I am reeeeeeally close to just finding the keys to my fathers gun cabinet and blowing my brains across the walls right now...
It's been about three hours of non-stop screaming, argument and raking me over the coals here.... basically my mother and father are fighting like cats over the fact that he will not listen or think anymore... and I'm getting pulled along for the fun...
I'm just so tired of all of it right now. I haven;t really had a nice moment of real pleasure in so long I've forgotten what it is... everyday is just repeated fights and screams and pain.
It's kind of funny but I really realized that I actually have no friends... not a single person I can turn to when things get like this... not anyone around me and most of the people online... well lately it feels like they just want me around for sexual favors... painting miniatures or... well hell half of them have just walked off it seems.
I'm very tired of it all right now... I have a razor sharp knife over my PC desk that really begging for a new sheath.
7 years, 4 months ago
12 Apr 2011 07:46 CEST