Roger hid behind Eddie as they both hopped off Benny. The two were stuffed into the car, and took off, as the taxi cab started to drive away, trying to not get mixed up in bad business. He had to fend for himself and remain neutral.
``Youse guys are one yer own!'' His tired squealed, making a break for it. Benny was smart; knowing who the weasels belonged to, not wanting to get mixed up in any of that business.
Soon enough they came to a more desolate area of town, hearing the train squealing in the distance, a single warehouse stood, not very imposing, not very different from the other warehouses in that same part of Los Angeles.
``Ah!'' Eddie grumbled some more, while rising with the weasels, who for the duration of the ride really didn't say a whole lot. He finally ran out of the sauce after trying to drink away the problems of toons causing him anguish. Roger just sat there between Eddie and the most psychotic weasel of the bunch, who wore a straightjacket, and had maniacal eyes, cackling away.
Soon enough, after some time driving around in circles to disorient the two, they came to a fenced off area, in the shady part of town where many warehouses were mostly empty at this time of night, with only security guards keeping watch. Roger was nervous, whereas the gumshoe was merely vexed at the situation that they got themselves in. the car stopped in front of two large sliding doors turning off the lights, only illuminated by a lamp overhead. Large letters spelled ACME in white stenciled lettering.
``Hehe, this is your stop.'' The lead weasel one of the three wearing a light green suit, pushing the private eye and the white rabbit out of the car, poking them with their guns.
``This is Acme?'' Clearly he was not impressed with the facade of the warehouse that seemed to be like most of the warehouses in the neighborhood.
``You'll like what we did with the place, Valiant.'' The rest of the gang simply burst out laughing, as they escorted them out of the car, two others opening up the large doors to the Acme Warehouse. It was a large wooden door, sliding on a rack to open.
It revealed a large hanger sized warehouse made out of brick and stone, with the car being driven in by one of the weasels and coming into mountains of wooden crates stacked up twice as tall as the car. Roger ran around the warehouse, frantically looking for Jessica. She was not there. She would've been in plain sight of course.
``EDDIE, SHE'S NOT HERE!'' He put his hands up against his cheeks, running around in circles, going crazy. ``My hunny bunny is gone! Oh, what will we do??''
``Calm down, Roger! She gotta be around here somewhere.'' He looked around, nobody in the office upstairs. Then again, it was hard to tell through the metal office structure's thick coats of dust and grim on the windows that have accumulated over the years from simple neglect. Roger couldn't keep himself calm, nervously pacing around in a little circle. Meanwhile the weasels were stranding there, as if waiting for someone to arrive.
``What are we doin' here?'' Eddie grew impatient by the second.
``Relax, Valient! Take a load off!'' He shoved the gumshoe to the ground, where Roger joined him a few seconds later, with a great UMFF!
Out from the shadows, a figure walked in, only hearing the clacking of his shiny shoes. He wore all black, black gloves, black hat, and black sunglasses, even at night, which to Eddie and Roger, seemed rather out of the ordinary.
``Hello, Mr. Valiant.'' He said in a cool, throaty voice. ``So you came to rescue the dame? You may know me as the man who will take out Toontown for good.''
``You're Judge Doom, I presume.'' He said slightly, looking at him in a not too pleasant light. How he became in charge of Toontown, he had no idea, and didn't want to know how that came to be.
``I'm afraid my reputation has preceded me, Mr. Valiant. Perhaps you would like to see what I have planned for the dame after I dip the rabbit.'' He looked up, seeing a white rabbit in red overalls, yellow gloves, and a yellow and blue polka dot bowtie, hanging and running in the air, faster and faster. ``Look at what we have here.'' The man in back walked up to the white rabbit. ``Roger rabbit, I thought that was you. I saw that picture you were in with Baby Herman. Funny stuff. You toons are funny when you get smashed by anvils and ice boxes.'' He chuckled, going to the barrels, opening one up. ``Alright boys hoist him up!''
``With pleasure, boss!'' One of the weasels replied, grabbing the rabbit and holding him at gunpoint. They carried him up a stack of crates to a big metal hook. The weasel gang hooked him on by the straps of his overalls, as he kicked and hollered.
``Yipes! Hey!'' He cried out. ``Let me down!''
