Kali’s ABDL Beginners Guide
Hi there! My names Kali some people know me as a few other names, but that’s not important. Long story short I have been an ABDL for many years and one constant problem I have seen in this giant community is the lack of information. Yes there is information explaining what an ABDL is, but there is no guide to the tips and trick that basic ABDL’s should know. Thus my guide is born! I hope the information is helpful to whoever reads it!
The Lesser Known Communties
Ok so if there was one item I would recommend as a starter for an ABDL then that would be a pacifier. They are easy to obtain, maintain, and hide. Now if you’re starting out and cannot buy ABDL items online then a good substitute pacifier made for actual babies would be a MAM pacifier. A MAM pacifier was my first pacifier and I loved it. The nipple is much bigger than most pacifiers so it fits better in your mouth as well as the fact that they are built pretty well. You can usually get these at regular US stores such as Walmart or Walgreens. As for foreign country stores I am not quite sure if they are available. Though if you do have access to mail service then I would highly recommend an Awwsocute pacifier the nipple on their pacifier is very big and very squishy this to negate teeth ache that can sometimes occur with a normal baby pacifier. If you do get teeth ache from your pacifier then try taking a break from it for an extended period of time. It isn’t uncommon for teeth ache to occur with baby pacifiers.
Maintaining Your Pacifier
Now let’s get into some of the how to stuff with owning a pacifier. When you get a pacifier it’s important to keep it in good shape because you might not be able to get a new one for awhile here are some tips to maintaining your pacifier. Now you never want to use your pacifier after consuming a sugary substance it will degrade the rubber nipple much quicker therefore reducing its lifespan. As for cleaning a pacifier normally the best way to clean it is to boil the pacifier in hot water therefore eradicating all germs that have accumulated on it, but new ABDLs most likely don’t have access to this luxury. This is fine you can simply wash your pacifier in a sink or while you shower with soap and it will come out clean as a whistle. A couple things you don’t want to be aware of though. Water will accumulate in the nipple of the pacifier. To remedy this simply just squeeze the water out. Also washing your pacifier this way may make the nipple look slightly clouded this is fine it won’t hurt you in any way. As for a time of when to normally clean your pacifier every month or so should suffice.
Hiding Your Pacifier
Now this is one of the bigger reasons why I stress that you should start out with a pacifier as your first ABDL item. A pacifier is hands down the easiest thing to hide from roommates or parents or whoever you don’t want to know. Now you usually want to hide any ABDL you can in places someone would never go into such as a random pocket on a bag you don’t use, in a dresser under clothes you don’t use, or bin full of random stuff that you have lying around. A couple things you don’t want to do when hiding a pacifier is hide it near anything pointy that can rip the nipple of the pacifier and make sure the place you put it doesn’t stretch or overly twist the nipple of the pacifier. A pacifier is relatively tough depending on who it was made by. Another thing I would recommend only if you are very careful. A sure fired way to know your pacifier is safe and has no chance of being discovered is to have it on your person. Whether it be sitting in your bag or in a pocket or purse. I would only recommend this if you think you are aware enough to do this.
Bottle/Sippy Cup Tips
Now this and the bib were a close second for what your second ABDL item should be, but my reasoning behind why you should get a bottle second is because not many newborn ABDLs will want to put on a bib and look themselves in a mirror. Going onto a bottle is an easy baby step to being more comfortable in your ABDL space.
When you pick a baby bottle you want to go for the oldest month bottle you can get. Avoid infant classed bottles otherwise it will be too small for you. You could always try to enlarge the nipple hole, but I wouldn’t recommend it. If you can go with a NUK single bottle they are generally well made and great starters for newborn ABDLs, but there are other bottles you can acquire, but I typically like NUKs. You could also instead of a bottle get a sippy cup instead if you’re not feeling up to the idea of using a baby bottle.
Maintaining Your Bottle/Sippy Cup
Keepings your bottle or sippy cup in good shape isn’t much different from pacifier cleaning. The difference between cleaning your pacifier and cleaning your bottle is when you clean your bottle you have to wash it in a sink with soap and water then you can either clean it yourself or leave it out to dry. Now being a newborn ABDL you probably don’t want your family stubbing onto your secret. So I would suggest you dry your bottles and sippy cups. When you are cleaning your bottle don’t use any sort of hard wire or tough brush as you can scratch up the design if it is printed on the inside of the bottle. Go with a soft brush or use your hands. As far as I know the nipple part of a bottle doesn’t get cloudy like a pacifier because you can usually wipe it down, but if it does just give it a good cleaning again.
