Welcome to Inkbunny...
Allowed ratings
To view member-only content, create an account. ( Hide )
FoxiePanda

Thoughts on John Carter

The movie hasn't been on for more than half-an-hour...and good god it's so fucking awkward. Bad dialogue, bad acting. This movie has it all! Jesus, Taylor Kitsch (John Carter) has one of the most annoying faces I've ever seen. Close to the beginning, he talked like Christian Bale in Batman, which is never EVER a good thing.  And some of this CG makes me really sad. I mean goddamn. I know it's "science fiction" and the movie takes place on Mars, but try and give some sort of realism. It's very obvious Disney had their fucking hands dipped in this piece of shit. "Let's be really fucking goofy guys. God forbid we ever try to do a serious fucking movie all the way through."

I will update this with more thoughts as this movie goes along. Maybe.

Edit #1: Cheesy fucking dialogue. It makes you roll your eyes. And damn he changed his mind really quickly for some girl he only knew for a minute. BUT DAMN. SHE FIGHTS GOOD SO HERP DERP. I MUST BE IN LOVE. THOUGH I'M STILL HARDCORE, SO I CAN'T SHOW MY TRUE FEELINGS.

Edit #2: Taylor Kitsch is a terrible fucking actor. That is all.

Edit #3: Okay, one awesome thing happened. This giant white ape thing ripped this bitch in half. Why? Cause she fucking deserved it. HOWEVER, this movie is still shit.

SPOILER ALERT: This movie sucks. The end.
Viewed: 63 times
Added: 6 years ago
 
KodaO
6 years ago
Didn't look too promising to being with  :P
mudpaws
6 years ago
i like the comic more but it's  fun to have  B movies :)
BeckTiger
6 years ago
Doncha always hate how it's that one lil thing that makes the hero fall for some chick?  It's like "Oh, she looked at me twice, that's my cue!"

*grumble*
KevinSnowpaw
6 years ago
I did not like it, yes it's true.

I did not like it how bout you?

Allso your avatar XD

"And you shall receive it....in, ABUNDANCE!"
Tae
Tae
6 years ago
That's Disney for ya =D
starling
6 years ago
Disney fucks everything up. Except Tron for some reason.
Gobby
6 years ago
Oh boy. They totally didn't fuck that up.
starling
6 years ago
The new animated series is pretty rad too.
Gobby
6 years ago
I've watched a couple of episodes, I think. The only thing that really bugged me is that the framerate seemed really low.
idgit
6 years ago
So what I gathered out of the foxie review is that it needs more penis? That about sum it up?
DOtter
6 years ago
That's Disney. They make animated drawings look convincingly like real people and real people look convincingly like animated drawings. The acting part for the green Martians must have been based on Jarjar Binks.
Teko
6 years ago
I really enjoyed it. Especially Woola.
wolfbuns
6 years ago
haha and i recently read a good review on the movie

never interested me tough, the trailers showed just exactly what youre saying here
Shokuji
6 years ago
" SPOILER ALERT: This movie sucks. The end.

Why'd you spoil it for me! D=
watermelon
6 years ago
Lmfao this is exactly what I was thinking when I watched that movie. I saw it when it came out in theaters. I don't remember a single thing about the movie, I just remember that it was really bad.
Popplewick
6 years ago
The books, are good. The movie, is bad.
New Comment:
Move reply box to top
Log in or create an account to comment.