``You're going nowhere, Valiant!'' One of the weasels poked his hand drawn machine gun into his belly, making sure to keep in line. Two other weasels brought Roger while he kicked and screamed for help from Jessica, who didn't appear to be anywhere in the Acme Warehouse.
``Let's show the rabbit the way up to Tinseltown, shall we?'' Judge Doom smiled toothily, going climbing onto a cab of a large crane, hoisting the rabbit higher and higher until he was suspended a good twenty-five, thirty feet up in the air, kicking his feet madly.
``What are you gonna do to him?'' Eddie demanded, forcing the machine gun barrel deeper into his gut. The weasels were laughing heartily, still with the getaway car.
``He's gonna take a little swim in The Dip, right boss?'' One of the weasels cackled, and the rest followed, snorting along. Even from here, the smell of the chemicals was hard to stomach.
``Come on! Let me down form here, I'm afraid of heights!'' the gang just kept cackling, making fun of the white rabbit while he was helplessly dangling from the crane. It moved in lurches, moving toward some large yellow steel drums.
Judge Doom, yanked on some levers, lurching him toward some barrels that some of the weasels opened up. The color was an unholy mess of various colors mixed in it had an awful sharp and acrid smell to it. Eddie hadn't the slightest idea of what that slop was. Roger
``YAAAAAOW!'' Eyeballs bulged out at the sight of the slop, toes spreading out in shock. His blue and yellow polka dotted bowtie spun around in circles.
``Let him have it!'' He looked up at the white rabbit, hanging onto the crane with his hands, after getting off from the crane of is suspenders.
``BPLBPLBPLBPLBLBEEEEASE!'' He pleaded, but he judge was not too lenient on him, lowering him over some of the barrels of the slop, which was right at the edge of some crates. What Judge Doom did not see was a thin wire that was strung across the two walls of the warehouse, hanging a mere fifteen feet form the floor. Roger fell, screaming the fifteen feet. ``YAAAAAAAAOW!''
``Holy Smokes!'' Eddie yelled out as Roger fell, eyes widening. There was no obligatory splat or a metallic crash, signifying he hit the barrels of dip. By some miraculous save, the white rabbit, covered his eyes and used both large feet to hang onto the wire, turning them inward stopping him from going kablooey! He looked away for a moment, turning back around to see Roger hanging on by his big feet.
``OH!'' He was still visibly shaking, trying to not shake off the wire, hanging for dear life. Eddie, while on terra firma, was still held up by the weasel gang, unable to do anything about it. He was helpless, mouth agape, unable to look at Roger, in the event that he did fall to his doom.
``Good save! Now let's see how long you can last on there until you fall.'' Judge Doom got out of the cab from the other side, extending his leg to the crates on the sides. He walked long it to there where the rabbit dangled. Still dangling and finding that he was barely holding on, it was easy to make him fall. The Judge got out, of the cab, looking at the helpless rabbit. His hand extended in cross beams, all the way to where Roger was dangling precariously over the dip. He smiled, wiggling a finger only about or inch or two over Roger's pink sole, with three darker spots.
``Or we can see how long he can hold out before he takes a dive, Mr. Valiant.'' The weasels started to once again burst out in maniacal laughter. He started to scratch at the poor bunny's paw, casing him to bust out in laughed and jerk around while staying focused on the wire. Roger could already smell the very sharp smell of the dip - acetone and turpentine.
``Bwahahahahaha! Nohohohohohoho! Pblpblpblpblbplbplbplbpleeeeaaaase!'' He was starting to lose his balance as he was trying desperately to hold on and keep his legs from letting go. It was very hard for the poor rabbit to keep his grip. Judge doom leered, finding out that someone was very ticklish. With the black gloved hand stopping, the white rabbit could reposition himself to keep from falling.
``I guess I found out what to do with toons when I send them packing for Palookaville.'' The hand then extended all the way to a faraway corner to a box of feather dusters that for some reason were there. He plucked a single feather from the comb and came back around, sinisterly flashing a dangerous look through those dark shades. Very gently, the Judge ran the feather across Roger's paw, again making him to go into hysterics.
