*sigh* I am writing this not for drama, nor for attention. But to help awareness and to help myself. So please. bare with me. Also, there may be some triggers in this journal. As it will deal with child abuse both physical, and sexual.
Earlier today, I read something on a social media community. And what I read, sickened me. First, it was of a person that had molested a child. That in itself is a heinous crime. But to compound that, was a friend of this person, defending this person. Saying that because the child was asleep, the child wouldn't be harmed. and the child Seems ok now.
I will admit, that triggered me bad. And I responded, granted with emotion, but also in hope to show this person that yes, damage will most likely have been done. Instead, for my efforts, what I had been through was.....downplayed to nothing.
Again, this person is defending thier friend. This person's friend Moslest a Child while the child "slept" And that person said they would do it again if they thought they wouldn't get caught.
So...here is where a bit of education comes in.
My father began to sexually abuse me about the time i was turning 3 or so. a lot of it did happen while he thought i was sleeping. Or if he knew he didn't care. As I grew older, he grew bolder and did...other things. unspeakable things. I will not get into detail. It was bad.
From that came nightmares, nightterrors, fear of certain things, and for a long time? Fear of the penis. I blamed myself for most of my life. I walked away from all of that with a lot of baggage.
Later, when I was growing up in group homes, there were other kids there that went through simalar, and like me, dealt with emotional problems, night terrors and so on.
And this ...."Friend" has the nerve to say that the child was asleep so the child won't be damaged?
um. No. Unfortunately the damage has been done. As the child grows older, there will be trust issues, and fears, and phobias and a lot more.
Im 40 and and I Still deal with these things.
I'm not sure what else to say right now. Except that for those that have been through what I have? you're not alone. There are people that can help you. It's Not Your Fault!
You do not have to carry this baggage. There are people you can talk to, to start the healing process. You do not have to be a victim.
Here are some links that may help you if you need it.