"We've intercepted transmissions associated with the recent rash of UFO sightings," the officer stated.
"So, what on Earth is E.T. talking about?" the commander asked sarcastically as a reply.
"What doesn't make any sense is that they use our standards and language. This first one I have seems to be simple observations." the officer replied
[The majority of the Northwest continent is covered by only three nations. Perhaps the most influential on a global scale, although not on a conifer scale, is Betuland.]
"Are they mocking our naming conventions?" the commander asked.
"Maybe these space aliens don't hold the same ingrained appreciation of trees as we do," the officer explained.
[It encompasses the midsection, although most of the cities of this country are concentrated on either coast. In terms of population, the largest of them is New Cork City, a metropolis so massive it is divided into five boughs. Manzattan contains the central business district, and was the portion that annexed the other four. To its North is the area known as The Barx. Directly to its South is Bractlyn, which geographically speaking is part of Fishtail Island.]
"This obsession with New Cork City has me worried in light of recent events." the commander said.
"Do you think they might try to attack a city already targeted by terrestrial terrorists?" The officer asked in a worried tone.
"Either that or send a giant ship to obliterate Los Angios." the commander stated.
"You really think they'd pull invasion tactics straight out of a movie?" the officer inquired.
"Anything else in this transmission that would imply targets?" the commander asked.
"There is some more remarks of these outsiders mocking our naming conventions, but one part does mention the Elmpire State Building. There is also this next part." The officer explained.
[A massive feminine figure stands at the entrance to the city, symbolizing the ideals of the country. Her skin was wrought from plates of copper and her bones are made of iron. Some also see her as symbolizing an emancipated woman who was once a slave.]
"Oddly specific, but why on Earth would they know this?" the commander asked.
"Remember how I questioned why they would transmit in a coding identical to the one used here on Earth?" the officer asked rhetorically.
"Do you think they wanted us to intercept and understand their observations?" the commander asked.
"The fact that they changed frequency part of the way through to one we didn't pick up makes that seem unlikely. I think they are in fact terrestrials." the officer explained.
"So you think these flying saucers are really just ordinary people masquerading as spacemen?"
the commander asked.
"Hold on, they are back on our band. I'm picking up more." the officer proclaimed.
["With the march forward in technology, it is inevitable that the artificial intelligence will exceed the minds of the creatures who created it. If we are to survive in this new era, we must begin the process of merging the natural with the artificial. We must lead the way in the adoption of cybernetic technology. We must guide the other nations of the world in doing so."]
"That does it." the commander said. "I know who is sending these messages. That speech sounds EXACTLY like something the leader of those mole people would say."
"They must think their technology is so advanced they can get away with pretending to be extraterrestrials when they are really subterrestrials." the officer said.
"The way you say that makes it sound demeaning. Like you think of them as lesser than other forms of intelligent life native to our world," the commander reprimanded.
"Right. Sorry. We should value the rights of all Terrans, as that is the ideal upon which our nation was founded." the officer concluded.
For reasons of national security, all distinguishing information, such as name, location, and species of those involved were left ambiguous in this account.