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3timer

Journals I can do...

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...everything else, not so much.

So any of you folks who've been watching me for awhile might remember a rant I went on about my aunt's cancer.  She's been fighting it with a brave smile these last 9 months even though the doctors made it fairly clear there wasn't any hope of remission.  They have been doing everything possible to extend what life she has, even so it appears that she has very little time.  She's in the hospital again, and by all indications it's likely to be for the last time.  Things will probably happen very quickly now and all they can do is make her as comfortable as possible.  

It kinda seems selfish to think about your own mortality when someone else's life is measured in hours, but, you know, that's what we do.  After some thought I made the decision to quit smoking for good since that's what got her where she is.  

So far, so good.  Haven't bought a pack in three days.  

I am using those electronic cigs though.  Let me tell you something:  They take the edge off, but they taste like shit.  They have a weird, sour, electric tang to them that sorta sits on your tongue for a second, that's the best I can describe it.  

I know it doesn't seem like much, but I guess I can honor her by quitting.  Better than waiting for the call that she's gone while smoking pack after pack.  

*EDIT*

My aunt passed away as of 6 pm US Eastern time this evening.  She's already missed.
Viewed: 41 times
Added: 5 years ago
 
Exelbirth
5 years ago
What brand are you using? My gf has one that you can refill with different flavors of liquid. She's currently got an apple pie flavored one.
3timer
5 years ago
I tried a bunch of the disposable ones because I didn't want to spend money on a kit and end up hating it.  Since some of the kits are upwards of 75 bucks.  So far the best disposables I've found were the Logic Black Label.  They have nice, thick vapor and enough flavor to cover the sour ozone taste that e-cigs have.  Blu are also not bad but the flavor is somewhat like chocolate instead of tobacco.  Njoys are terrible, easily the worst I have tried so far.  Weak vapor and very sour.  Metros are also very bad, but I think they are made by Njoy, so that explains it.  There was a new one at the gas station called Fin that I tried, but it wasn't so good either.  Basically any of them that "look and feel" like a real cigarette I haven't had much luck with.  Maybe the tech just isn't ready to make them that small yet.  

What I don't like about e-cigs is there is no warning when they are about to die.  They just suddenly stop working.  
Exelbirth
5 years ago
My gf didn't really like the disposable one she tried either, and it was one designed to imitate the looks of a cigarette. Even had a tip that glowed orange when you inhaled. She ended up switching to the refillable one, which cost her around 50 bucks. At least with that one all she needs to buy is the liquid refills. It also has a USB charger, so it's not likely to die on her. People do joke it looks more like a crack pipe than a cigarette though.
GeneralRedPanda
5 years ago
Coming from a former smoker, and someone who lost someone to cancer, the best thing you could have done for her is quit.
It will be tough, and you will always have the craving no matter how long you've quit.
I tried the electronic cigs, and they helped for a little bit, but I ended up going back to real cigs shortly after....I invested in a little hookah, and went with shisha, a flavored tobacco and the smoke is simply water vapor and it does enough for me.
If you want any more info, feel free to let me know.
As for your Aunt, you have my deepest sympathies, and I hope she is comfortable.
3timer
5 years ago
Thanks for your sympathy.  

After a long, hard struggle, she's gone now.  
GeneralRedPanda
5 years ago
It sucks that they leave the physical plane, but you still have joyful memories, and love to remember her by, and she's free from pain.
An old saying I heard sums it up pretty well. Grief is for the living, the deceased party.
BanusSilvermane
5 years ago
My sincere condolences. Losing someone is very hard, and I think it's wonderful you are honoring her memory by doing something as difficult as quitting smoking. I wish you strength through whatever ordeals may await you.
Koakai
5 years ago
Good on you for quitting smoking....

Honestly every member of my paternal family has been claimed by cancer in one form or another, so I know how much it sucks.
Just lost my dad on the second. Suddenly you realize there is a huge hole there. But it is also freedom from pain, as he was spending a lot of time doped to the gills to fight it, so you always have to think on the bright side.
3timer
4 years, 12 months ago
Sorry to hear about your father.  

That seems so empty to me, but I don't know anything better to say.  
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