``NOOOOOO AHAHAHAHAHAHA! STAHAHAHAP!'' he pleaded, but Doom was having way too much fun to stop. He kept stroking the feather back and forth, almost causing Roger to fall into the dip. ``I'm beehehehebbin yohouhouhou!'' Eddie was looking on helplessly, wishing there was something he could do to save his partner.
``You gargoyle, he's gonna end up swimming with the fishes!'' Eddie barked from across the warehouse. He grumbled half upset half fearful.
``Exactly the objective, Mr. Valiant. I expect him to be...erased.'' He said, briefly stopping and tickling the other paw. He had to admire the resilience of the rabbit, being able to withstand all that tickling.
``Where's the dame?'' Sweat trickled from Valiant's round face, around his thick black brows.
``Oh the girl?'' Judge Doom took of his sunglasses, grinning. ``She's safe from any harm. No need to worry about her, Mr. Valiant.'' He carried on, tickling Roger's other paw, and he rocked back and forth, tears rolled out of his cheeks, sizzling as they hit the dip. He rolled to the right trying to gain just a little bit of strength to reach the wire. It was tough to when he barely had enough strength to even have his large feet hold on, let alone grab the wire with upper body.
``Pblpblpblpblpblpblpblahahahahaha!'' Roger put his hands over his cheeks, growing red in the face, the tickling didn't let up. He was stroking those paws, making them blush as brightly red as his face was.
``Don't worry! You'll join him too, private eye!'' The head of the gang mockingly said. They all snickered, poking the guns, hard into his belly.
One of the weasels - the one in the straitjacket - eagerly waddled to the barrels of acetone and turpentine, slapping his long sleeves on the crates. His eyes swirled in madness, really wanting to get in on a bit of the action. As he climbed the top crate, he reached for the rabbit, almost falling in himself. But managed to jump and wrap the sleeves around the wire, and slide his way toward Roger. Meanwhile poor rabbit was being tickled, and the Judge saw Psycho - the straitjacket clad weasel - hanging on. He then stopped, grabbed him by the sleeves, bringing him toward the rabbit's helpless paws. Already Roger was getting much more than he could handle.
He was already drooling, emitting a low cackle as he tried to reach the rabbit's paws, flailing the long sleeves around in vain. Psycho was lowered enough to reach the paws. He gave them a good inhale, as Roger was scrunching them in response to the feeling of air on his paws. He was that ticklish.
A strange compelling urge came over the Judge seeing the crazy weasel, reaching over and sniffing those pink paws. His straightjacket was a little too short for a weasel his size. A tan belly was exposed, and Doom's eyes fixed into an entranced gaze. Never keeping his eyes off the belly, the Judge got out the cab and extending his black gloved hand out to the underside of the weasel, palm side up, inching toward Psycho's tan belly, without him even knowing it yet.
The crazy weasel arched his back and squealed as a finger from the gloved hand wiggled and started to rake across the supple middle of that exposed belly. He was trying to sniff Roger's paws, but couldn't even concentrate on that, only being able to notice the electricity like sensation all over his belly. His swirling eyes rolled around as a finger glided across his belly, worming around, giggling in a high pitch. He tilted his head back and let out a big snort, while he was being tickled some more. The other weasels thought this was hilarious, of course. Doom's hand extended a little bit, making its way to the navel, a veritable weak spot. A finger slowly swirled around the navel; making him wheeze, while squirming around trying to avoid getting tickled some more. Psycho flailed, trying desperately to hold in his laughter, wriggling around not sniffing the rabbit's foot anymore. His focus instead went to getting away from that skittering finger across his belly. it was not easy to sniff paws, when the Judge made sure the insane weasel was giggling like a girl.
He then ran his tongue across the rabbit's paw in one good slurping, Roger cried out in surprise, not expecting him to lick his paw.
``AEEEIIII!'' He almost lost his footing with that one lick. Again, Psycho licked his foot, giggling crazily. Toes splayed out as the weasel kept licking, weakening the grip. How the rabbit kept on so long without falling was amazing. Even judge doom thought of lending a hand, but was thoroughly entertained with seeing him being tortured from the cab of the crane.
NYAHAHAHAHA! NOHOHOHOHOHO!'' He begged and pleaded, much to the cruel laughter of the gang who were also enjoying the show from the ground. All that was missing of the show was some popcorn and some chairs.
