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Elizabeth
Last in pool
This is a very emotional picture for me.
As you know, Elizabeth is a character of mine. She exists and does her own thing, cake and all that.
However, she is also a representation of me.
While I don't know how to adequately explain my life in words...
my art takes care of it wonderfully.
That is what this piece is.
This is a manifestation of my sorrow, pain, and hatred for an incident that happened in my life.
Explanation
Around the age of 3 or so my "mother" apparently couldn't handle having me. I don't know the cause for it at all. Until I was 7 my parents have been the wonderful parents that have taken care of me to this day. I had no idea of the events that took place but a ball was dropped in my life. My "mother" told me who she was. I actually have two sisters, who I love very much. The main issue with this is why she kept my sisters but tossed me aside. I don't understand why. Was something wrong with me? Did I do something wrong? I DON'T KNOW!! I rarely get to see my sisters. Sometimes I feel like I am the worst big brother ever. I'm not there for them, I can't protect them, I can't do anything for them. It KILLS me inside sometimes knowing that. Some days I go to bed and my mind starts to wander to thoughts I don't need to think about. Every question I typed in yellow is a thought I have had.Those thoughts cause me to feel so much pain, sorrow, and hatred. I usually cry myself to sleep because of it.

At this moment, I can't stand my "mother". She didn't want me, that's fine. Whatever. I'm better off without her anyway. I do my best to avoid her if I can. I still love my sisters though.

Keywords
female 512,266, dog 82,978, f 10,609, crying 5,328, pain 3,132, sorrow 221, negix77 82, hatred 56, anguish 19, elizabeth the dog 9
Details
Type: Picture/Pinup
Published: 5 years, 3 months ago
Rating: General

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BlueChika
5 years, 3 months ago
You did a wonderful job on the picture. Love the pose and expression you chose to describe the feelings your character is feeling.
Now about what happened to you in the past, that was very wrong of your mother to do. Even if the reason she did it for was to protect you, she still did wrong doing what she did.

Good thing you still love your sisters though, that shows the big heart you have <333

Once again, awesome job with this picture ;D
NegiCake
5 years, 3 months ago
I know right? I LOVE how this came out so much! I'm really proud of myself. ^^
I do my best to cope with tragic events in my life. Some days I'm really good about it. Other days...not so much.
My compassion is something one could see as a strength and a weakness. Me? I fully enjoy caring for others.
It makes life so much easier to go through. I try to bring joy to others as best I can. ^^
specterHSC
5 years, 3 months ago
*pats on the back.*

Id like to say more but this hits closer to home then id care to admit. Its good to see you have a positive out look on things. Maybe we can talk about it in the future it the timing feels right. Take care sir.
NegiCake
5 years, 3 months ago
It really hurts when I think about it. I do my best to just push it aside though.
I just try to make the best out of life that I can. I wouldn't mind talking about it more later on.
However, at the moment I feel I have said everything I needed to. If at any point you want to talk just let me know.
specterHSC
5 years, 3 months ago
sounds like a plan sir.
MightyDarker
5 years, 3 months ago
...A traggic story... I just can't believe a "mother" could do such a thing to someone like you...

...anyway.. you have my strengh and valor to avoid any trouble.. if you need something... just come and talk to me.. I'll see what I ca do to help you...
NegiCake
5 years, 3 months ago
As upsetting as it is, I'm going to be okay.
This picture actually served it's purpose in allowing me to get everything off my chest.
I finally feel better. Sort of at peace if you will.
Sure I still have some built up emotions left but they aren't bothering me as much now.
CyberT
5 years, 3 months ago
Oh man. Everyone has their stories.

The good news now is that you've made it. And you are here.
NegiCake
5 years, 3 months ago
Yeah. I have a lot of people in my life who have helped me get over a lot of tragic things that have happened to me over the years. I am so thankful for everyone who has helped me so far, and to those who may help me in the future.
PervyNerd84
5 years, 3 months ago
You're not a failure as a big brother; your Mother did you a dissevice and it's just not fair. If you can't accept one child, then why have more? To me such rationale never made sense.

You truck on Negi and know you're a good person.
CBringer67
5 years, 3 months ago
Mmph. Sorry you are going / have gone through shit like this... I've had a lot of traumatizing trouble throughout my life (caused almost entirely by my previous stepmother), so I can definitely relate. The head-clutching anxiety, stress, depression... All the negative thoughts and questions whirling around your mind like a tornado, awful memories that never seem to stop bringing the past back to the forefront of your thoughts... This picture greatly embodies the physical reaction of when it all just becomes too much to keep inside - when your body forces a release, just to give it some temporary relief from the havoc these emotions wreak.
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