Thanks for all the support answers in the previous journal first of all. I'm not in the mood to talk, to answer back... to be honest I'm not in the mood to work or even to procastinate. I'm doing nothing these days even if I try again and again but... I feel like I lost my skill, my creativity... I can't think about what to draw, how to draw, when to draw... I'm frustrated rn. Frustrated, lonely and depressed as never I felt before.
Idk if I mentioned it here but I wanted to change the art direction of my content, like drawing more common things, reducing the fetishist and kinky stuff I usually draw to reach a bigger public and to try to get more support and more clients to get money, something I'll need now that my dad left forever. I don't really know how I can change this mood though. Even if I try, like drawing Pomni, or Ankha, or any anime character, or a Sonic character, or a Pokemon character... I can think nothing. If I try to keep going with previous sketches I have, I can't even trace properly and I end frustrated and I feel useless.
I know this is maybe too much text to read for most but I needed to vent, I needed to comunicate it with all of you.
I have to say, even if I will try to change the art direction, my usual art will keep going, just less amount so don't worry.
Anyways I surely need some help. I want to recover because I need to, my family needs it. But... I can't. I must get the driving license but I don't want to study rn and I don't have the money to pay for it. I want to draw but I feel I forgot how to. I want to make music but nothing comes to my mind. If I play, Inazuma Eleven Victory Road for example, the game I play the most lately... I end frustrated in minutes. And if I don't try, I feel useless and lazy. This last week I only watched The Amazing Digital Circus for the first time and like 7 or 8 reactions cause there's nothing more to me. I stay in home, listening music, doing the part of my dad, taking care of our car, and the rest is breathing and distracting my mind the best I can expecting my mom can get the monthly payment for my dad's death, luckily enough for us to live, also wishing for the sell of the apartement of my grandpa, something my dad was working on, that can give us around 60-70k and, at least we have no worries about our economy.
Well... that's what I had to say. I don't expect you can help me or something, I'm just a random guy and I don't have to beg for some help or for some money, you're all free to decide what you do. But I wanted to vent, I wanted to comunicate with all of you and telling you about my situation and the future of PsycoDraws as artist and Phrygian as a music producer, and of course how I feel and why there's no art.
Please, any suggestion you have, about art, about anything, feel free to tell me in the comments because I'm all blocked rn. I'll read all even if I don't answer back.
| Viewed: |
18 times |
| Added: |
2 months, 2 weeks ago
02 Feb 2026 02:35 CET
|
|
|