``You show em!'' One of them yelled to Psycho. He was on the floor, in hysterics, watching the rabbit trying desperately to hang on. Roger looked like he would crack in just a few seconds.
Down at ground level, Eddie hatched a plan to escape from the weasels and save roger from taking a nasty plunge. He was still looking up at the white rabbit being tickled, hearing the wailing laughter.
``NOHOHOHOHOH! STAHAHAHAP! I'm pblpblpblpblpblpblegging you!'' Rogers's footing was starting to really falter. Large feet slid halfway off the wire. Eddie's face was shiner, nervous that Roger might end up being erased like judge Doom predicted. The white rabbit slid almost all the way off, barely grabbing on with this toes, a very scary situation. Psycho was keeping up the licking, making things even hairier. ``Bwahahahahaha!''
``Don't worry, Roger! I'm comin' for ya!'' Eddie yelled hoping he could hang on long enough. He looked around; trying to spot red, clearly not working because the whole warehouse was made of red brick. Perhaps Jessica was up on the office, the yellow metal structure, and very grimy windows. There was nothing to save himself in the small radius of him and the weasel gang.
Meanwhile, Poor Roger was slowly starting to lose the grip on his toes, fatefully looking down at the barrels while still wailing in uncontrollable laughter, his vision, however, was obscured from the amount of tears streaming out of his eyes. Each time Psycho gave a lick that little bit of strength was lost.
``NOOOO! DOHOHOHN'T!'' More tears sizzled when they hot the dip. He thought he was finally going to end up slipping and falling. He kept re-grasping the wire with his toes, and Psycho was far from done lapping at his pink paws. He was doing everything he could to hang on and resist slipping. Psycho was obviously having a gaggle of fun licking, sneering madly while Roger was suffering much. Not a chance in hell he would make it out alive if that crazy weasel kept licking his paws.
``BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!'' The tongue ran across Roger's paws again, sending him once again into hysterics, only a few moments after Psycho had stopped licking. His toes twitched each time that the tongue ran across those vulnerable tootsies. He was very red at this point, exhausted from being tickled so much, and the weasel was far from done. There was not much that could be done to stop him from falling, other than stopping Doom or the weasels. The gang was distracted enough to not pay full attention to the big man they were holding at gunpoint. Judge Doom had enough and extended his arm out with that dastardly feather. To add to the bunny's misery, the hand slowly dragged the feather across the pink sole. ``AHAHAHAHAHAHAH!'' It was bad enough already with a nutty weasel licking his foot. Now he really felt like he was about to fall. ``IM ABOUT TO FAHAHAHALL!'' Roger cried out, one toe slipping, two toes slipping, now, hanging on by one paw. Both Judge Doom and Psycho took full advantage of it, tickling. Judge Doom was teasing his toes, while the weasel continued licking the rabbit sole. The rabbit reacted by flailing around his left paw - the one that was free. The toes twitched, despite being what he was hanging from.
``HEHEHEHEHEHEELP!'' He was wailing out hoping someone would help him, before he fell to his demise. I'm faaaaaalling!''
Finally getting very brave, Eddie swiped the gun away from the weasel gang, pointing it at them.
``What's the big idea, Valiant?'' The leader demanded, holding then hostage now. He had taken away the gun away form the leader, but it was still a two-on-one fight.
``I'm rescuing the rabbit, what's it look like, Wisenheimer?'' Valiant shot back, punching holes into the gang's car. He started to fire the animated Tommy gun spitting out bullets, amazed that they actually destroyed the car. In a flash, he gathered the gang, tying them up, and not having to deal with them anymore.
``Yipe!'' They luckily got out of the way before Eddie could punch them full of holes. Eddie lowered the gun, walking up to the car, examining it. He couldn't believe his eyes, looking at the gun. Turning it around, and taking another look.
He could still hear the poor rabbit crying out in the background, running toward the cab of the crane. Judge Doom had retracted his arm, and gotten out, not before swinging Psycho to the right with a wrong move of a level. Such a saving grace for Roger that he was free from the horrid tickling. He could finally catch his breath and jump up, using his weight. The rabbit was finally hanging from both paws, instead of just the toes.
