Well, I've been a part of this fandom going on 4-5 years now. I had a lot of fun and enjoyed all the good things that came about it.....
But lately, it just feels....empty.
I remember the good early days I used to have here. The friends I made, as well as the enemies. The fine art people drew of my outlandish characters. And all the things i have gone through.
But recently, after seeing how things are going as of late, with my constant need of funds just for upkeep, and the lack of anyone WANTING to commission me (either of their own free will or because someone asked them to), and as well, the lack of interest in any of my characters, be they old or new, I just don't feel happy here anymore.
I get on, prepare to draw what i can because of those who actually did commission me, and then I decide to browse the site, only to see a million things drawn about everyone else I follow, but not a single sliver of anything for me.
LOOK! I understand that "money makes the world go round!", but when you just don't have it, you JUST DON'T HAVE IT! I want just as much as everyone else to see their characters drawn by the likes of the higher-ups, but until work is considered a type of currency and isn't simply scoffed at just being a "clever excuse to get a freebie or a collab", I'll never have anyone of them draw me anything.
Lately, I just feel burned out. I don't feel appreciated except by a few. My art strives to improve,but it matters little, since hardly anyone wants to commission someone who doesn't have (And, for justified reasons, refuses to get) a paypal, or isn't as great as the top tier artists of the trade.
I just feel like I'm being overlooked (Inb4 "It's hard to overlook a 500ft tall ferret" jokes) and quite frankly, unappreciated.
I just don't feel like doing anything anymore, because I feel like there is no longer a purpose for me here. Hardly anyone wants my slow as molasses artwork, or wants to draw my interesting array of outlandish characters, or even me, as myself. I hardly contribute anything of notice these days anyways.
I feel like I should leave the fandom. I'm just not enjoying it as much as I used to anymore. I don't feel as included as everyone else I see, but then again, they have the money and fame to actually get further and further, while I have to attempt to ride the coattails of others just to get ANYTHING!
I'm not leaving yet (Maybe for hope something will improve for me), but maybe if things keep remaining the same, I think it best I make plans to do so.
5 years, 5 months ago
18 Apr 2013 05:57 CEST