I am now 37 days into my new physical 'condition', so I figured an update was in order.
As of yet, my INR is still unstable though my A-Fib has all but disappeared. This is especially good as I can now physically feel and hear..... every..... single..... heartbeat...... so having to listen to it as it skipped and more or less made out like an old Atari game, was more than a little disconcerting. I still have a fair amount of swollen tissue and trauma, making yawning and especially sneezing excruciatingly painful. However, I've finally been able to sleep laying almost fully supine so that's a small blessing in itself, especially to my poor ass and tail bone that have had to almost singularly support whats left of my frame for the past month and some change.
Physically I've lost over 20 lbs, and only managed to regain 4 lbs at my last checkup. Considering that I don't weigh that much to start with, mixed with the blood thinner that makes me bleed at the drop of a hat, I feel like a water-balloon filled with tinker toys that might burst if I'm jostled too much. My arms have shrank to appalling size, and my German Eagle and Flag tattoo is starting to look like a titmouse with bruise behind it... My wounds are healing finally. The chest scar is completely closed, while my shoulder is lagging only a bit behind, followed by the drain holes in my stomach and finally my leg wound has even started to close in a steady fashion. All of which I'm sure has tripled my already staggering sex appeal to women.
Mentally, I'm worn rather thin. The past month has fled, and I only leave the house to see doctors every other week. I can't do much in the way of housework or even feeding myself, as even a soda feels like it weighs ten stone.... I pulled my bed covers up to try and make the bed and felt as if my arms and neck were going to detach and send me to the floor on my face. I can honestly say that this has been the most emasculating ordeal I have personally been through. If not for my wife, I doubt I would as far along in recovery as I am, yet I still feel rotten having to depend so heavily on her help.
As far as my returning to artwork, I'm still honestly up in the air. I have tried a few times to force myself to sit and work, but as I heal, I find I can't be in one position for more than a few moments before I have to get up or lay down. This journal alone took me over an hour to put together. For now, I can't make any guess for when I will return to active art duty, or be able to return to chats like I use to. For those I've discussed commissions with, as long as you don't mind a continued delay I've not asked for any payment yet, and I will still get to them as soon as I am able. It's simply too much work for myself at the moment to commute between my office, the computer, and my bedroom to try and gather material in which to work.
And for those who've sent me notes or art over these pages, I'm trying to get in touch with each one of you in turn! Know I appreciate all of the well wishes and prayers, and I will talk to each of you as soon as I am able.
| Viewed: |
10 times |
| Added: |
10 years, 10 months ago
06 Jan 2014 00:16 CET
|
|
|
