(aka so many things that pissed me off the last two weeks)
Oh boy, it's not been a good one. So where do I start?
Hey it's that old group issue again. Especially with voice chat. Why do I keep burning myself? Is it that I still have hope that just maybe, they aren't lying and it's just me? Probably but I swear every experience goes like this:
Half-hearted 'yeahs'
Silence
Plainly ignored
lied to about not ignoring anyone
Vitriol
Like Zoner getting on my case just because I said I 'seen' a trailer and been getting on my case ever since. What the fuck did I do to him?
I have to repeat myself, I don't point out I'm being ignored because I want to be the centre of attention. Have you seen me carry a conversation? It's awkward as shit. No thanks, I'm good. But that's just plain fucking rude and passive aggressive. I ask the people on the groups I'm with:
What have I done?
Did I insult you in some way?
Did I annoy you with what I speak about?
Am I just that uninteresting?
Just fucking tell me dammit!
Then we have, surprise surprise, Even MORE classic sonic fans trying to tell me that their opinions are 100% fact and call me a kid in the process. I shit you not. These people are cancerous I swear.
And then you have the trip to Normandy. Yeah I love standing out in the cold for an hour, sometimes pointlessly. The trip wasn't awful; Normandy has some fucking beautiful scenery and the French know how to make a damn good pastry, but everything else wore out its welcome.
I was surrounded with class members I don't know and some of them.... I refer to the previous points about the group above, only with added patronising.
My sketches were poor and it didn't help I was with someone in the dorm I was in which hindered what I could draw.
And when everyone, yes everyone cause they wouldn't shut up about it (tbf nor did I), was sick of it (they all got drunk the night before too), the lecturers tell us no bed except for us. So from 11 french time to 6 gmt, 8 hours of barely any sleep, then a 4 hour coach ride. I'm eagerly awaiting to get home, my mood really damn low. I get home and then my little brother happened.
It's been such a shit fucking few weeks. I need to vent somewhere cause I feel like I can't do it anywhere else.
P.S: I can't stand messages like "Well you just need to talk with people about what you like/you just need to stick with them/just find people and talk with them and you'll be friends in no time", or "Oh you'll get there one day, you'll reach that drawing level. Like I did." Oh You did? Well good for you but here's a dose of reality.
It doesn't work for everyone!
I'm so sick and tired of people telling me or seeing random 'encouraging' tumblr posts. Talk about what I like? Be confident? They don't give me the time of fucking day! Confidence? Sure, it's really easy to believe in oneself.... Maybe for you but not everyone is you. Why don't you have social anxiety and awkwardness for a day and then try and complain that I'm too negative, Group chats
Oh you got to that drawing level easily? Well good for you but again, doesn't apply to everyone. So quit with your little annoying 'motivational' comics that pop up all the damn time and face reality.
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7 years, 1 month ago
23 Mar 2017 23:09 CET
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