So last time I've given you all a real update on my situation here was when I lost my paypal. Since then I got myself an "actual job" and now I've lost said job... that's the TL;DR version ...
So context... My dad retired early when my mom got cancer, she died, and my dad's been out of a job since and I've low key been the primary breadwinner of the family since then with my dad on and off trying to find temp jobs to help out (he's been having trouble getting a more permanent job since the pandemic and all).
Ofc as you guys know I used to do commission, got my bank accounts and IDs banned from paypal, and then went to find a real job earning 20k php a month... when back in my peak commissions wise I used to do 30k php a month... but it was stable... but it was a 48hr work week... but I had benefits and worked from home.
Shit seemed good actually during that first year... until things started to look bleak for the company. We weren't getting as many clients/projects as we used to and thusly we were losing money keeping so many people employed so... we cut the dev team in half in a restructuring/downsizing... I was somehow spared from this.
To an extent shit was... kinda good but... not really. Since we had less clients I've been doing overall less work and getting "free time"... except it wasn't free time... I had maybe 2 hours or so worth of work to do that were spread out in that 10 hour time period. So I can't jsut leave and do stuff... believe me I tried and got angry calls for not responding fast enough... so I spent most of the day doing fuck all... and I know... I know I shouldn't even complain because getting paid to do nothing is literally teh fucking dream for everybody but fuck me I'm weak and all I get is a constant sense of anxiety knowing that yeah... when looking at my utilizaiton within the company it's practically nil sometimes... except for when we get busy suddenly with a big project but I digress...
So finally though my new supervisor was starting to notice and so here we are.
...so rn idk what to do with my life tbh
Actually tho... while yeah I'm probably getting back on the job search... I might actually open up commissions again
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1 month ago
02 Apr 2025 18:00 CEST
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