``Such a very brave thing to do, Mr. Valiant. Living up to your surname.'' He got down, walking over, not intimidated by a Tommy gun pointed at him. A golden circular saw came out of his sleeve, whirring extremely loudly. ``But we can't have anyone messing up my plan to demolish Toontown, now can we?'' He thrusted the circular saw at Eddie a few times, rolling away. Eddie seemed to be cornered with a wide open warehouse to run to. He chose to run to the corner to a fairground organ.
``Jeepers!'' Roger's eyes popped out of his skull, looking at Doom's new hardware. He was swinging it without real direction and swinging toward the concrete.
``You know I think I should tell you about your brother. I know how he died.'' The judge said, walking toward him slowly, toward the organ. ``I dropped that piano!'' He burst out laughing.
``OH NO!'' Roger overheard the whole thing, ``He killed your brother?''
``Precisely! Your brother was going to talk, so I made sure he couldn't sing!'' He thrusted the saw, opening the organ in half.
Valiant was getting angry. Hearing that it was Doom who killed his brother and sent him deep into drinking. He tackled the judge, knocking him to the ground.
``I'll kill ya!'' He yelled, angrily shouting and running toward Doom, only to run into a crate as the judge jumped up and smashed into them. He was getting angrier and angrier as the man in black was evading him, catapulting on stilted cartoon legs.
Eddie then leapt toward where Roger was dangling over. Judge followed right behind him, with an anvil for a fist, smashing his way toward the barrels, tossing some boxes of buzzers out of the way. A few times Eddie rolled out of the way, just missing the saw. It smashed the floor, sending little and big chunks out in all directions. While the saw crazily slashed the floor, too, was the Tommy, gun. It was perfectly bifurcated. Doom walked slowly right next to the crate. An empty barrel was toppled and a large plank fell, creating a seesaw. And a crate of cartoony oversized hammers fell right next to him, but didn't hit him.
``I believe this is the end of the line for you, Mr. Valiant.'' Judge Doom, stepping over the seesaw like plank over the barrel. He took off his glasses, and sneering at Eddie, who was scrambling on the floor. ``It was nice knowing ya! You were a hell of a gumshoe, Eddie. Give your brother my regards.''
``No. This is the end of the line for you, gargoyle!'' Before the judge could split Eddie in twain, he grabbed a large hammer, swinging it down on the ends of the planks that created a seesaw over one of the empty barrels, sending the Judge man up into the air now as high as Roger was dangling. He accidentally sawed the wire, and Roger swung like Tarzan flattening on the brick wall on the other side of the warehouse. The judge's eyes popped out with an AOOGA horn. What goes up must come down. Doom face planted into the cement, flattening, causing a barrel to spin and spill. It tipped over, acetone and turpentine splashing over him. He started to scream as smoke was rising from the goop. He was melting, while screaming and shirking downward, falling to his knees.
``AHHHH! IM MELTING! AHHHH!'' His voice went into a wail of agony. Before they knew it, just his clothes remained, and that was the last of the dastardly Judge Doom.
Roger peeled himself off the wall, floating down like a piece of paper. He then inflated himself blowing on his thumb. All the limbs, fingers, toes, blew up, overinflating. Then he plopped his big ticklish paws onto solid ground for once.
``What happened?'' he walked over to the scene of Judge Doom's demise.
``He took a swim in the dip.'' He replied, walking with the footsteps splashing.
Jessica! My carrot cake!'' He cried, almost stepping into the dip himself; only save by Eddie, who was quick enough to catch him before it happened.
``Woah! Easy there, Roger! You okay?'' Eddie wiped off some dust from the rabbit, looking at the dip right at his feet.
``Thanks.'' The white rabbit replied, wiping a tear from his eye. ``That was a close one!''
``Let's go.'' They both went up to the office, climbing the yellow metal staircase up to the building on the second floor. Behind the glass and wood door, Eddie heard some muffled calls for help. Roger was shaking the door open, but it was locked.
``Stand back!'' He smashed the window, seeing the silhouette of a busty redhead inside the darkened room, bucking and trying to get out. She saw the shadow and was scared that it might've been someone on the wrong side.
