i'm visiting family on the east coast, specifically at my aunt's place, where she lives alone in a mountain in the middle of nowhere. She's 77yo and it's isolating for her as you can imagine. There isn't much family left over here, only my cousin and her husband and kid (who's off in college most of the time). Said cousin also lives around an hour away. i do have another aunt on the other side of the family, but the sides aren't don't really interact, so she doesn't come to these holiday events, and besides is out of the country.
It's weird being over here. i have my laptop and tablet, tho it's not really practical to browse IB or draw porn while i'm in the living room. Travel is when i tend to work on writing, which is nice, but also hard to focus on it x3
When my grandmother was around the TV would be on (playing CNN) pretty much all of the time, mostly as something to keep as background noise for her. It's nice having it be quiet, but it's also _very_ quiet. It's weirdly tiring, and hard to maintain the energy for creative stuff, even when i'm in my own room.
There's a stasis to it. It's important for me to visit since my aunt is pretty lonely up here, but we also don't share many common interests. She tends to talk nonstop sometimes, and can go from political stuff to the toilet seats she wants to replace, with no segue whatsoever x3
It makes sense tho, since otherwise there would be no one else to talk to (other than her dog)...
But at the same time, most of what she talks about is complaining. Complaining about perceived wrongdoings by her housekeeper, how she doesn't like her replacement carpet, how a painting is hung unevenly, how her dog drools too much, how the food she gets from the store isn't as good as it used to be, how she hates cooking (but insists on doing it, and not letting me help), how she doesn't like a plant that she was given as a gift, generally how things aren't perfectly the way she wants them, etc etc. It's frustrating, but also she needs *something* to focus on...
It's very wasp-y. We drink a lot of wine x3
i'm not trying to complain myself, just wanted express the strange state of affairs. Including all the other deaths in the family (which i'm not going to elaborate on here), it's like living in a southern gothic novel~
i'm leaving comments off, since i know a lot of you will want to leave very well meaning comments, but that's not something i really need rn. i'm doing fine. Also, i know that many many of you have far more difficult and stranger family situations. i wish you the best with them~
Looking forward to being able to focus more on art, soon :3
Stay safe everyone, and remember to take care of yourselves <3
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2 weeks, 5 days ago
18 Dec 2025 22:56 CET
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