Hiding Your Bottle/Sippy Cup
In terms of hiding your bottles and sippy cups that’s a bit tricky. You can go ahead and use most of the advice in the hiding your pacifier section with this, but a few other places you can put a bottle is maybe under your bed if you can or behind furniture if possible. You could also hide it in a jacket pocket or in a tissue box in your room, but be careful with that one.
When most ABDLs start out they usually don’t want to jump right into babyish clothing whether it be a bib or a onesie, but if you are interested in either then I shall bestow upon you some lovely advice that will help keep your onesie or bib nice and neat! I know that most newborn ABDLs won’t have access to real ABDL built onesies, but a great substitute are regular adult onesies or kigurumi for some. If you do have access to mailing services. I would definitely recommend getting an ABDL onesie from onesiesdownunder. Its managed by an ABDL girl and her daddy. They make easily the best onesies in the community!
Maintaining Your Onesie or Bib
Keeping your bib or onesie clean can either be an easy task or a difficult one depending on the mess you spill on it. With bibs your typically cleaning food or drool stains off it (If you do that sort of thing). Onesies you typically are gonna have to clean from leaks from wettings. When you clean either of these the best thing to do is to hand wash them as its easier to control who sees and handles them.
Hiding Your Onesie or Bib
These items are probably among the easiest ABDL items to hide. Onesies and bibs you can hide in a pillow case you lay on, or in clothes if you fold or hang them properly, you can also hide them under a mattress. Just be sure to keep them away from sharp objects as it can tear the fabric.
Now this is the biggest thing in the ABDL community. Diapers are the single most popular item used as an ABDL whether you wear it for comfort or for actual use, we will be talking about both and much more in this little section. Expect it to be long. Now if you are a new ABDL then most likely you won’t have access to actual ABDL padding, but fear not you can get other padding that can still be of use to you. Though if you do have access to ABDL padding don’t worry I will list some ABDL padding I personally have heard people enjoy too.
-Non ABDL Diapers-
Huggies Goodnite sleep diapers are found quite commonly in any shop you visit. I have tried them myself extensively and would say you could get these for the feel of just having a diaper on your person. They are not meant for a full wetting and I would never suggest them as a main daytime or nighttime diaper, but they make great boosters or stuffers for when you’re wearing other stronger diapers. If you can’t seem to get your hands on booster pads Goodnites would be the next best thing
CVS Adjustable Briefs
If you had the chance to get these diapers get them. Though big and bulky CVS diapers are a great cheap diaper that can be used for daytime or nighttime, they hold pretty well when it comes to wetting and just all around are great. So if you find yourself at a CVS looking for padding, look for these!
Normally I wouldn’t say get depends because they tend to not hold up well with wettings, but I am told that these are widely more available in other countries than some of the other diapers I suggest so if you go with these diapers go for the maximum protection.
Now I know what you’re thinking these diapers are made for women. Well ignore that fact Always Discreet pull-ups are by far the comfiest diapers I have worn in my life. They may not hold much, but for such a light diaper they hold up well. I would mostly suggest these for light daytime diapers. If you make these your main diaper for daytime be sure to carry around a few extra.
Even though the only way you can get Abena diapers as I know are from ordering them online. If you want good non ABDL type diapers then go for a pack of Abena M4’s. They hold up well as nighttime and daytime diapers and priced decently well.
Abu diapers are by far some of my favorite ABDL diapers I have known. Granted I have never tried any of their products as with other ABDL diapers. I can assure you whether you buy an ABU Space, Lavender, Cushie, Little Pawz, or Preschool you get a guarantee from me that you are buying a quality diaper. ABU genuinely cares about their product which helps make their diaper great. As for nighttime and daytime diapers I would say ABU Lavender, Cushies, and Preschool are great daytime diapers. ABU Space and Little Pawz would be better suited for daytime use.
Bambino diapers have been around for quite some time, but they have aged well in addition to getting new diapers every now and then whether you go for a bambino Magnifico or a Bellissimo you will be satisfied either way. I also put Rearz on the end of this topic because I am myself confused on the fact if Rearz safari diapers are actually part of bambino. Rearz safaris if you can afford them are great and hold a LOT. They are among my top tier of absorbing diapers. As for nighttime and daytime, I would say you can use all of them as either because of how thick each of bambinos diapers are they are great for anything you do.
