Yeah, it's another one of those "then and now" deals. I'm still thinking about what I've typed about on my last journal. Nothing do worry for those that replied to it. It's not the fact that no one has replied to my journals or submissions. Even if there's none, I still appreciate the favs and views regardless. No, this is about everything all together. It's about my journals here and on Livejournal, my IMs that I now have on periodically through the day, the Xbox when I log on. It's the ones that I've connected with in the LAFF-list for the longest of times ever since the start of the fandom. Especially the ones that brought me into this fandom. They are the ones that I expect to hear something from by now.
I'm back...on my feet and everything and yet...nothing from them. No "HEY! You got a job now!" or "Been a long while, I'm happy that things are finally going through for you." Nothing...I hate that! And what?...Am I suppose to message them like a spazztastic kid demanding attention? As much as I want to cub-wise, I know better than to do that. It's a really tough reality (gut)check to endure mentally. I'm pretty sure if I hadn't been exiled from FA then none of this wouldn't have happened either. But then again, what would they care? Hell, the only furs that ever kept tabs on me from the get go now is
and Chanur (the one that helped me and Blaze find jobs) for that I'm majorly grateful. Everything's okay with me for the most part though. I've dealt with similar issues as much as I can count over the years. This will pass.
Overall, those that have been keeping tabs on me throughout the past couple of years I humbly thank you from the bottom of this feline's heart. Aside from my mate, you are the ones that has kept this cat moving forward. It'll be different starting the new year on a somewhat clean slate starting in March. And who knows? Maybe when Wesyl goes public I might have some old furs recognize me too. But like everything else, I'll just have to wait and see. Until that time comes I'm making sure that preparations are in full order.
I think it feels like I've just not had the opportunity to get to know you that much, if that makes sense? I know we met and hung out a bit at AC and all that stuff in 2011, but outside of that and the occasional interaction here and there you haven't really had your own computer or a solid presence with which to establish consistent ties with a lot of people, which can easily drift you apart from them.
I would probably be more supportive and stuff but I don't feel it's appropriate when I'm not like, in-the-know or extremely familiar with you or anything like that. This is probably a personality quirk more than anything else, honestly, and it's not like I'm uncomfortable around you or anything; I just... don't feel like it's my place, I guess? I won't presume that others feel the same way, but this is more or less the reason for my silence. I really am happy that you got a job, your own place and all that other stuff--it's a positive change that I'm certain has driven your life in a much better direction.
This might all be outside of the point you were trying to make, but I felt like saying something at least.
I think it feels like I've just not had the opportunity to get to know you that much, if that makes
It's cool Tweaker. Granted that's going to be taken care of shortly. But I totally understand where you're coming from. I normally don't message anyone random simply because I don't want to bother them constantly. I've had that happen to me a lot at the start of the fandom and mostly it's Insta-RPs left and right when I didn't have time to do such. So to me it's pretty much the fear of annoyance towards another.
Then again, this is mainly about the local furs that I've gotten to know since the beginning. Not the ones at a distance. Figuratively speaking, we all have our own lives to live and not expect much when we live far away state wise. But if we live within at least an hour or so drive away, one would think that there would be a strong bond that will last through the years. Boy was I wrong. :P
It's cool Tweaker. Granted that's going to be taken care of shortly. But I totally understand wher
