"Hey there, Miss Thang!"

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by YuriMatsue

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"Yeah, it's me.
Just stoppin' by to let you know I won't be needing your little dick services any longer.
Fellas, I wanna know if I can talk to ya for just a minute.
Now, there's a certain kind of fella I wanna talk to. I wanna talk to all these mutha fuckers who are walkin around here with these big, thick, fake ass, gold chains on; these beepers that dont work and have ever worked and no intentions on working; and no dick.

Now I ask, what are your plans? Are you gonna beat the 'pussy?' And if it ain't in, you're gonna call on your private phones? Wake up fellas, smell the coffee and realize that you are not the tea.
Wooooh!
But you know, I have a dream. I have a dream that one day these mutha fuckahs will get that jerry juice out their hair. I have a dream that I will not have to face no more scary curl. I have a dream that one day these mutha fuckahs will quit pullin and scratchin on these little bitty ass uncircumcised ass dicks.
Cuz, shit, fellas. If it aint grew by now, it aint gonna. That's why I'm lookin this evenin.
Woooooh, shit."
-Hateful Head Helen

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