So, I was at work recently (yes, I'm employed, shut up), listening to a local radio station. My favorite actually, and not so much because of the music they play, which is your typical top-40 stuff, but rather because of the DJs and the outrageous crap they pull off.
However, this particular stunt of theirs, no more than a prank call, managed to piss me off. But I wasn't pissed off at the radio station or the DJs, no. Don't get me wrong though, I'm not a humourless prick. I did laugh at this. However, that doesn't make it any less bullshit.
A local boy had done very well at a sports carnival at his primary school, dominating several events. Someone arranged a prank call to his mother, where the DJs pretended to be officials from the Department of Education, and they actually told this mother that the school suspected her son had been taking a banned energy drink that accounted for his speed in the races.
Already this is ludicrous. The mother insisted that her son only ever drank water -- which is a bit draconian, but whatever. I mean, what's wrong with apple juice?
The DJs had created a ridiculous advert, apparently based on the Powerthirst "ads" from CollegeHumor (go look them up, they're bound to be on YouTube or CollegeHumor), and they played it for the mother.
It was utterly absurd, containing lines like: "Don't you wish you could run faster than you ever thought you could?!" and "But remember kids! Don't tell your parents, it's our little secret!"
The DJs tendered the notion that the boy was buying it on the way to school, possibly at local stores or petrol stations.
It was god damn absurd, but when we heard the mother's voice again -- remember this is only after hearing the advert -- she sounded distressed, saying "I had no idea!" and promised to confront her son about it.
You'd think her response would've been a chuckle and a "OK, which radio station is this?" but instead she seemed all too eager to believe that her son was essentially taking performance enhancing drugs (which is hilarious, because energy drinks are not counted as performance enhancing drugs).
This is what we're up against. Those of us trying to get morons off of kids backs. We're up against a generation of parents who aren't even aware of the facts I mentioned in the last entry, which are no different from Australia to America by the way, and they're convinced their children are an army of drug abusers, suicidal depressives and criminals. A ridiculous fake commercial reminiscent of fucking Powerthirst ads was enough to convince this woman that her son was a cheating drug abuser who was going behind her back and drinking things she didn't approve of. The trust she had for her son, who probably loves her to bits and trusts her with his life, was exposed as a sham. She was all too ready to believe that her son was practically taking speed.
The DJs offered no evidence. They simply claimed that the boy's speed was "abnormal." They played an advert containing a line inspired by sexual molesters and she accepted it far too easily.
Well, if nothing else, I can say one thing for you, lady: you better get used to him drinking things you don't approve of with a parenting attitude like that.
7 years, 8 months ago
22 Feb 2011 07:38 CET