I’ve only known this company as of late, but I would like to say the few diapers they have made, are made decently well. The Dotty the Pony and the Super Boompa are great diapers. Would definitely recommend whether you want the girlie girl or super hero fanatic either one would be great. As it stands I would use Dotty the Pony diapers for day and use the Super Boompas for night.
Now I cannot remember who made their diaper first, but Crinklz and Rearz safari are generally the same diaper. They hold pretty well for wettings and have super cute designs. I personally like the designs on the Crinklz more than the Rearz Safari, but in my opinion that is based on your own personal opinion. So take my opinion of that with a grain of salt. Crinklz can be used as nighttime and daytime diapers.
This company was actually originally called Snuggies and when they first came out their first main diaper was the called the Snuggies Waddler. I personally loved the design and colors to death and I hope someday they will bring back a variant or the actual diaper back. The company had to change names sadly due to a branding issue with Huggies diapers; because of this the Waddler was lost to time. Now branded Tykeables their main diaper is called Tykeables overnight and I love them as much as the Waddler they came out shortly after the brand change and were made for late night heavy wetter’s. I would definitely recommend you add this diaper to your stash or collection if you can.
Also as a little note to everyone who reads this. I realize there are MANY great diapers out there, but I listed these ones off personally because I think these are great starters for a newborn ABDL.
Lotions, Oils, Powders, and More
When it comes to actually diapering up don’t just strap a diaper on yourself, why you ask? Well it’s simple. You won’t be as comfy as you could be using baby oils, powders, and lotions. So before you diaper up I would highly recommend you rub some lotion all over the bottom half of your body as it will help keep your lower half moisturized. Now even though baby oil does the same thing as well as smooth out your skin I would still recommend using both lotion and baby oil because it is a wonderful feeling using both not only do you smell like a baby, but you feel completely comfortable in your padding. Powder is essentially and I will a complete must when diapering baby powder is used as a diaper rash deterrent as well as a deodorant (It also absorbs a bit of moisture when wet, but no one advertises it as that.). There are various types of powder I personally enjoy ones with aloe, but you can use another type as well. Finally onto the cream, you can buy and use diaper rash cream as another way to defend against diaper as it is very common with diaper wearers. It’s not an essential item, but it doesn’t hurt to lather up in some just in case you might be out or unable to change for long periods of time.
Moving on to some more serious stuff now if you’re new ABDL and you have decent padding and you are very brave. You may attempt to go out in your padding. You need to make sure you have some specific items if you do so because you have no idea when you will be back at your fortress of babytude. You need to have extra diapers as well as other essentials (Reference My Changing List in the Changing topic for these essential items) otherwise you will not have a fun time. When I go out padded I make sure to have my changing items and put them in my backpack that I bring everywhere. Now you can substitute my backpack for a purse or actual changing bag or anything else, but unless your friends or family is fine with your diapered butt I recommend you keep your padding incognito. Now with padding comes crinkling all padding crinkles especially plastic backed. Now there are ways to remedy this. You can buy clothe backed diaper which almost eliminate crinkle noise all together or you can do a less expensive option which is where some underwear over your diapers. Your underwear can help muffle the crinkle noise you make until you actually use your padding. It’s a great little trick for new ABDLs and unaware friends. One other way to help keep yourself silent is to change padding types. There are two types of padding plastic and clothe backed. Plastic creates more noise while clothe back is the silent savior. So when you are picking your daytime or party padding go with clothe backed. Now another issue you need to be aware of is the fluff of the diaper sticking out of your pants wearing a jacket and making sure your shirt stays below your waist is very important to keeping your padding hidden. The jacket is more of an extra item that I found helps relieve the stress that someone is going to see you diaper sticking out of your pants. Wearing a shirt that goes below the waist is a must otherwise everyone is going to know you’re padded whether you want them to or not. Keep that diaper fluff hidden!
Changing one’s self is no easy task (Believe me I know), but if you follow this guy I am sure I can make it much easier on you. Now whether you are changing outside your personal home or not is a big difference. You need to make sure you have the Changing List as I like to call it.
-The Changing List-
• Extra 2-3 Diapers
• Changing Pad
• Baby Oil and or Lotion
• Baby Powder
• Baby Wipes
A typical ABDL will have tape diapers, but if you have pull-up type diaper instead then you shouldn’t have to much trouble. Another great tip unfortunately not all diapers have this wonderful feature, but some adult diapers or baby diapers if you can fit in them have a wetness indicator. My diapers that I wear have to yellow lines on the front that turn green when wait. Its extremely useful and I would definitely check to see if your preferred diaper brand has it. If not there are special devices you can buy that can alert you, but they are much noisier than a simple color change or picture disappearing.
