So i start to think with growing viewer base on my streams and stuff its good to let people at least know im streaming or not on Pomf
And this week i wont be, ive got alot on my mind per usual, and commishes to do for sure
I usually want to try to stream on Monday or Tuesday, and ive tried to keep consistant to those days, ive had trouble here and there, among the stress not knowing what to do as i want to entertain, i know you guys would be happy talking to me but i want to provide a little content too, im not great at ideas on my own, or even if i am some of them fall through?
Outside streams--- Im just- abit of a mess. My commishes paid for loom over me in my head, i worry im not getting to the other ones setup fast enough, im trying to make money to help my friend come over and my friends in general, i have chats im not catching up and telegram is my WORST offense right now
Everything, everyday, is alot for me, and im trying my best to ease myself and set it in the planner my friend bought me to sort my bits which is and isnt working, i have a massive problem with overloading myself, this overthinking mind both curse and blessing
I can come out with amazing ideas and i love brainstorming with people but on the flipside my overthinking about all the everything i have to do is a quick spiral to an overload wanting to do it all, and time passes and next thing i know, i have to try doing a stream, or something else i tried to plan and im behind
I dunno, all i can say is im trying, but i dont know if im trying hard enough too at times, i feel i procrastinate some, like maybe playing too many games at times and losing track of time, but i still want to feel ive been showing some dilligence and before even the dilligence im doing well in my art because my usual self esteem issues coupled with art
You guys keep me going for sure though, its not a full fix, i ever have my self doubts, but i appreciate all the kind words you guys give to me, saying ym stuff is good, that youre happy with a commish i did, trying to boost my confidence
I just wish i could take the words to heart more and be less hard on myself, but i fight through doubts and get through it, and make neat stuff peeps enjoy x3
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2 years, 1 month ago
22 Mar 2022 18:42 CET
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