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i just realized, i don't do random chats..

The other day i was thinking about this whole streaming mess. Just turning it over in my head. Things like the reasons for it, how it came to be. Things like that. Well, in the middle of that thinking, I just realized (even though it's obvious now) that what I was doing in effect was having one of those random chat boxes open while I was drawing.  This is significant in my case because over my whole history of using the internet, one thing I almost NEVER do is pop into public chats. The only times I really have would be after livestream, and even then I rarely login to chat with people unless it's people I know or the chat seems friendly or interesting from the start.

Like ever since 1999 man! That's a long time! So this 'habit' or tendency I have of looking primarily for meaningful conversation had always been there and is a lasting trait. Having a chat box where any idiot can blah all over the place turns this upside down. The reason I tolerated so long is because people I know would join most of the time and everything would be cool and fun. But there's been that concern, always in the back of my mind as I'm drawing, that something stupid will happen or somebody will show up and say the dumbest shit in the universe that I can not stand at the moment. I'd usually have this constant tension when I stream because of it. And my time there became about the super power to ignore people's shit, an inane chat, or just get it the hell over with and leave.  That is no kind of environment to create art.

I have a friend or two that likes to talk about meaningful stuff. We'll end up talking 4+ hours sometimes. Debating things, discussing stuff that's fun or important, it's wonderful.  Heck, compared to the random chat where strangers can't even pay attention or give you the time of day, it feels almost like getting spoiled having these long conversations with friends ^^  It's really the sunshine in my life while I toil away alone up here in this desert like place.

So, blaming myself for getting angry at strangers dumbness and feeling bad that I can't put up with shit to the level that "everybody else does" ends here.  It's never had a place in my life lol. It was silly trying to force-fit such a thing because it's "the norm".  I'm just better off being myself as I always was meep meep :) *hides in his burrow and whips out his paint brushes*
Viewed: 60 times
Added: 5 years, 8 months ago
5 years, 8 months ago
*Hugs big bro* you explain yourself so well, sounds like you really feel better now, you're always better off being yourself. ^~^
5 years, 8 months ago
*huggles tight* Thanks mew ^.^ Yeah, I feel pretty good today. Like it's time to attack something rawr! :) It's amazing how many things can get in the way of just being true to yourself meep 0_0
5 years, 8 months ago
*head hugs* you is feelin better. good * snug snug*
5 years, 8 months ago
*hugs the skunky back and nuzzles him*
5 years, 8 months ago
I can totally understand where you're coming from with this.  Even if I myself am not one who draws much of anything, I still like doing roleplays on F-chat, and it completely destroys the mood when you're doing something interesting and a random douche just barges in with some inane chatter.  Even if you just block the guy, he's already left you feeling bitter.  Plus, other people can still respond to him and titillate that morbid curiosity of yours.  God, it's like a fucking splinter in the back of your mind, and all of their reactions just serve to poke at the injury!

But onto the matter at hand.

So, is there a way to do private livestreams, then?  You know, lock it down with a password and invite only one or two of your friends into the mix?  I mean, it's no Opencanvas, but it's better than nothing I guess.  
5 years, 8 months ago
Well, I just looked at all the options, but the only one available for free users is making every user require a livestream account before they can post messages in the chat. There is an option to password the channel itself, but it's only for paying customers...which I think is a very dick move on their part. Just for a basic service, they want to charge $45 a month, and that's laughable for the amount of streaming I actually do.

I'll just create a skype group or something where I can message all the people at once that want to watch me.

Oh, and yes, random douches and chaos are not things to keep company with while doing anything creative, that's for sure.  
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