``MMMFMHMFMHFMHF!'' She was tied to a chair and had a cloth over her mouth. Who knows how long was like this? ``What happened?'' She was oblivious to the whole situation. She was still tied up until Roger untied her and let her get on her feet finally.
``Carrot Cake!'' Roger hugged Jessica burying his face in her bosom. Eddie went up behind her, undoing the knot to let her get some air.
``I thought I lost you, Baby!'' She looked in his eyes, kissing his forehead.
``I thought I would never see you again, my carrot cake!'' Roger was elated to see her again, making sure they would never be separated like that again.
``Oh, thank goodness you're alright. I don't know what I'd do without you.'' She lowered her body, kissing her hero. Eddie, what happened to Judge Doom?'' She was curious to ask.
``Oh, let's just say the Judge took a dip in the dip.'' His eyes still had a face of being very spooked.
``Oh, my.'' She put her hand on her hand over her mouth. Jessica couldn't believe that Judge Doom was a toon himself. ``I cannot believe it!''
``It was horrible!'' Roger added. ``He went up in smoke like this whoooop!'' Roger imitated Doom melting, falling vertically.
``Yeah.'' Eddie grumbled. He was fighting the urge to not spare all the juicy details about what happened to the judge. ``Yeah, toons!'' He was reeling from seeing the Judge turn into sludge.
Sirens echoed outside, as the lights were visible outside the warehouse floor for the office cops finally showed up and came to asses the scene. A litany of shouting came from outside, as the police rushed in, guns drawn. Twelve came in, ten lowered their guns. Two had the weasel gang corralled.
``Alright, boys, let's take downtown!'' An officer barked walking up to the messy floor, feeling the turpentine and acetone waft sharply and painfully up his nostrils. He crouched, looking at the pile of clothes where the Judge used to be. The only thing the officer could deduce was that he was a toon himself, shaking his head, walking up toward Eddie, to ask him a few questions.
Another went up and handcuffed the whole gang of weasels who were still lying on the floor, shaking off the stars circling their heads. A few officers handcuffed them, yanking Greasy into the paddy wagon. They were all claiming innocence, not even for a second, fooling the cops.
``I was framed I tell ya!'' Greasy moved side to side,
``Tell it to the judge!'' One cop replied, clearly Irish, replied, slamming the door to the police car. He was growling while clutching the bars, as the others bounced around in the car.
``Shaddup!'' He slapped the others who were making a ruckus.
``Alright, you mind telling me what happened here?'' An officer walked up to Eddie who was right outside the office. He walked down the stairs.
``This bastard here was a toon all along. And he was trying to kidnap a gal of a client of mine. He killed my brother too.''
``A toon, you say?'' The officer looked puzzled, they didn't realize at what happened.
``Yeah, the guy was a toon trying to take the missus here, all for himself. The brute!'' He grumbled, patting last little beads of sweat with a white handkerchief, initials EV embroidered with red cursive stitching.
``Mr. Valiant, how can I ever thank you for saving me?'' Jessica got very close to Eddie, her hand on his chest, all in front of Roger. He didn't seem to mind at all, as long as he was safe with his loving wife again.
``Ah, don't mention it, Jessica. All in a day's work. Now let's get outta here. This place is giving me the willies.''
``You got that right!'' Roger hopped clapping his massive feet together, wrapping an arm around the tiny waist of his busty wife.
The three walked out of Acme Warehouse, where they found Benny back again, as they were hauling the weasels into the paddy wagon.
A thinner man stopped in front of Eddie, holding up his hand. For some reason, there was not really a good feeling about this. He was sure they wanted to pinch him.
``You mind coming downtown with us, Mr. Valiant?'' He wiggled his bristly mustache, speaking in low hushed tomes to the men taking pictures of the crime scene.
``What for? This was a setup! You know that!'' Eddie stated to get a little defensive. ``Toons.'' He grumbled, taking out a cigarette form a carton, sticking it in his mouth, lighting it and blowing smoke to the side.
``We just want to verify your story.'' The cop replied. He sighed, coming with them, climbing into the cop car. The siren wailed and off they went to the station. He hoped that it was enough to convince them that the Judge was crazy enough to kidnap Jessica Rabbit a singer at the local bar where she was singing at the same night he was there. What are the odds?