In terms of when you should change typically depends (Ha diaper pun) up to you, but my personally recommendation would be to change when you know your diaper can’t hold no more. The only exceptions are when you are about to go to sleep always change before bed or when you know you won’t have another change for a long period of time. Diaper management is a very important task and can be difficult at times especially for newborn ABDLs.
Leaking is the Bain of pretty much every ABDL’s existence. Now let’s get this straight. No matter how hard you try it will happen, you will leak out of your diaper. Now whether you want to ruin your favorite chair or mattress or car seat or whatever you happen to have your tushy on is up to you, but I am hoping to help you at least save whatever you want to keep clean. For leaks there are a few different ways to help stop them from getting worse. One option is to get a diaper (If possible) that can hold a bigger wetting usually it tells you how many liters a diaper can hold on the packaging. If not look it up on the internet most likely someone has posted a review and or statistic of the diaper you are trying to purchase. Second option is getting a plastic or rubber diaper cover. A diaper covers purpose is not only to make you look super cute (Unless your diaper is already adorable) and to prevent leaks. It is meant to be that extra barrier to help hold the extra wetting whilst you find a quick solution to your problem. A third option you can choose and less expensive one than buying stronger diapers is buying booster pads for the diapers you already have. Booster pads are extra thin layers of padding that slip in your regular diaper. They help take the extra flow when your regular diaper can’t. A fourth option and a much more expensive one at that is you can wear more than one layer of padding. It is possible to wear two diapers at once and many more at that. I once knew someone who wore 65 layers of diapers (I know crazy right?), but in order to do such a thing you need to know the right way to do this. It is really simple. First you need your two diapers and a part of scissors I would not recommend a knife unless it is a decently sharp knife. You need to take the inner diaper and cut a small slit typically in the middle or a little farther near that of the diaper. The purpose of this is to allow all the extra fluid that leaks out of the first diaper to go into the second diaper which you layer over yourself. Now you can repeat this process as much as you want just be careful and try to keep the inside substance of the away from the more sensitive parts of your body. Sometimes they are not human friendly. You can also combine this diaper layer technique and add in booster pads to the mix, but not many do it.
Disposing of Diapers
Of course you all should know this, but when you use your diapers, you have to throw them away. It’s very unsanitary to keep dirty diapers lying around. I know a few tricks that can help newborn ABDLs out in a pinch until they can properly throw their diapers away. First of all when you take off your wet diaper put it in a plastic bag typically from a supermarket this is going to help contain the smell a bit easier unless you have a diaper genie or proper diaper disposal bag. Next you can spray your diaper bag or diaper with a body spray or cologne this will help conceal any smell that might arise. Now of course people might be suspicious of your one random bag down in the bottom of your trashcan a neat little trick is to try and surround the bag with trash it will help camouflage it on the inside and outside from prying eyes. The end goal of all this is to eventually throw your diapers out in the main garbage bin or community dumpster this depending if you live in a house or apartment.
The Lesser Known Communities
In this topic I will be touching on some of the hidden mini groups that I have come across and talked to personally. I am doing this because people who are apart of these mini communities are groups express their disdain for how they are treated or how someone offended them unintentionally due to lack of knowledge. Pay attention closely these few tips could help you make a new friend or two.
Now you may know many ABDLs choose to wear their diapers for specific reasons more or less for comfort or security. Now a person who is medically UI or urinary incontinent is someone who has lost all function of their bladder, usually not by choice. A person who has lost control via excessive diaper usage is called diaper dependent. When you meet someone who is medically UI they may not even be an ABDL. Many people who have the choice in wearing padding or not may just talk with or exist within the community because they find more people to relate to in the ABDL community. Though typically you will find diaper dependent UIs only to exist as ABDLs. When you come across someone who is medically UI remember be respectful and be polite. Don’t typically question them on how them became UI or ask anything related to the subject. Some can be offended by this as maybe the reason they are UI is the result of a tragic past. Let them tell it to you or if they say it is fine to ask then go ahead, but remain respectful to their feelings at the same time, but at the same time don’t treat them like some broken person. They are just like you! Now that you know this go ahead and maybe make a new friend!