Is there any way I can get through typing this without coming off as super awkward or depressing? It's been what, almost 2 years since I last posted art, and about a year more for a couple people that I owe art to? I think at this point, the best approach is honesty and transparency, perhaps a little bit of bluntness that I've grown into over the past few years. I won't drag this out too long for clarity's sake.
Yes, I'm alive. If you follow me on twitter/X or you were in my Discord before I nuked it, you knew that already, and if you're a super close friend you knew that already, too. Some of you know what happened to me, both recent events and those that occurred at the beginning of 2022. Even though extremely bad people did extremely bad things to both me and my partner, things that these people should be rotting in prison for, I don't think it excuses me from my actions and being generally a distant asshole.
I'm sorry to all the people whose money I took and haven't given dick to show for it all this time. I'm sorry for not communicating literally anything that was going on after a point, especially when shit in my real life started to fall apart. I'm sorry that I stayed stagnant and basically let myself slowly wither. I felt that I had to put aside art and my aspirations, but in reality, I shouldn't have. I am a massive cunt. I feel genuinely terrible about not being around, and I'm sorry.
While I'm usually the most open person in the room, I don't want to talk about the specifics of what happened right now, particularly what was done to me. I'm just not mentally ready to tell a ton of people all at once yet, and I guarantee it would put a huge strain on things, so I'll refrain. I have a really good therapist, I moved across the country with my partner so that we can have an overall better life, I'm in a safe place and I have a support system in my loving boyfriend and his family, so just know that I'm not in any danger or anything anymore, and I'm healing.
Moving forward, I won't promise anything until I've re-earned my right to promise. I've learned my lesson. Now I get to make shit right for the people I owe. I have to learn to love and respect myself not just or me, but for the people around me, too.
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1 year, 3 months ago
04 Jan 2024 04:46 CET
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