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Games For Windows Live can go to hell.


You know what, developers? You make good games. Wait, no, no you don't. Most of the games produced nowadays are utter garbage, with either idiots conducting the quality control and beta testing or no such testing being done at all.

Games cost too fucking much. Some theorize this is due to the cost of producing certain games due to high consumer standards, but that's nonsense: most games fall short of consumer standards by a significant margin, and the consumer's standards are set by the industry itself. Many developers, much like the whining anti-piracy musicians, are actually rolling in cash.
Either way, whether or not it's deserved, video games cost far too much for what they bring.

But the final straw? Anti-piracy in itself.

I recently acquired Batman Arkham Asylum for an excellent price of $19. That was sweet. The game is fantastic, for the record. I'll come back to the game itself later. For now, here's a rundown of what went through my mind as I tried to start up this game:

Oh cool, this game looks awesome. Let's get started! Oh, it's tied into Games for Windows - LIVE. (GFWL). But that's not right... I didn't download this game. I bought it. I bought it from a store. With cash. So why does it require me to have an account for this... hang on, I've heard of this GFWL shit before...

Yes, Bioshock 2! Oh yes, I remember that. I can't play this other game I legitimately own, and bought via Steam anyway (now there's a clusterfuck for you!), because of GFWL. So these games are intrinsically tied into this worthless platform that I've never heard of before, and most certainly don't have an account. Why is it assuming I'd have an account?

Mmkay, no problem. I'll just point it to my LIVE account. Oh, wait, that doesn't work. Hm. Why not? Oh, I need to set it up for GFWL. How? Oh, it doesn't tell me. An hour of hunting around on the LIVE website later, it directs me to XBox LIVE.

Hold it, I don't have an XBox. Oh, well, whatever, I assume it's a cross-platform account, so I go about the process of "adding" the X-Box profile to my LIVE account. Easy, right? Err, no, it was not, because the Microsoft websites were full of redundant flash, time-outs, broken links, links to confusing pages, troubleshooting help that only covered the fucking console and not the PC...

Okay! It's sorted. Right, now I'll just click on the game and... okay, why can't it connect to the servers? Hrm. Okay, now it randomly CAN connect to the servers. Oh, it needs to update. Why isn't it telling me how big the update is? I have a small download limit! This is basic shit here, guys, don't just fucking assume I'm willing to download your bullshit.

The download crashed. Wut? Oh, let's just click on the GFWL shortcut here. Oh... it doesn't work. Some random error. Yes, my connection is fine, what's going on?

Alright, fuck it, I'll download it again. Right, click on this link here on the official Microsoft troubleshooting page... err, it's broken. And it took me to an X-Box website again anyway. So my profile is ready but nothing seems capable of reaching the LIVE servers.

Ten minutes later, I've found a workable download, but rather than a direct download that a download-manager could help with, Microsoft has opted for the extremely inconvenient and irritating "installer-downloader" program shit. Oh great, after 22MB, it's slowed to a crawl.

Cool, still not got GFWL to work, so let's see if I can Batman shit up without this TERRIBLE program that's a tenth as effective as Steam. Um, I can't save? What the fuck? No, yes I can, you can save the data on my hard-drive you cunts. Like was possible 20 years ago? Oh, I see, anti-piracy bullshit. Yeah fuck you, you've got two hours before I crack you like a walnut, game. Steam supports offline gaming, so what's your problem?! NOT EVERYONE HAS A PERMANENT SUPER-FAST CONNECTION TO THE INTERNET.

Oh, this is the final straw. Despite things like Steam and GFWL being about negating the need for CD keys, Batman AA and Bioshock 2 both require CD keys. So on top of all this bullshit, anti-piracy measures restricting when, where and what I can do with my game, locking me out of save-games whenever I have no internet connection (80% of the time), and giving more private data to fucking Microsoft... I better not lose the CD keys or else the whole thing is a waste of time.

You know what, Games for Windows LIVE? Go to hell. I've never had so much trouble playing a game I actually paid money for.

You know what else? This is the sort of thing that will encourage piracy. You're supposed to be using these programs to make gaming more convenient, not turning it into a clusterfuck.

Also: I own a PS3. It takes X-Box 360 (malfunctions a year) and rapes it in the HDMI port. Go. Fuck. Yourself.

Edit: the bullshit downloader for GFWL has crashed at 22.3 MB out of 28.4.
Viewed: 28 times
Added: 7 years, 10 months ago
7 years, 10 months ago
yes, GFWL is awful and i had a good LONG laugh when i found out that Relic dropped support for GFWL and went with steam with Darw of War 2: retribution.    DoW2 was on GFWL for the first two expansions, and i just made a random account to use it, not linked to anything else i use.    but GFWL was furious that relic dropped them in favor of Steam.

ive never had problems with steam to be honest, though i have a good connection to the net.    and you can get amazing deals on steam at times.
7 years, 10 months ago
I've never heard of GFWL until now. Thanks for the warning, and for making me all the more reluctant to touch anything new Microsoft will spew out in the future. The only reason I still use a Windows OS, is because (sadly) most games released these days are Windows-only. >:X
7 years, 10 months ago
Your pretty much summed it all up, Every little detail.
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