Actually, I'm anything but.
I have a nephew. He's a terrible-twosy. The poor bastard has the distinctly bad luck of having my sister for a parent, and that's not good.
I've seen the kid smacked for less than good reasons, and my sister is a bit of a shouter. Now, nowhere near as bad as some parents I've seen elsewhere, who treat their kids like cattle, but she's definitely not the gentlest mummy dearest in the world.
After going through the shops and suffering through the obligatory "watch the kid on the playground" (because mummy so needed her f***ing coffee and fries...) irritation where I got suckered into playing mediator for some slightly older children, I'd seen the kid whacked and yelled at enough to piss me off.
Back at home, however, when I got put in charge of him again for a few minutes, I caught him playing with the power plugs, trying to lever them out with a piece of dead RAM (don't ask). I asked him to stop once, though I don't think he even understood me. When he tried it again, I gently took him aside, asked him to stop because if he got hurt or broke anything I'd be upset, and gave him a hug. He just said "okay."
So I then stepped back to watch.
For the next three hours he didn't go near the power plug. This isn't the first time I've literally got this toddler to listen to reason; something I considered to be impossible.
Thing is, nothing sticks at this age. So you'll have to repeat yourself a little, but hitting them is no more effective unless you cause enough serious pain for them to be terrified of you and the transgression (ever touched an iron as a kid?). They're brainless.
Later in the day, I watched the kid run from his own mother intent on whacking and yelling at him for some minor mistake he made. The thing is, this is exactly what she did to her dog.
That might seem like a non-sequitur, but it is. My sister was so brutal with her own dog that the creature was terrified of her and would run under someone legs to hide if she even looked at him crossly. Crossly meaning "about to smash her hand down on his spine painfully."
Guess who else she was like that with? Yeah, did I mention this is my older sister?
I don't know. This journal doesn't really have a big point to be made, I'm just musing on the matter. Just rambling before work. Particularly with toddlers, or extremely recalcitrant children, I can understand using physical punishment as a necessary last resort. But that's not what I'm seeing here.
What I'm seeing is just making me pissed off and very sad. This is the cycle of abuse, ladies and gentlemen.
Oh, I haven't mentioned that here, have I? Well, there you fucking go.
7 years, 9 months ago
16 Jun 2011 23:23 CEST