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Which Path Should I Take? / Fighting Against Myself

Ever get those odd thoughts running trough your head on what to do next in your life? Unfortunately I've been getting these thoughts constantly throughout the days I've been at my sister's.  Basically it's all about finding the drive for me to do these things, but it seems like all the parts of my mind are conflicting with one another with the goals and options that I have.  Mainly the teams of Creative Ideas and Optimism vs. Logic and Doubt.

My basic goal is to actually land a job so that I can save up to be back on my feet and continue to help out my mate and my friends.  Plus at the same time save up in order to be financially sound once again.  That doesn't have any conflicts what so ever.  But the time in order for that to happen is taking a bit too long.  But even after landing a secure job, what talent should I use or start learning in order to make myself excel in either RL, the fandom or both?

3D Art/Rendering - This was the very first main thing I had in my mind when I was growing up in North Chicago.  I was introduced to a program called Bryce 5.  I've made some basic 3D renderings, tested out camera and object movement way back when.  Now that there are even more 3D programs out there, it basically made my Bryce obsolete.

Creative Ideas: I can start to learn how to render actual people, then furries, and by then I can render Sonic type models.  The reason why I said "type" is that I want to follow a cool artist known as Twilight.  He does some really cool 3D art and movies and a spectacular job in his projects that aren't Sonic related.  Unfortunately he stopped doing Sonic style work altogether.  So I want to follow up in his footsteps.  Regardless of the strain and effort to create models and movement in which it takes a lot of time, the end result will be worth it.

Logic: In order to excel in this endeavor I would of course go back into college.  But with what money?  Sure I can ask financial aid to get me back in even though I still owe them a grand or two (No thanks to Columbia).  And even after all of that I would still need a job in order to continue to keep going to see my friends, eat, etc.  Not to mention I'll most likely need provide myself with the proper computer and software in order to make awesome renderings.

Music - I love music.  At first I was a little scared when I was a kid because I didn't want to make myself look stupid if I sing.  When I was introduced to video games, I enjoyed the sounds as I was playing the game.  Afterward, I've started to play random songs on my keyboard by ear guessing the notes of course. Later on growing up in N. Chicago, I was in a band in which it was one of the rare things that kept me from breaking mentally.

Creative Ideas:  I've already made some interesting mash-ups and funny ideas.  That and I have made a couple of DJ tracks.  I've also made a couple of my own self made songs just waiting to be improved.  But they're mostly like stage music you hear from Megaman X or Sonic.  If I start making more of these random songs, then I might get some type of recognition.

Logic:  Barely anyone listens to the music at all.  Eventually when I get better I have more of a chance, but being an awesome musician still doesn't put much on the plate.  If I were to make something out of music, I need to be in an overly high class orchestra performing at the Ritz.  Which I doubt that will happen any time soon.

Drawing - In the times I'm alone collecting my thoughts, it's very rare that I draw.  For the most part I can think of some really cool objects, backgrounds,  and scenery.  People/Characters however is a totally different story.

Creative Ideas: I love writing stories as much as the next person simply due to the fact that I have so many ideas for my fursona and forms and with other characters furry, fan made, and official.  But it's always better if drawn so that everyone can actually get the image in their minds instead of guessing what they read and get confused while reading on.  Ex: My VOCT entry and Vision of Fate chapters.

Logic: Time is the only factor in this.  Of course i can buy basic supplies and draw traditionally, but I need to draw more and more until one of these centuries I get it right.  I also want some good pointers from other artists that I admire but I'm afraid that they might be one of the artist in particular.  She's an awesome mobian artist especially in action scenes, but has a "I don't give to shits/My way or a thousand foot drop off the highway" attitude.  Sure I can understand that everyone has a life but there's no need to be mean about it towards those that want to be as good as them.

That's all I've got mainly.  Sure I can make more yarnballs, but I need money to kick things off.  In any case, I can't just sit around doing nothing but play Reach.  Then again, after applying for proper basic jobs in town, that's all I can do.  I need art supplies to actually start drawing and scanning should I even finish anything.  A better computer/laptop should I want to render anything and possibly a grand to afford an awesome 3D program.  And because of my conflicted mind state I can't think of anything musically for now.

So mainly the ultimate question is which path should I really take from here while pursuing the common goal to get back on my feet?
Viewed: 23 times
Added: 8 years, 3 months ago
8 years, 3 months ago
maybe while yer out there hun you should look into some good classes to take some of these courses.  See if yer folks can hook ya up with that maybe at CLC
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