I've been being called by bill collectors all day every day for over half a year now. I live every few days in terror that my wife will run out of medication. As of last month we have no car insurance which was the last kind of insurance we had. And now with our car payment behind again as of tomorrow, I'm starting to sink into that hopeless place of feeling like I'm never going to get out of this hole.
I just feel like curling up and giving up some days. People have been so helpful so far, but I know I've run out people's ability to give charity. And I see no other way out...
I'm starting to understand what drives some people to suicide. Not saying I'm suicidal, as I'm not, but I am starting to understand. Waking up every day with the knowledge that the chances of it getting better are literally smaller with each passing day, knowing that if you by some miracle get a job your pain will be immense and you'll likely be fired for it eventually, watching the person you love more than anything else in the world suffer and knowing she'd be even worse off if you DO go away from the home to work, but not seeing any other way...
I wanted my gaming and art to take off as a way of making money but it isn't happening. I wanted my Patreon to help but other than letting me be certain that on the second of the month I can get my wife four days of medication, it isn't. I see people earning literally $20,000 a month on that site doing nothing more than furry flash sex games, and I can't even break a hundred a month for art and writing I pour my soul into.
Yeah. I understand people who are suicidal now. I understand the way that emotional pain and desperation can build up to the point that you just want it to stop. I understand how you can just want it to be over so badly that any fear of what might come next is negated by the thought that at least if it's hell it will be a DIFFERENT hell.
I'm not giving up. But I understand those that do, now.
I have heard some pastors say that someone who commits suicide goes straight to Hell. I am not not trying to make a judgement call on that issue...It is what I had heard some pastors say.
I have heard some pastors say that someone who commits suicide goes straight to Hell. I am not not t
Yeah, I've heard that too. My aunt committed suicide at 61, a decade ago. I'm not saying I'm going to any time soon. I'm just saying with the level of desperation I'm experiencing right now, I understand people that do.
Yeah, I've heard that too. My aunt committed suicide at 61, a decade ago. I'm not saying I'm going t
