where to begin, well i dont know if anyone has noticed, but over the course of a few years I feel my self slipping away from my drawing and I dont know for the life of me why,
i think it started 5 years ago when i was working at a little calling center who treated their employees like crap, every day working there it completely drained me mentally and physically and left me with not wanting to do anything but sleep or veg in front of the TV then when I got married and got pregnant it perked up a little more, then I had my son, which seemed to have sapped me from my creativity with drawing as well... those who keep track of my art record I'm sure you've noticed decline in my productivity, especially in drawing.
What I want to know is what happened? I used to snap out at LEAST three pictures a day and its starting to worry me in my lack, i'm afraid I'm gonna completely lose my motivation and my once good ability...but every time i sit down with a pencil in hand and sketchbook in my lap i cant think of anything to draw.... and I'm sure everyone is tired of seeing me draw serena and darkk or just boring pose pictures....it feels like thats all I'm good at anymore...and even then its questionable....
I think i've been burying my self in my yarn tail making possibly because i'm trying to prolong the possible inevitable...but I DONT WANT TO STOP DRAWING!!!! thats partly why I devised the plan of the burlesque ref, and its a great start, but the problem I'm having is that 5 years ago, I probably would have been done with it by now, and I've barely gotten half the sketch done.... =/ same goes for commissions that would give me something to draw and how to draw....and you'd think i'd have a fire lit under my tail for that sort of thing but i just find my self staring again, i just can't push my self to do anything at this time as much as I want to...I mean I could FORCE my self to do so, but i dont want people who paid me decent money to receive half-assed pieces of art...when I KNOW i can do better! I want to so badly start more on the goddess painting series i've been thinking about adding but i wanted to get through my other projects first....i have a bad habit of starting a project and never finishing it, and I dont want to be that person anymore ;_; i WANT to finish a project I started!!!! but my damn drawing muse decided to take a leave of absence with out consulting me and hasn't come back yet.....
i cant help but feel like my flame as an artist is on its last wick and it scares me....
so what I'm asking, is if ANYONE could maybe provide me with advice or ways to encourage the faltering flame to light back up with a passion so I can once again enjoy drawing....
I need help.....
6 years, 9 months ago
10 Feb 2012 09:36 CET