When I went on vacation, I kind of felt I was in a rut. I barely drew anything at all over a period of two weeks. This may not seem like a lot of time to those that don't draw or don't make it a habit, but for me at least, that's a long time not to do any art.
Today I talked with a friend about...everything..for a long while. While we talked, I happened to look over my old art, things made around 2008-2010. This period is what I consider a very good period for my drawing. The usual balance of things changed, and I didn't feel like "I had to" OC in order to made art, or need anyone watching while I worked. Instead, I simply drew things every day for any reason. Angry? Make art. Sad? Make art. Hyper? Make art. Wondering about some little thing that bothers me, make art!
The best part about this whole things was, that no matter what I was getting comfortable with the act of drawing itself, over and over. I didn't *have* to feel okay to draw, I just had to feel something period and draw about it somehow. I was an emotional mess a lot back then and somehow I thought through drawing it, it would make sense after or it would at least "be out there" - and that was good.
Now I find that again, I'm imposing these "but it isn't a good time" or "i don't feel so great" reasons again. Even erasing the entire thing when I just don't draw an arm or a hand quite right. Even found myself wondering if I even knew what I was actually doing. These are all blocks to creating anything of course.
But one funny thing about doing art that confounds me, even though I 'know' about it is that it's the "doing" that usually helps you learn in the first place. And if that doesn't happen...well, "artist" just feels like a paper name tag ready to fall off, you know? Looking over all my old art helps though. The springiness and bounciness really makes the pictures fun to look at and imagine. I hope I can bring that back to my art again.