``Eddie! Where are you going?'' Roger ran the opposite direction, chasing the car, with no avail. He slowed down, coughing, choking on the vapors the car left behind.
``Hey, Benny!'' Roger cried out. ``You're back!'' The white rabbit opened the door for Jessica, who climbed in gingerly.
``How about a ride home, guys?'' Benny suggested. They looked at each other, shaking their heads in agreement. ``Alright, fasten your seat belt, folks!''
``Step on it.'' Benny peeled out, back to the humble abode of Mr. and Mrs. Roger Rabbit. That was enough excitement for one night or a few days. They shared a kiss, after being apart what felt like ages, wanting to go back to the (not so) quiet life of being toons.
The siren of the paddy wagon with the weasels inside, making a lot of noise, hooting and hollering wailed and the siren and lights slowly faded as it chugged along the lonely road to the big house. It sprung up and down as they were literally bouncing off the walls.
Greasy slumped back in the back of the police vehicle, Psycho was still laughing, moving his paws back and forth, sitting. He got mad, and grabbed the weasel by the straps, trying them back. Psycho didn't fight back, just moronically laughed.
``Hey, you dope!'' Greasy, one of the weasel gang grumbled in the back of the paddy wagon, handcuffed. He and the other three who were wearing suits were none too pleased that he was ``So you enjoy tickling do ya?'' He slapped the crazy weasel, sending his eyes rolling in his head. Psycho had to hold his head to keep them from rolling more. He and the other four were pulling him up by the ankles, standing on the seat so Psycho couldn't touch the floor. The rest of the weasel gang took turns scratching his soles, hearing him heartily laugh. This was not like the other laughs that he emitted. The others were crazy. This one was from a reaction from an unexpected tickling. ``You like it, do ya?'' He was jerking around in his straitjacket, giggling with his floppy tongue floundering about.
The weasel with a helicopter hat and brightly striped shirt got up, falling over as the paddy wagon took a sharp turn, with the whole crew tumbling. They all got up, lifting Psycho back up and then scratching the helpless soles, moving every which direction to avoid being tickled. Was not really useful, as they goofily giggled, dancing fingers on those exposed paws. Greasy stepped in, raking his clawed fingers across his feet. Poor Psycho was wriggling like a caterpillar,
``Hehehehe, this is fun, Greasy!'' One of them said, sticking a finger between the restrained weasel's toes, wiggling madly. He couldn't really talk, but if he could he would've been begging for mercy. Like Greasy and company cared what he said.
``Shut up, moron!'' He slapped the other. ``Let's teach him a little lesson he won't forget!'' he smiled, with the weasel dressed like a kid, got up on the seat, staring at those feet, licking his chops. With a very loud and sloppy slurp, he ran his tongue up Psycho's large paw. The crazy weasel clenched his eyes tightly, while tears were flowing, swinging from side to side, cackling as the others enjoying tormenting him. The two others in suits were scribbling their claws all over exposed brown soles, sneering.
Again, the car took a sharp turn, knocking them all to one side, with Greasy bashing his head against the edge of the long seat. Birds circled around his head. He grabbed Psycho's paws, wrapping his arm around his ankles, slowly tickling the spaces between the toes. Poor guy tried kicking, making things worse, making the claw dig deeper into the spaces between the toes, which Greasy was happy to make it far worse. He banged his head on the floor, not being able to take much more. He saw stars, sticking his tongue out while laughing goofily. While being held down, those poor tootsies got more licking, Psycho kept giggling stupidly, while he was still having tears flow out of his eyes, kicking and occasionally letting out little yelps. No way the gang would let that happen. Another weasel sat on top of him, while the car was still serving around the city. Greasy was totally satisfied with what he was doing, even himself falling into that temptation. He ran a finger across the sole, enjoying the sight of a paw jerking and trying to move out of the way each time it happened.
All the way to the station, the car bounced along, with raucous laughter and jeering as they tickled the lunatic weasel. It pulled up to the station downtown, with the siren dying down to a low wail.
A cop who came up and heard the commotion, opened the door, finding a bunch of weasels on the floor, ganged up on one weasel, who was laying in a puddle of tears.
Robostitch7
CoolPat7
